Really panicking that the Dc won’t have enough!

[Foxton20]

Dh has taken it upon himself to do the Xmas shopping this year because “I go over the top”.

He’s gone for quality over quantity.

Dd11 has-

Holister jumper
Vans
2 x tshirts
Anne frank book
Reed defuiser
Starbucks mug
£10 Starbucks voucher
Another book
Wreck it journal
Cajigprahy set

Ds10 has-

Nintendo Ds which he wanted
Nintendo game
Youtuber merch
A book about space
Guinness world record book
Nasa top
£10 Greggs voucher 😂
Another Ds game

Dd3

Barbie set
Cinderella doll
Book
Pants
(Not finished her yet)

I’m in charge of stockings and no idea what to get?!

I want to get the exploding kitten game for ds.

I’m worried they will be disappointed 😩

It’s most of their stuff off their wish lists

I just don’t get the “clothes aren’t for Christmas” mentality.

Dd 12 needs a winter coat which I would normally buy from M&S, Next etc for around £40. However she has asked for one from Urban Outfitters for around £80 and I have bought it for Christmas. She will be absolutely over the moon with it as told her it was way too much for a coat and “Santa” wouldn’t be bringing it.

Are the people who are say clothes aren’t for Christmas trying to say that if their child had asked for that coat at any point through out the year they would have just bought it on a whim?

I’m beginning to think the people with that view might only have younger children and not understand how much brands/styles excite 12+

@3littlemincemeatpies I have a 13 year old and a 21 year old. So I understand the clothes thing.

Re a winter coat - I buy one a year of their choosing - less so for the 21 year old now but she's at uni so I do from time to time if needed.

I'll ask what they want and just get it. No buying on a whim or anything - I just buy a winter coat I try and buy to last so nope, I wouldn't buy £££ coats but the one I've bought my youngest was £60 and by Puma and that, for me, is in the ballpark

I do not get that clothes are not for Christmas my son has put on his Christmas list a few designers tracksuits there £75-80 a pop so he’s got them for Christmas. Does not mean he has no clothes decent Designer clothes in his wardrobe.

Enough for what?

I think you have absolutely no need to feel guilty, the stress it is causing you isn’t what Christmas is about really, is it?

DS has a Christmas birthday (birthmas ) He’s getting one main Christmas gift, one main birthday gift, and a stocking filled with craft (playdough) books and some chocolate. I have asked anyone else buying gifts to please also just do 1 Christmas, 1 birthday, and if they can’t help it (DM who truly loves to spoil, which we of course appreciate) clothes or crafts or books.

Plus, as he has a Christmas birthday, Father Christmas is bringing him one extra ‘special’ gift.

Really scaled it back this year. The previous years were insane, he was so so overwhelmed and spent most of the day screaming.

My DH comes from a third world country and speaks fondly of the ‘one’ special Christmas present he would get. Christmas was about so much more than the presents for him, and we want to try and get back to that ourselves.

I know this may change as he gets older (he’s under 5) but hopeful that this way he gets to really appreciate the gifts he gets, and also that he will play with them, vs running round in a flap not knowing what to do because there’s a mountain of toys to choose from.

But who knows. It’s really hard when your kid is born on December 25th

On quick glance sounds like son with Nintendo and game is having lots spent but maybe not the others

@scorpido I’m not being funny but what’s the point in buying to last if they get a new one every year?

I just buy a coat every winter. Err kids grow? I donate the too small one to a charity shop if that helps?

Not sure what me purchasing new coats each year has to do with anything! My point was that I personally do not pass off clothes as Xmas gifts. I do however understand stuff like expensive trainers and designer gear being gifted. A winter coat? No. I personally wouldn't

My point was that I personally do not pass off clothes as Xmas gifts

They aren't being passed off as Christmas gifts though, they are Christmas gifts. Children can, and do, appreciate clothes as Christmas gifts and there is no reason why they shouldn't.

@scorpido I’m not quite sure why you keep using the phrase “passing off” though...

I asked DD last night what her her 3 top things on her Christmas list was, bearing in mind that all my kids are absolutely spoiled and she is also getting a sonos, sprocket, kindle paper among lots of other things and the jacket is number 1!!

How is that “passing off” if it’s the thing she’s most look forward to receiving?

Reading this thread, I think I live in a different reality to some people. I’m amazed at how much money is spent on several presents per child.

I don't buy clothes for Christmas but i suffered from the July birthday as a kid so was always given a bag and shoes for going to school in August. It was really shit and only the tail end of certain neglect but it left me cold about five if normal everyday things you buy anyway as gifts.

I think of one kid wants a booster hoodie and you wouldn't normally buy that for them then it's fine as a Christmas present. Regardless of cost a hoodie v a DS as a main gift does look a bit unbalanced/.

