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Original poster

My mum received a Christmas card today...

22 replies

KellyKettle · 12/12/2011 19:06

Dear KelllyKettlesParents,

Wishing you a merry Christmas

From

MIL, DIL, KellyKettle, MrKettle, DD1 & DD2.

Why is my MIL sending Christmas cards from me? I'm 33. And why is she sending them to my parents?

Rhetorical questions really. DH has asked. She says it's a mistake. Weird.

OP posts:
SingingTunelessly · 12/12/2011 19:10
Xmas Grin

She was probably on a card-writing roll and not even thinking too much by that point.

Original poster
KellyKettle · 12/12/2011 19:15

It'd not a surprise really. She makes all her own cards and did our wedding invites. She made a few extra evening do ones for her friends...

OP posts:
Original poster
KellyKettle · 12/12/2011 19:15

And now I don't have to send a card to my parents! Grin

OP posts:
Fayrazzled · 12/12/2011 19:24

Sounds to me like she signs all her Christmas cards with all your names and forgot not to when it came to your parents. Weird.

BerthaTheBogBurglar · 12/12/2011 19:27

But that means she is sending cards from you to lots of other people, doesn't it? The 'mistake' was in putting your name on the one to your parents, not that she put your name on a card.

Why don't you send your MIL a card like this:

Dear MIL,

Wishing you a merry Christmas

From

MIL

and see what happens?

My MIL used a photo of herself, FIL, SIL, DH and I on her Christmas card the first year dh & I were married. She sends hundreds of cards. I tried not to think about there being a photo of me stuck up on hundreds of strangers' walls that Christmas. Actually MIL still has old photo christmas cards stuck on her fridge and randomly stuffed in the edges of picture frames. There are probably quite a few people around the world with a 15-year-old photo of me stuck in picture frames in their houses. Eeek.

Original poster
KellyKettle · 12/12/2011 19:35

That's what I said! Her mistake was not deleting it off my parents card (she probably printed the insert)

DH has asked her to stop doing it. She said it was an old template which means she's probably been doing it for 7/8 years.

Can't be an old template because DD2's name was on it and she's only 8 weeks old.

OP posts:
Original poster
KellyKettle · 12/12/2011 19:36

Haha! Bertha I just told DH your suggestion and he's keen!

OP posts:
grumpydwarf · 12/12/2011 20:49

If it makes you feel any better Kettle my MIL sent my mum a christmas card with a picture of my DS (6mos) from my DS! I had already sent my mum a card from the grumpy family but hey ho! am trying no to be grrr about it but.............
pours large glass of Wine

Original poster
KellyKettle · 12/12/2011 21:32

I bet it's to do with being proud of their families grumpy.

MIL has denied it now which made me Angry but you're right, better to get over it.

OP posts:
TheRealMBJ · 12/12/2011 21:37

Weirdo Grin

TBH, I'm starting to rounder whether there are any normal MILs out there.

Kelly, won't you pop over to the tandem thread, please? I need some hand holding.

grumpydwarf · 12/12/2011 21:41

hmm thanks kelly but highly unlikely combined with a thorough history of passive agressive comments/acts, complete dominance of her baby (sorry love didn't see you at the birth!) and generally MIL craziness. Have learnt to accept that some people are batshit crazy different and am now breathing through everything that makes me ponder what it would be like to have a normal one!
Mums of boys having difficulties letting go is a re-curring theme in my house hold! poor grumpy DS will have a wife with many stories for mumsnet im sure!

greensnail · 12/12/2011 21:42

Kelly, that's really cheered me up and given me some ideas to liven up christmas card writing Grin

Original poster
KellyKettle · 12/12/2011 21:52

Oh grumpy I was probably bring overly positive - DH thinks she likes to pretend the girls are hers which is why she wants them on her cards. I've posted on too many threads about MIL today but she is an odd one.

If she just said "oh sorry, thought you wouldn't mind me putting everyone on" then it'd be fine. It's bugging me that she's denying it. My mother has the card!

Snail - I owe you an email I know - was waiting for proper tinternet but Sky are having probs with our new house.

