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Christmas

From present ideas to party food, find all your Christmas inspiration here.

No main gift

57 replies

Fullofthought · 10/10/2018 19:53

My 6 year old DD has given me ideas of what to buy for her Christmas and birthday ( Jan) it comes to 615 in total before clothes and sweets. She's had a very awful year and I want to spoil her. But she doesn't have a main gift for either birthday or Christmas. Would you cut a few of the things that she really wants to get her a main gift or get what you know she wants.

OP posts:
Monday55 · 10/10/2018 20:09

Get the little things that she wants and pack it all together in one massive box.

buscaution · 10/10/2018 20:11

Don't spend £615 on little things and get her a main gift plus a few small bits?

Tiggles · 10/10/2018 22:51

I'd get her what she wants. At 6 the value of a wanted item is completely irrelevant and the most wanted thing however small and cheap can be a main gift

GreenTulips · 10/10/2018 22:53

What on earth can a 6 year old want that totals that much before clothes and sweets?

Alanamackree · 10/10/2018 23:04

Intrigued and curious to know how many things are on the list and what they are Smile

SerenDippyEggs · 10/10/2018 23:06

Yes you have to tell us the list, so we can prioritiseGrin

SpoonBlender · 10/10/2018 23:13

Throwing money and toys at her isn't going to make her feel better about the last year, Full.

Pebblesandfriends · 10/10/2018 23:15

The budget is irrelevant, if she's given you ideas and you think she'll like them then just go with that. We have never done 'main' pressies. We are working to a strict budget this year so I have sourced most of my DC's gifts from NCT sales (some brand new some used but all what they wanted) I also have a few new 'from the shop's things in mind for stocking fillers that they pointed out. My point is so long as the stuff is something that they will play with then it doesn't matter. I'm sure she will have a wonderful Christmas Flowers

Floaty2018 · 10/10/2018 23:23

£615 is an obscene amount of money to be spent on a 6 year old. It is besides the point if you CAN afford it, all you are doing is setting the bar at £600 now and it will increase every year until you have a spoilt and entitled teenager / young adult on your hands. How about a gift and a charity donation so that your child understands that even if they have had a bad year, there are others out there who have it even worse, and don't have the luxury of gifts to "make things better".

PegLegAntoine · 10/10/2018 23:25

Ideas doesn’t mean you have to get them all. Choose a few off the list and then decide something as a main gift.

tinstar · 10/10/2018 23:26

I read it as 615 items in the absence of a £ sign Blush. Been scratching my head trying to think what they could all be!

Agree £615 is way too much. But not sure why there needs to be a main present?

AtSea1979 · 10/10/2018 23:27

How on earth did it total so much without a main gift? How many things are on the list? I wouldn’t buy her a main gift i’d get her some of the things on the list. You need to set a budget then prioritise. You can still spoil her and have a fab Xmas after a shitty year without spending that kind of money.

Fullofthought · 11/10/2018 00:05

Think science sets, lol dolls, build a bot, second hand Wii and games, craft bits. A new judo gi, Barbie bits. Most expensive is 40 and cheapest is 2.

OP posts:
Fullofthought · 11/10/2018 00:05

Please remember this is birthday and Christmas gifts. She gets nothing else throughout the year.

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SpoonBlender · 11/10/2018 00:16

All right, that's pretty legit and has good choices (apart from lol dolls arrgh but I know how it is). I don't think you really need a centrepiece with that lot. If you feel you do, make it a bicycle or something similarly outdoorsy/sportsy, to counterpoint the indoor makey/gamey/dollsy stuff.

You will need to be careful how to split it all up, you don't want too many things on the same day else some will just get lost in the shuffle. I can see science sets being left on a shelf in preference for the craft stuff, or vice versa.

Mumof3needswine · 11/10/2018 00:17

We've also had a crap year this year and me and my husband Have purchases every item on our 3 kids lists (dd1 6 dd2 6 ds4 )It came to a shocking amount (you really don't get a lot for your money now a days) but they will love every last present and it won't take away the pants year but it might finish the year of to a half decent standard we didn't get main either but I think at that age there not to bothered about a main and more bothered about opening presents they will like

Isadora2007 · 11/10/2018 00:57

I still think £615 is an awful lot for Xmas and birthday. She doesn’t need all of the items on her list. See if there are similar items on that list and get one or the other. So Barrie stuff OR lol doll, science stuff or art stuff... and if other relatives buy for her maybe you could suggest some of the items you don’t buy.
The no “main gift” doesn’t matter as she Will have a big pile of gifts as it is.

snifflesnifflesnore · 11/10/2018 01:11

You seriously never buy her anything else throughout the year? Why?

When my son was that age it was definitely quantity over quality with him. Nothing wrong with lots of smaller gifts.

MarcieBluebell · 11/10/2018 01:19

At this age money is irrelevant. Some of the presents you mention could be main gifts if she really wants them. A second hand wii and lol doll for example are hefty gifts.

BreakfastAtLitanies · 11/10/2018 01:35

Surely a Wii is a main gift?

triwarrior · 11/10/2018 01:36

I agree with Floaty - £615 is a ridiculous amount of money to spend on a child.

Alanamackree · 11/10/2018 05:53

I can understand that when events have been out of your control, the temptation to lavish gifts on her must be very strong. It’s one thing that you can control in a very tough year. Flowers

But I just want to say to you not to underestimate the impact of your love and support. I’ve been through some pretty rough times in my life and I am so incredibly grateful to my parents for their support and love.

Sometimes providing consistency and certainty can be a hugely important gift to a child if life has left them vulnerable or fearful. And while it sounds like a dream come true to get every item on your wish list, it also could be a little bit destabilizing. Children look for boundaries in different ways. We’re all familiar with the idea of a child acting out, needing an adult to firmly and gently set limits. No limits can be frightening.

If you buy everything on her list, you may as another poster said be setting up expectations (and possibly disappointment for the future). But I’d also be concerned that you could be burdening her with the responsibility to make wise financial choices at an age where she should be indulging in flights of fancy. My dc have circled three quarters of the smyths catalogue and written wish lists of lego sets that they don’t even make anymore. It’s just good fun. They don’t have to be sensible because that’s my job.

Whatever you decide to do, I hope the two of you have a lovely Christmas.

On the subject of “big gifts”: If I take my dc into a toy shop they are drawn to one or two things. Then they look at everything else and then they come back for another look at those one or two things.
Those, regardless of cost, are their big items.

nordicwannabe · 11/10/2018 05:53

Several of those (Wii, build a bot) do sound like main gifts.

£600 is a lot but I do know how quickly it mounts up (I have a 6yo with a January birthday too).

Might be worth thinking about the balance overall, and removing things which are too similar, then mentally putting that budget aside so that you can get them later in the year

Eg get less craft stuff and only one science kit, then buy more in 6 months when you see what she has used; get one lol for Xmas and only get another for her birthday if she enjoys playing with it as well as unwrapping.

Morgan12 · 11/10/2018 06:18

£615 is not an obscene amount at all for a birthday and Christmas.

I think it sounds fine OP. I'd count the Wii as the main gift also.

LiquoricePickle · 11/10/2018 06:20

I think the Wii is a main gift!