Five hour round trip on Boxing Day?

[LouiseInLondon]

We usually go to in-laws with our 2 DCs (10 and 13) on Boxing Day and stay two or three nights. This time they have said we can't stay as they will have other family members there.

I said we would go for the day but I am now having second thoughts as it will be a long tiring day and we will probably find it hard to relax as we will be thinking about the journey back. Didn't really want to book a hotel as it would be expensive (need two rooms I think) and not that nice.

Any Advice?

dont go, is my advice. Could they come to you at some point during the holiday?

They don't visit us anymore as they won't drive here now and FIL doesn't like staying away from home (he's now 80 so I don't blame him).

I guess I think of the boxing day thing as a tradition now as we have been doing it since DS was a baby, so 13 years!

any chance of a cheap Travelodge room nearby? You could probably manage with one room just for the night

Do they not see it as tradition too? Seems strange they would offer the beds to others when you always stay. I would think my in laws were trying to tell me something!

well if you have been doing it for 13 years it is a bit strange that this year the inlaws have decided to change things without talking to you about it first.

Louise, I would be inclined to visit them before or after Christmas instead. If before, you could have a mini Christmas, with early presents from and to GP's, and a nice festive lunch. Plan something else to do on Boxing day with the DC that they wouldn't ordinarily be able to do if at the GP'S.

If you really want to go, travel there Boxing morning, stay the day and evening and travel back next day. It wouldn't be so bad spending just one night in a Travelodge. The DC are old enough to stay up a bit later, so you would only be going there to sleep.

It won't be long before the DC would rather stay at home for Christmas, see their mates etc, perhaps the GP's haven't considered that possibility! But perhaps they have been put on the spot by the people they plan to have stay. Seems a bit odd that they would do this, but old people do strange and unpredictable things at times. Maybe they think you would be not offended, or can afford the hotel stay, or don't mind doing a long drive each way. It's easy to forget how hard it is when you don't do it yourself anymore. They think you're still young and can cope with anything, not that you might have been working up to and on Christmas eve and are shattered.

Thanks all for your comments.

The others staying are also close family, but they don't come every year, they live overseas. With the numbers of children increasing and the kids getting older they obviously feel that they can't cope with us all at once this year. I also feel it gets a bit hectic but of course the cousins enjoy spending time together, and the GPs like to see them together.

I think there is also an assumption that we can afford to pay for accomodation but of course that is not as nice for the kids as staying at nanny and grandads, especially if we resort to the travelodge!

In light of what you just said I would see if there was a hotel nearby doing a decent xmas lunch and stay there. That way, you all get to spend time together but can escape have some breathing space if you need it.

Yes, I can see that it might all be too noisy and busy for the ILS. I can also see why you want to be there and see the other relatives from overseas, in which case a meal out for all of you on Boxing day might be the best solution, with you staying overnight at the travelodge. Or you could bring buffet food with you to share, and all go out for a walk after lunch so that the ILS can get a nap to refresh themselves for later.