Poncetastic 2020

[VivaJen]

I came on looking for the annual thread but can't find it so here is the start (courtesy of Fellatio - wherever you are)

OK, first of all, I know it's still September by we need to start this thread now because as you all know, having a truly Poncetastic Christmas involves precision planning, strategy, bravery, heroics, and frequently martyrdom. A bit like the war in Afghanistan, only with nicer food and sparkly shoes.

So, if you, like me, actually want to make the next twelve weeks of your life a misery by hand-crafting your cards, finding a huge bucket for Nigella's turkey in brine, pickling pears, shrivelling oranges in a low oven for those rustic au naturel decorations, dragging half a holly bush back from the woods, and just generally being a smug annoying jobsworth ponce, join me on this thread.

Feel free to post photos of previous tree-trimming, cake icing or table centrepiece triumphs, discuss this year's bauble colour themes, debate the merits of Delia versus Gordon, road-test a selection of canapes and cocktails, (all in the line of duty) and link to lovely inspirational photos/craft ideas for a truly Poncetastic Christmas.

Warning: If your idea of a good Christmas involves Pizza, ITV, gravy granules or anything with 'Aunt Bessies' on the packet, this is not the thread for you".

@Trumpton

My mantelpiece Garland is intertwined with old fairy lights . They were bought by DH’s late father to go around DH’s cot the year he was born. DH is 69 now . They are fragile and only go on for an hour or so each evening .

Those fairy lights are utterly beautiful. My grandmother had the Pifco cinderella carriages, and lanterns, now selling for about £300 each on ebay, every year I say I'm going to buy a set and be buggered and then I just shout at myself and keep scrolling.

@TheSeedsOfADream my auntie had those carriages too.

Thanks @trumpton

May I join you lovely lot? I've been threatening to put the tree up since March 20th. I have resisted, mainly because DH felt my forehead each time I mentioned it.

I am going to make a cake. I am! I am, dammit. I haven't made one for years, and nobody eats it but me, but that matters not. I'm in.

Also thinking of knitting some ornaments. Shall watch this thread for any good ideas in that regard.

Am loving this.

@2018SoFarSoGreat what sort of ornaments? I'm currently knitting a wreath as a gift for another MNer and the pattern was also written by an MNer - I can post a link if you are interested.

Otherwise:
Bunting or garlands
Knitted Santas or Scandi style gnomes - these could be weighted and used as doorstops
Baubles
A knitted nativity (the Jean Greenhowe one is brilliant)
A throw or cushion covers
Christmas themed tea cosies or cafetière covers
Coasters
Napkin rings
Chocolate orange covers or fererro rocher covers for table gifts
I'm sure I've even seen Santa themed loo roll covers - a bit more kitch than poncetastic

would love your wreath pattern @TheWoollybacksWife!

Am officially inspired with that list. Thank you! Doorstops here I come.

Can we talk tree lights? I need some new ones and if you google it recommends 100 lights per foot of tree. I’m pretty certain I only had about 200 on my 8 foot tree last year so surely 800 would be a bit much?

Depends on the size of the bulbs; if they're micro lights you'll probably need a lot more.

And whether you want to look like Blackpool illuminations!

@2018SoFarSoGreat the wreath pattern was written by @doodlejump1980 and is listed on eBay here

I'm a big fan of more is more when it comes to tree lights. I think this was photo was about 800 lights.

@2018SoFarSoGreat
Also this Father Christmas washing line was fun to knit . I got the pattern from eBay

@Trumpton that is fantastic! I shall aspire to such excellent poncing.

I think this might be the year I actually stop off on this thread, look around for inspiration and actually make some of my own stuff!

Ok one more
I am thinking of doing a Sylvanian Nativity this year

The Father Christmas washing line is fabulous!

@Trumpton you ponce away. You deserve every bit of ponce!

Aww @Trumpton Sylvanian nativity sounds fun! We still have some of my figures somewhere but I've not got a clue where 🤷‍♀️

Thanks @TheWoollybacksWife
My knitted wreath pattern is available here. 😊⛄️

www.ebay.co.uk/itm/223829715320

Does anyone else struggle with getting the balance between lighting the tree and being able to see the decorations?

My baubles are eclectic without any repeating pattern for the eye to easily predict, and I feel that it all just disappears a bit when the lights go on.

Admittedly my starting point of 1000 lights on a 7ft tree might have been over doing it slightly

I covered my tree in fake snow last year which helped with the contrast a bit but I still feel like all my lovely baubles aren’t as visible as they should be.

@Trumpton have you ever forced regular narcissi? I have tete a tete ones and I can't figure out the timings for them or if they can be inside or need to be out in the garage. And do they need soaking first?? So many questions and googling just confuses me I'm growing them on pebbles.

I am pretty sure that narcissi do not need to be forced . I have never done anything special to mine , just whopped them onto washed pebbles and stood back . The only poncy thing I do with them if dpfeed them gin !

Sorry ... pre- prepped for forcing . Trying to multitask !

I’m loving seeing all these pics! This is my first year poncing and has given me so many ideas

@Trumpton

Ok one more I am thinking of doing a Sylvanian Nativity this year

I have a playmobil nativity, but sylvanian one sounds amazing!