DS2 (12) has made a rather long Christmas list.

[CuriousMama]

He keeps on adding to it too. There are no huge consoles on it as we have them all. DS1 saves up for them or we have them anyway.

But it's games and dvds. They're all adding up and he expects to get them all. No way can we even though he'll get from me and dp, my mum, his gran and exdh.

So I came up with an idea. I've asked him to price up everything on the internet and then tot up the amount. I'm hoping it'll make him see sense and not be so greedy.

At the end of his list he also put 'plus other cool stuff that I'll like'

DS1 (15) knows the value of money thank God. Probably because he's good at saving for items he wants. He hasn't asked for much.

It's just all so bloody commercialised isn't it? DCs are under pressure too to keep up with their peers. DS2's friends are getting so much I think that's what's making him extra greedy this year.

If my business takes off (hair at home) I think we may all just go away next year. A small gift each and a holiday instead?

Why does he expect it all? Is this what's happened in the past?
He's old enough to know it doesn't appear by magic, and as you say your elder ds knows the value of money, maybe it's time the younger me had the lesson that his brother has had. Depending on the relationship the boys have, can you enlist the elder to make comments along the lines of "you've got to be kidding with that list- do you think they're made of money"

I'd make it clear he isn't having all of it and make him shortlist the things he really wants and tell him to save up for the rest out of his own pocket money.

Sorry I missed the bit about pals getting loads and you setting up a business. My dd's pals all seem to come from families with 2 full time working parents, I've always chosen to work part time, so obviously there's a bit less money, she accepts this is the price for me being available to her and her brother. Your ds is old enough to understand your financial position,especially with you building a business-don't be afraid to say no to him-it'll do him good in the long run

At 12 he is old enough to understand he can't have everything he wants. I understood that at 8 never mind bloody 12!

Time to sit him down and explain to him. Get him to pick his top 3 or 5 things on the list and tell him anything else will be a bonus but not to expect so much.

I agree it canbe very commercialised and pressured - but only if you let it be so. I ask my ds what his top 2 xmas presents would be.

Does he get pocket money? I'm using this as a way of getting my younger DS to learn the value of money and the benefits of saving/being sensible. I've only recently started it about 3 months ago but it's working very well.

I've always been like that but for the opposite reason. I LOVE surprises. Would hate to ask for a few bits and know what they are! What's the fun in that?!!!

Oh he won't be getting it all. The strange thing is he's not actually into money. DS1 is more so but he saves. DS2 can have a bundle of cash, say from his birthday and it'll be there ages.

He hasn't been like this before but only recently got a big group of friends. More so since starting secondary. Some of them are very image conscious. Luckily he's never been too bad that way but is very tidy. Just not so much into labels.

DS1 did tell him that his list was too big, and laughed at it.

DS2 is rather naive, was being tested for autism until recently but the report came back as him not having it. He's very settled in school now which has made a huge difference.

Anyway later on when his friend has gone home (sleepover) we'll sit down together and price it all up. Then whittle it right down.

Exdh is away at the moment and when he's back will have a chat with him too. Although he's beyond useless sometimes so I won't hold my breath. Dp and ds1 are my best allies

My DD's have always made Christmas lists. They have always been encouraged to think of a couple of things in case family ask what they would like for Christmas.

Then they make a wish list of 3 or 4 things that they would otherwise like.

Then they get a few surprises (admittedly a few things that I over hear or notice that they like) that they haven't asked for.

You are lucky to get this far without this problem. DC have been making lists like that since they were 7 or 8. I had them add it up, too (£1000!!!). They soon learnt to stick to budget.

Life always involves choices & trade-offs. I'm not sure if there's a too young age to learn that.

Yes you're right lljkk I suppose it's the sudden change in him that's made me get a bit of a shock. He's never been materialistic.

They've always made lists just never gone OTT.