Sorry to be the 'party pooper', but does Christmas (or more precisely 'everyone else's Christmas) make you profoundly depressed?

[MrsSeanBean]

I feel such a general failure at this time of year. My house is undecorated (Christmas wise and generally), cluttered, and messy.

I have barely any presents (except for DS) and genuinely can't be bothered.
DH is working Christmas day.
My mum has Dementia.
I will be home alone with DS and feel so sorry for him that I am such a useless parent. :-(
Am I the only one.....?

....oh yes!!!...get some Wizzard or Slade on the cd player!!! (I am such a child of the 1970s!!)

Ds2 (3) was making wrapping paper yesterday (i.e. brown parcel paper to colour on and stick things on!)

There is so much pressure to be madly happy at this time of year, when in fact, a lot of people have spent too much money, are tired, ill and stressed about family issues. That is the reality for many of us...certainly is for me this year!!!

It sounds trite, but I try to count my blessings, it helps

At the ripe old age of 32, it has dawned on me this year that what other people do isn't the be all and end all. All these perfect Christmases you see in magazines and on TV are just made up to look 'typical' when everyone's typical is different.

M and DP both dislike Christmas (he had a shit time growing up, I just hate all the fuss and expense) but we have DD now so we try and make it lovely for her - tbh, she is almost 2 and her excitement this year is a bit infectious, I can feel myself getting excited, for her. We are absolutely skint so we'll be staying in all day, playing with the few gifts we've bought her and watching films on telly. Just us three. Hell, I'm actually quite looking forward to it.

Homebase had a tree in a bag for not much money. Cheap and trashy but fake tree and decs all in there.

If you have an Argos near you, this is an instant xmas I have one in the dining room and my boys love it. They have them in green and larger 6 foot versions.

Don't be fooled by the Sunday-supplement version of Christmas, OP.
Very few of us actually have Christmases like that.
But that's okay. They are still fun.

Remember that many Christmas traditions actually pre-date Christmas but have been co-opted because they make us Northern Hemis feel so much better at this glum time of year.

In these darkest months there is nothing more cheerful that light. So bring on the candles, the fairy lights and the glitter. They will work a trick, I promise.

And this is a time of year where folk were very grateful if they had plenty of food stored and so a feast was very much in order, both for the enjoyment but also in recognition of just how lucky that is.
So bring on the traditional comfort food, the little luxuries, the seasonal produce.

Once you start to think of the Christmas traditions as things designed specifically to bring cheer they begin to make so much more sense.

I dislike this time of year too. It's depressing.

if it wasn't for my dd i could quite easily stay in bed xmas day.i love xmas eve but as for xmas day i can't stand it.
i'm really not feeling it at all this year

Oh, I want to go to B&Q now!!

Despite my absurdly long list of things to do, I wonder if I'll have time to pop down there tomorrow?!

upahill thanks so much for the tip on the cake in a bag from Tesco - I got one for £3 and will make it with DS on Friday :-)

IF you can, then get some fairy lights...they really lift the spirits...just put them round the window or mirror in the sitting room...did you not have much of a christmas as a child MrsSean?

DS will love that MrsBean! I think it's because we have to build them up...teach them to be excited...that's hard if you don't really know how to "do Christmas" ...it's all about making traditions really...every CHristmas Eve, I have the elves knock on the door...and when the DDs open it, there is nobody there but a gift bag with their new Christmas pyjamas in them...they LOVE this almost more than the pressies the next day! New Pjs from the Elves are only about a fiver from Primark...write a note so DS can see who left them.

BandoMothers - great idea for new PJs - that's lovely!
Cwm - thanks for the link to the lanterns.

I can't remember much about Christmas from when I was small. We used to go to an 'uncle' on Boxing Day and that was always nice as I remember limitless and yummy food.

My only other memory is of being left alone in bed all day one Christmas and Boxing Day as I was ill/ sick and kept seeing funny patterns all over the ceiling - some kind of weird delirium maybe. I remember being really upset no-one came up to see how I was. I must have been about 8 then.

It's easy for people who had lovely Christmases to enjoy them...my friend had bad ones...her Dad was always depressed and she had no Mum...she remembered it being a sad time but she's changed it all for herself andyou can make your DS's Christmas memories lovely...he's old enough to really enjoy it now...it's not about money either but about spending more time with people and playing games...and Christmas songs on the radio...and baking...and making deocrations...I hope you manage to enjoy it this year.

Yes - it absolutely isnt about how much you spend.

My ds21 (8) has loved his advent candle this year (he doesnt like choc so no point getting a choc advent calender).....he is old enough now to light it himself which he loves.

Ds2 (3) has enjoyed decorating the treee ( we dont go mad....a few fairy light and candles and a smallish tree in each reception room) and a wreath on the door and making the xmas cake.

Am planning to spend xmas eve watching xmas themed dvds with them in their new xmas pjs (we love pjs in this house!!) and just being with them and NOT DOING ANY HOUSEWORK/JOBS

We made loads of paperchains (with sellotape) yesterday out of wrapping paper, the girls loved it and spent an hour doing it, the place is more festive but still messy!