Ingredients:
- 2 cups flour
- 1 stick butter
- 1 cup of water
- 1 tsp baking soda
- 1 cup of sugar
- 1 tsp salt
- 1 cup of brown sugar
- Lemon juice
- 4 large eggs
- Nuts
- 2 bottle wine
- 2 cups of dried fruit
Sample the wine to check quality. Take a large bowl, check
the wine again. To be sure it is of the highest quality,
pour one level cup and drink. Repeat. Turn on the electric
mixer. Beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl. Add
one teaspoon of sugar. Beat again. At this point it's
best to make sure the wine is still OK. Try another cup...
Just in case. Turn off the mixerer thingy. Break 2 eggs and
add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit.
Pick the frigging fruit up off floor. Mix on the turner..
If the fried druit gets stuck in the beaterers just pry it
loose with a drewscriver. Sample the wine to check for
tonsisticity. Next, sift two cups of salt. Or something.
Check the wine. Now shift the lemon juice and strain your
nuts. Add one table. Add a spoon of sugar, or some fink.
Whatever you can find. Greash the oven. Turn the cake tin
360 degrees and try not to fall over. Don't forget to
beat off the turner. Finally, throw the bowl through the
window. Finish the wine and wipe counter with the
cat.
Go to Tesco (ideally by bus) and buy cake.
Bingle Jells!