What's the WORST secret Santa present you've ever had?

[ThreeLittleDinosaursROAR]

There's a thread about the best, but I thought the worst would be funnier. 😁 Would like it to keep it light, so no comments about being ungrateful etc please!

So what's the worst secret Santa present you've ever had?

At 20 yrs of age working in an office I was given a life size penis made of soap.

The giver was a divorced man over 40; he wasn't even supposed to buy me anything as he was buying for someone else 🤢🤮

Unfortunately too young to realise I could have taken him to the cleaners for sexual harassment. Instead I just felt very uncomfortable around him until I left the job

Some of these are just horrible. What cruel colleagues a few of you had! I never take part in SS.

An Arsenal scarf. I am completely indifferent to football and I’m not even English. Baffling. It’s not even as if I go on about hating football, so it could have been a comedy inappropriate gift - the most I’d ever said was that I don’t follow it

A pair of rubber boobs - I was the only woman on the sales team at work, size 10 with 36A breasts. The lads thought it was hilarious...(mind you this was back in the 80s)

Box of tissues. It was a £1 limit but I gave a small bag of fudge so it was possible to not be a twat.
Someone else got a can of WD40 and we never did secret santa at work again.

An infuser kit with those little wooden sticks that you stand in scented liquids. I hate artificial scents .

Make up stuff. I don't wear it but have a complex about being ugly so thought it was the giver's way of saying 'you're ugly and need help.'

I do completely understand I have hang ups and many women would find make up brushes etc useful.

A bottle of super hot chilli sauce. We were a small team and everyone knew I was allergic to chilli because I'd had to use my EpiPen at a staff do in the summer (didn't say anywhere on the menu that the chocolate torte had chilli in it!). Apparently it was an hilarious gift because I was a weakling who couldn't handle the heat

I got "how to look good naked". Never did find out who from...and to be fair, I'm not sure I want to know

In my twenties, a pair of crotchless ann summers pants with the telephone number of the grubby much much older married giver written on the swing tag.

A very strange looking hat and scarf set made of that horrible fuzzy wool in a shade that could only be described as “cowardly lion”. Although I suppose I had thought mines was really thoughtful- a mini hot water bottle and hand warmer set for somebody who was always talking about how cold her flat was- and the receiver looked distinctly underwhelmed when she opened it. Maybe she’ll be along in a minute

Box of ferro Roche when I was 16. After watching all of siblings open presents. The chocolates were just my present for that year.

I've had two. I've only been in 2 secret Santa's!

1. a £5 bottle of red wine from the newsagent next to the office - price label still on. Spends were set at £10.

2. no present. I was given one that was left over but it was one that had had a lot of time and effort put in for the specific recipient who was off. And the secret Santa told me quite rudely not to keep it because it wasn't for me.

Fuckers.

Actually it was a scarf and glove set- they made your hands look like Zippy from Rainbow’s.

Urgh, I fortunately haven't done enough secret Santa's, although one year someone didn't have a present and so were given someone else's gift. They ended up with bright blue and orange nail varnish.

Hate secret Santa, my in-laws want to do it this year

A packet of 6 plain white unscented table candles.

A low level bullying campaign at a previous workplace culminated in the victim receiving a plastic dog shit for secret santa. It was banned after that.

£10 limit - tin of colouring pencils (used as they were all different lengths), a colouring book and a box of almonds... Not awful I guess but just a very odd gift combination!

But then I'm not great at secret santa - this year mines getting a spider catcher as she screams if she's within 15ft of one - last week she refused to walk down the hallway until someone moved a dead spider 😂

Dandruff shampoo and conditioner hidden inside a box of batsmati rice,

Never got anything actually mean but have had enough completely impersonal ones to know not to do SS anymore (part time worker; clearly lots of people don't know me or my tastes etc at all). Worst was a pound shop box of disgusting liqueur chocolates.

Just remembered another one. My name was pulled out by our head of dept. 2 levels below CEO in a huge company and earning a LOT of money.

He didn't bother buying a gift and on the morning of the gift swap the SS organiser ran out and bought a £1 Christmas themed cup.

A mini vibrator disguised as a lipstick

A bottle of neon pink nail varnish from the pound shop. I almost never wear nail varnish ans if I do it's clear or nude.
It went in the bin.

LOVE this thread.

I haven't received anything really bad myself but the head of service did receive a lynx gift set last year.... price was set at £10!!

I was totally regifted one year. I was given a family organiser calendar (at that point in my life I was single with no kids) and a candle which wouldn’t have been so bad but the person who bought it had some kind of candle business so it clearly cost her nothing!