That's so stupid, I still have a July birthday now - I just don't suffer from it

Sounds great OP. I've booked a holiday for DC for Xmas as they both have near Xmas birthdays and really don't need anything at all. For a few openers they have new bedding and room decorations and books, some family games and of course their stockings. They absolutely love clothes and receiving them as presents but don't currently need anymore

My nan bought me a nightdress with a dog on it one year and it’s one of the few Christmas presents I can actually remember being given. Surely most can agree a three pack of plain white t shirts is not a particularly exciting present for a child, but anything especially wanted or thoughtfully chosen constitutes a nice Christmas gift regardless of cost or whether it’s something practical.

But SatsukiKusakabe nobody has mentioned “three packs of plain T-shirt’s”. We are talking about branded, expensive stuff the DC wouldn’t ordinarily get!

@gamerchick "Clothes aren't presents, they're an obligation as a parent to provide for our kids."

Yeah, it is an obligation to clothe your child. But when your teen wants £100+ trainers or £40+ t-shirts etc. They're nice to haves and are presents!

The £4 t-shirt from H&M is the obligatory T-Shirt...

Yes my point was all the people here arguing about whether clothes constitute presents could probably agree that some clothes do and some don’t. It’s to do with the thoughtfulness of the gift as with all gifts - a designer jacket is of course absolutely a good present, but so is 5.99 t shirt with a unicorn on if they like unicorns, or a pair of new jeans if they could really do with some new jeans and would like to get some.

Clothes are on my 8 year olds christmas list. Specifically youtube 'merch'. Its the stuff I won't buy day to day and is a massive treat for him.

Whenever I read these threads I wonder if I was an atypical kid because I hated getting a mountain of presents at Christmas. Each year there would be 30+ parcels from the extended family, there was so much stuff I hadn't asked for, didn't need, didn't want, didn't know where to put. The dreaded "stocking fillers".
I remember the stress from when I was around six years old. Surely I can't have been the only one?

This is why I'm getting my DC only a small amount of stuff, they get presents from the rest of the family as well and 10 parcels in total are more than enough imo.
They usually lose interest in the other presents as soon as they open the main present anyway.

Even my 6 and 4 year olds like clothing as gifts! I’ve bought them both party dresses from Boden for Christmas that I wouldn’t buy day to day but I know they’ll love them!

my point was all the people here arguing about whether clothes constitute presents could probably agree that some clothes do and some don’t. It’s to do with the thoughtfulness of the gift as with all gifts

Which is valid. My point, also valid, is that for some people they don't have much money and so for Christmas follow the ideas behind the 4 presents through necessity - something they want, something they need, something to read, something to wear.

quality over quantity is definitely better and I’ve tried really hard this year not to go over the top

So far:

DS1 age 13
Trump cards fake news game
Star Wars maze ball
Some sort of video game possibly a Zelda one

DD age 11
Cheap tablet
Small hairdryer
Large sloth teddy

DS2 age 9
Cheap tablet
Possibly some Lego

Plus stockings which in this house is small and low value things - novelty shower gel, socks, chocolate, etc.

@rhubarbcrumbles there is absolutely fuck all wrong with getting clothes as a gift. Ignore people who are telling you otherwise as:

If your DC is old enough for a PlayStation game he is old enough to appreciate nice clothing in a way a younger DC wouldn't (and I wonder how many of the people judging you only have young children and don't realise this, or realise the value of clothes teens like and have to fit them and how often you have to replace them!)

Anyone who judges this is privileged enough not to realise that things like clothes are treats as the DC perhaps have less bought for them throughout the year and they tend to be functional and affordable and needs, rather than "treaty" clothes that are a want not a need.

Some of my DC are getting "nice" knickers rather than the Primark multipacks I usually get and they will be thrilled. They appreciate everything they get and won't turn into adults who would judge someone for buying their DC the presents they don't deem worthy enough for their own children.

Anyone who tells anyone else the presents they have bought for their own DC aren't good enough and judges anyone who not spending enough money, is automatically a knob in my book and their opinions can be safely ignored.

And OP I will give you the benefit of the doubt that perhaps you feel this way as the presents weren't of your choosing and you obviously have spent more in previous years.

If that isn't the case and you simply worry your DC are the type of DC who would be disappointed with that very long list of lovely, quality presents, they perhaps need to realise how extremely privileged they are and learn the art of gratitude (not always inbuilt in teenagers, I know, but it definitely needs cultivating).

At the risk of sounding awfully preachy, my older teens have been asked to donate something to the local children's toy appeal as I really don't want them spending their earned money on me and DH, and I think it pays for them to bear in mind there are DC who literally get nothing for Christmas. I would prefer to think like that than thinking of others (and some of their friends) who they see getting absolutely loads of stuff and perhaps have a natural desire to feel a bit envious.