Parents with children who have had operations under general anaesthetic? What do you do whilst they are in theatre?

[oldmoutcider]

My son is due to have an operation next week. Never experienced this before so unsure what I should do. I would prefer to be in a quiet room by myself with no one talking to me as I know general chit chat would seriously piss me off. My partner is a smoker so will be off for a fag at any opportunity. What kind of things did you do to stay occupied whilst they were gone?

When my husband was in an operation I went for a walk on my own. Good to keep moving.

I just sat in a waiting area, I think.

Either gone for a coffee/sandwich or stayed in the cubicle if it was a quick op.

Sat and waited with a book and my phone. Fielded text enquiries from MIL about how it was going…

We went for breakfast. The time passed quicker keeping busy and trying to do normal things.

When my dd was in for surgery I took a whole bunch of things, a book, some crochet, downloaded new games onto my phone, headphones and a list of podcasts.

In reality I just paced about and waited for updates.

Sat in waiting area with DH...there was no need or expectation to chat to anyone else.

My 3 dc have had quite a few operations between them. Always been given a bleeper which meant you had to stay in the hospital.
I always make sure I eat/drink because I've usually gone hours without (because can't eat round dc when they're NBM) and afterwards it may be a while before you get to eat/drink again. Go to the toilet and stretch your legs. I prewarn relatives I won't respond/field messages until afterwards because then you've not got to deal with expectations of others. I usually have about 15min between being told they're in recovery and seeing them I send a text at that point and then ignore any messages until I'm ready to answer. Take a book, water and snacks for the lots of sitting around.

Been to the cafe straight away! If they’re nil by mouth it’s frowned upon for you to eat and drink and I’ve always been starving!

they told me it would be a long time so I went to the cafe, I felt I'd barely got there and they phoned me to go back! I missed her coming back to her bed and wished I'd stayed closer (huge hospital so cafe was far away). Obviously the timing depends on the surgery, this was for a tonsillectomy. My anxiety went into overdrive because when they phoned me it was to say where was I, the surgeon wanted to talk to me. Seemed like hours to make it across the hospital to talk to him, but he only wanted to tell me that he'd had to remove 4 wobbly teeth and he didn't want me to be shocked when I saw her!

My DC was admitted to a private room before his op so I just sat there until they brought him back. It took seven hours. Longest seven hours of my life. I did make a few desperate dashes for coffee but was afraid if I wasn’t there I might miss something. DP went out for a number of walks (the hospital was in a nice area) as that helped calm his nerves. I think you just have to do whatever feels right for you. Best of luck.

No one will chat. Take headphones and read a book.

I was sent back to his room on the ward with a bleeper thing. This was for a ruptured appendix so unexpected but fairly routine. I can’t really remember what I did, just tried to distract myself. It actually wasn’t as bad as I would have imagined but I appreciate this wasn’t the most major of ops. Then a doctor came into the room to tell us it had gone fine, and the bleeper went off when he was settled in recovery.

There will be a chapel. I went there as I was anxious.

I went to get a croissant and OJ from the on-site cafe as that is what he said wanted when he woke up then I just sat in the recovery bay worrying till he came back!

Waited on the ward with my phone or grabbed something to eat. They were routine ortho ops so there wasn't any major worries.

I just cried in the waiting room (completely routine tiny op for glue ear) and drank tea.

There was no waiting area as such, so I just sat in the chair next to her bed on the ward until she was brought back. She was still asleep when coming back to the ward. It's a good idea to have things to do like cross words and things to take your mind off it but I found I couldn't do anything and sat in paralysed fear and exhaustion. Although, ours was after a week of being in hospital whilst they were trying to figure out what was wrong and she was a baby so awake every two hours for milk, along with the banging, noises and observations that come with being in hospital.

We went for breakfast. But I was heavily pregnant and we decided to not have breakfast in front of him as he couldn’t eat.
time passed really quickly. I think we were only in the waiting room about 15/20 mins before we were collected to go and calm him down.

Varies depending on the length of the surgery and whether the private or NHS hospital.

Private usually stay in their private room with a book or iPad.

NHS, went between the cafe and sitting by her bed. 7 hour op post Covid so only one parent allowed was the longest 7 hours of my life. They gave me a beeper so once she was in recovery I knew to be back.

There was a little parents lounge they gave us the code to. With a sofa and tea / coffee making facilities. I really appreciated it and when we went back for a check up I brought a couple of boxes of tea and biscuits one set for staff lounge and one for parents.

It was late at night. I sat in the parents's room and another mum came in who had a baby that had a serious illness and had been in various hospitals for months. She had quite broken English but was very chatty and wanted to tell me about her situation. She was really positive although she said she was lonely. 😢. Took my mind of worrying and put it into perspective as my son was just having his appendix out.

Went for lunch.

NBM children’s ward, we’d had to skip breakfast and I was breastfeeding so it was fairly important I kept the calories going. I was back to the ward before they brought him round so he could nurse pretty much immediately

Sat by the river near the hospital and did some knitting and colouring. I didn’t want to be far away and so walking didn’t feel like an option but needed to keep my minds and hands occupied.

DS had a very minor op at age 10 and I surprised myself by having a cry when I left him once they'd put him to sleep. I hadnt been slightly nervous before, and nor was he, but it was very strange leaving him in the care of others, even though they were the professionals, when he was in such a vulnerable state.

Once I'd had a cry, I went to get some food as I hadn't eaten while he was NBM. I also went to got him some food for when he woke up.

I went to recovery when they called and he was very groggy and tearful. He was sleepy for a while and then soon came round