MBJ - I will come over. Sorry lovely. I owe a big update anyway and an email to Eau too x

OP posts:
greensnail · 12/12/2011 21:55

Don't worry, I know you have a lot on at the moment :)

grumpydwarf · 12/12/2011 21:58

no im sure your right but we evil DIL's always feel everything our MIL's do is completly on purpose and vindictive (sp)! oh and plus she told me she had cards printed with his pic on which i though was nice she wanted to send out her cards with the baby on but "forgot" to tell me that they were from him!
think passive-agressively trying to stamp her mark on him to my mum but prob am reading too much into it!
tell me a funny story about evil MIL's to stop me thinking the worst of mine Kelly! we can play whose is worse! thats a massivly fun game to play unless the MIL MNpolice hunt me down again :(

GloriaHosannahHeadachePumpkin · 12/12/2011 22:17

She sounds like my MIL. She's a mental auld witch as well. Can I join in the whose is worse game? :)

Let's see. The only thing she's had the time to do with DS (seven weeks) is wake him up during the afternoon so he'll sleep better at night. When he then screamed for two hours until I managed to feed him back to sleep she seemed most confused.

She also told me to use a stage two teat as he was obviously hungry and a lazy feeder (he was two weeks old at this point and we were still struggling with the fact breastfeeding was clearly not going to work)

"Don't put the baby in your room." Well that is what they recommend to reduce SIDS. "Well DON'T!" (we did)

"My two were weaned and on three square meals at ten weeks!"

I haven't spoken to anyone who got a Christmas card from her yet this year so I don't know if she's putting him in or on them but I wouldn't put it past her, I stole her baby so she has some sort of claim on mine clearly!

Original poster
KellyKettle · 12/12/2011 22:43

Oh super idea grumpy.

First holiday with DH. My MIL repacked my suitcase while I was at work. Rolled up all my knickers and thongs into more sensible shapes and kindly moved the million condoms I'd packed to a less vulnerable spot in my bag.

She came to stay with DH and I last year. DH, DD1 & I all in bed. I was topless. She opened our bedroom door which woke me, I looked at her and she just stared back like "why aren't you up yet?" then left. DH asked "what was that?" and I said "your mum just came in". When we got up he asked her why she came in our room, she said she didnt and burst into tears. Made me question my sanity.

She asked me if BIL was DD1s father because she looked like him and not DH (rubbish btw).

Your turn...Smile

OP posts:
grumpydwarf · 12/12/2011 22:48

Mine told me she wasn't coming to our wedding because she couldn't invite "her friend the lady who works in boots" and that way her friend could come instead. That was on top of the 115 people who just had to come. She also wore a dress very similar to my wedding dress and first thing she said to me on the day was "do I look ok?"

She told me that she would be most hurt if we ever tried to take her baby away at Xmas to see my dsis in USA, I told her she keep DH if it meant that much to her.

Continually tells me that all DS's toys are rubbish and she must purchase new ones straight away (some are second hand)

During pg told me all of the names I like were horrible and we should only use hers or Fil names otherwise they would be very upset.

Could go on all day...

grumpydwarf · 12/12/2011 23:00

Ps kelly similar vein but when me and Dh then bf started going out he lived with them and after first night staying at their house she came into the bathroom whilst I was in the bath and tried to chat with me! Fourth time I stayed she came in whilst I was asleep in bed and "got in to chat" v strange

Original poster
KellyKettle · 13/12/2011 09:56

Oh my God, grumpy that made me choke on my tea! Does she have any other DC? It reminds me of a time I was staying at my mums and my step-Gran was poorly and staying too. I was in the bath but must not have locked the door. Gran came in and said "oh sorry KK, how are you?", pulled down her knickers and did a wee. She then stayed to chat afterwards, just sat on the toilet. It was mortifying and hilarious at the same time! Grin

The thing with my MIL is that I'm angry at the time but afterwards I can see the funny side. Well, with most of the things she does.

I could also fill the thread with stories about my mother, who is as bad in her own way. I do wonder if my own children or children-in-law will eventually be posting stories like this about me.

I do still shudder at the image of her rearranging my knickers and contraceptive.

OP posts:
grumpydwarf · 13/12/2011 11:24

nope DH is her one and only PFB! I try like you to see the funny side but even now looking back at my wedding pictures grates on me. i honestly think she saw my dress and picked something pretty much the same (white with black flowers) on purpose and no one will ever convince me otherwise!

i now lock the door even if I am brushin my teeth if they are around! I must admit that if I thought she had been through my contraception I would be very creeped out but she did arrange all of my underwear in drawers when we moved house and I was in hospital. sure it was well intentioned but still made me Hmm

I am not allowed to be mad about anything thought as everytime she phones (3-4 times per day) she delights in telling me that I am hers, her daughter and she loves me more than life. One day she annouced in John Lewis that her son married her daughter and had her grandson which Im sure the lady on the till thought was very incestous (sp!)

PeanutsRoastingOnAnOpenFire · 13/12/2011 12:32

My Mum received a card form her cousin....To Peanuts DM, Peanut and David (who happens to be my deceased DF) I presume she meant my DB.
After 25 years how hard is it to remembers someones name?! Xmas Angry

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