Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Children's health

Mumsnet doesn't verify the qualifications of users. If you have medical concerns, please consult a healthcare professional.

Original poster

I am so sad for my DD

54 replies

ComeWhineWithMe · 11/02/2009 16:10

She is 9 she has dyspraxia and is already classed as odd by her peers .
She had an eye apt on Monday and the doctor wasn't happy with her sight in the right eye and said she would contact me in a couple of days after chatting with the consultant.
She rang today and they would like her to wear a patch for up to 6 hours a day ,she also mentioned that it could be better for her to wear it for a couple of hours in the schoolday because her bad eye will be doing more at school .
When I told her her face fell and she said "they are all going to laugh at me Mum"
and she is right they will ,the SENCO says she will have a chat with her tomorrow and I know on the long run it is in her best interest I am just so sad for her and I know how cruel kids can and have been to her in the past.

Not looking for a solution just needed a little sympathy moan .

OP posts:
herbietea · 11/02/2009 16:17

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Original poster
ComeWhineWithMe · 11/02/2009 16:20

Thanks . I feel really bad for her it is worse aswell because her siblings all do so well at school and she really struggles with it especially when they are invited out and have people to play with at school ,they involve her but she gets lonely only today a classmate told her she couldn't sit at their table 'cos dd's sandwiches made her sick .

OP posts:
patspeed · 11/02/2009 16:21

I feel for you on this one

We were in the same position with DS who has Aspergers

In the end I spoke to the doctor and we agreed he didn't have to wear the patch in school, if he would wear it at all other times

He wore it fine then and doesnt need it anymore, Yah!

I felt his confidence was too low at the time to push with something else

I felt like I was doing the a terrible thing but it worked out well in the end

Contact lenses for secondary

Original poster
ComeWhineWithMe · 11/02/2009 16:23

I am not happy with her wearing it at school but the doctor said it would be reviewed in 6 weeks at her next appt so it is only a short time ,I will see what the senco says tomorrow .

OP posts:
onebatmother · 11/02/2009 16:24

Oh CWWM that's horrid about the sandwiches. Is there any point in talking to the teacher or will it just exacerbate it? So sorry for your dd and you - could you consider what patspeed suggests?

herbietea · 11/02/2009 16:25

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Original poster
ComeWhineWithMe · 11/02/2009 16:28

The doctor more or less said she should at least give it a go at school.
The children have been told to stop with the name calling but one of the girls is very bitchy and nasty and has lots of little hangers on who will join in with her .

OP posts:
Alibabaandthe40nappies · 11/02/2009 16:29

Ah ComeWhine that's rubbish

I had to have one of those massive braces with the metal bits that go round your head when I was at school - I bloody hated it and got the piss taken something awful.
Have a very un-Mumsnet hug for you and your DD.

Original poster
ComeWhineWithMe · 11/02/2009 16:29

Herbie that is so lovely your DS sounds very mature you should be so proud of him.

OP posts:
Original poster
ComeWhineWithMe · 11/02/2009 16:30

Thankyou for all the hugs too (it wont get us kicked off MN will it for hugging ? ).

OP posts:
andlipsticktoo · 11/02/2009 16:30

CWWM my ds1 had to wear a patch over one eye for all his waking hours when he was 5, and it just wasn't an issue at school at all. His friends just took it in their stride so you may be surprised.
His eye is now totally corrected, so it was definitely worth it!
I do understand your worries totally though.
Could she wear it as soon as she gets up and wear it up til break time? I'm sure if you had a quiet word with her teacher about your concerns, they would keep a special eye on her to make sure there weren't any problems.
She could then wear the patch for a couple of hours before she went to bed.

Original poster
ComeWhineWithMe · 11/02/2009 16:34

Lipstick the thing is that we only realised she had a problem with her eyes last year and because she is that bit older I think it will be a bigger issue kids are more accepting of others the younger they are .

Her teacher is rubbish TBH she is very distant and not that nice TBH the senco is better and does try .

OP posts:
mamadiva · 11/02/2009 16:34

I had to wear a patch for 4 months when I was 6, wasn't a nice experience according to my mum but I don't remember, I do however remember telling people I was a pirate and that's what it was for

Although I did get bullied very badly because I had 18 arts on my hands so at playtimes and lunchtimes noone wanted to sit next to me or hold my hand in line used to upset me I imagine but now I don't really remember it.

Don't worry she'll be fine.

nickschick · 11/02/2009 16:41

cwwm - that bloody awful and a sign of the awful times we live in - can you decorate the patch with stick on gems?? can she have a special necklace or bracelet to wear that the other girls might admire?

can you invite some kids round to play and encourge them to play with just one eye so they see how hard it is for her?

is there anyone in a older class who might 'befriend' her??

Do u wanna borrow my ds2 whose currently excluded for fighting ( not justifiable but understandably- another thread another time tho)to bodyguard her for a few weeks?

What about a sharp retort for the nasty girl?

'i wear a patch so i dont have to eep looking at you'

Original poster
ComeWhineWithMe · 11/02/2009 16:46

Lol nickschick .I will have to train her with that retort it's a good one !

OP posts:
onebatmother · 11/02/2009 16:50

no chance of approaching parents of vile girl? or are they vile too?

Original poster
ComeWhineWithMe · 11/02/2009 16:53

Her grandmother picks her up and she is a perfect PFB ,I did once talk to her Gran but she told me I had made her GD cry with my lies !

It also dosen't help that the Grandmother is the cook in school she is a very pampered perfect child .

OP posts:
onebatmother · 11/02/2009 17:14

oh god, that's crap.
I'd ask for appt with ht then, before dd starts with patch. 'there've been problems with cruel comments before and tbh I haven't been terribly happy with how they've been dealt with. Now this patch thing is coming up, can we work together on a strategy for dealing with the unpleasantness that I'm pretty sure is coming, and from this one child in particular."

onebatmother · 11/02/2009 17:16

sorry, just seen your op again and that you're after sympathy rather than half-baked plans

I do really feel for you.

VeniVidiVickiQV · 11/02/2009 18:00

I had an eye patch as a child and I felt conscious of it so I dont blame her. Most of my classmates were just curious about it really, but that didnt change how I felt. Nowadays though, you can get pirate-style eye patches, and more jazzy ones for children so it might worth asking?

DD feels a bit conscious of her hearing aids too. She hasnt come up against any major teasing yet, but I'm fully expecting it. You feel so helpless, dont you?

onebatmother · 11/02/2009 18:11

actually yes vvv I saw a very funky patch a couple of weeks ago and it really did look v different from the standard nhs pink one..

hold on..

RubyRioja · 11/02/2009 18:15

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

onebatmother · 11/02/2009 18:16

these are in america but I bet there are British sites.

RubyRioja · 11/02/2009 18:18

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

onebatmother · 11/02/2009 18:21

oh yes Ruby, the t-shirt/patch combo's are v good

Swipe left for the next trending thread