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Daughter embarrassing isssue

67 replies

Bethany34w · 02/09/2024 17:08

I have a 13 year old I'm getting a little concerned, never had any issues arise like this before, she us currently unwell has a slight fever for a few days but what's concerning me she has diahrea but she's not making it to the toilet in time, maybe I'm being completely wrong but she just seems a little old for this to be a recurring issue, I am struggling to hide my frustration a little as I know she isn't well but she just expects me to clean her up, I feel like she needs to use her initiative and come up with a solution rather than keep pooing herself then just expecting me to deal with it. Also she's not giving much info other than " I just don't feel good"

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Garlicandchilli · 02/09/2024 17:12

How long has this been going on? If it’s sudden then she may very well have a stomach bug that she finds it difficult to get to the loo.
At 13 thought she’s well enough to jump in the shower.
Could you give her a large sanitary pad to pop into her underwear to help save her clothes?

Make sure she’s drinking plenty and use rehydration sachets if the diahorrea is frequent. These things don’t usually last long.
Try and get her to eat small amount, dry toast, banana, some rice. Hope shes well soon, bless her. She’s probably not enjoying this either!

Octavia64 · 02/09/2024 17:14

If this is happening over only hours or a couple of days it could easily be a stomach bug and many adults basically live on the toilet when they have one,

If we're talking weeks or months then she needs to seek medical attention.

OrlandointheWilderness · 02/09/2024 17:15

Well I suspect you need to be far more worried about her actual health and far less frustrated about the imposition on you! A 13 year old having frequent diarrhoea that happens with little warning and causes accidents is not normal, and she is telling you she feels ill. She needs a doctor, not to come up with a solution herself.
Really. God, poor bloody lass.

longdistanceclaraclara · 02/09/2024 17:16

Wow. Are you not concerned about her health? No one is shitting themselves for fun.

Itsdefinitelytimeforanamechange · 02/09/2024 17:18

She needs to wear some sanitary wear or tena pants asap to help with the clear up but my first concern would be looking into the issue to check nothing is urgently going on

OldTinHat · 02/09/2024 17:31

Is she constipated and leaking?

Get her a GPs appointment.

Bethany34w · 02/09/2024 17:43

Hi thanks for all the advice,

This is the second day now this has been happening,
I understand she is not well I just gathered at 13 she is old enough to take herself to the shower and deal with any soiling accidents herself. Instead she just shouts for me and when every so often I encourage her to visit the toilet and try to go as to prevent an accident she doesn't even bother just lays there.

She is not constipated and I checked her underwear and no sign of leakage

Gonna ring gp now

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GoadyMcBigot · 02/09/2024 17:47

glad you are phoning the GP. You really do need to prioritise your daughter’s health over your convenience. Your poor daughter. She must be mortified and frightened as well as feeling unwell. I hope she gets seen quickly and that you maybe do a little reflection for your daughter’s sake.

FacingTheWall · 02/09/2024 17:49

It just sounds like she has a stomach bug and will be better in a couple of days. However, at 13, she shouldn’t need you to be cleaning her up, she’s capable of that herself unless she’s too weak to do anything for herself.

ChipsCheeseAndGravey · 02/09/2024 17:54

A couple of years ago I had a violent case of the shits. I basically sat on the toilet for most of the day because I’d have for sure shit myself if. I agree she is old enough to clean herself up and look after herself, but sometimes when you’re sick you just want someone to look after you and do all the disgusting stuff for you. When people get sick they sometimes regress a bit. She is only 13 so I would cut her some slack, but it is definitely fucking mining. A bad case of the shits can be scary as silly as it sounds.

MushMonster · 02/09/2024 17:56

You say she had a fever for a few days. Did you take her to the doctor for that? Now diahrrea. She, in the best case, has an stomach bug like intestinal flu or covid. But she could have something else. I would expect her to clean herself and live in the toilet indeed, but if she is not doing so, this could be a clear sign of the degree of weakness this is inflicting on her. Just take her to the doctor asap.

Bethany34w · 02/09/2024 18:08

I spoke to gp but they seemed unconcerned as it's not been going more than 48 hours. I am to call back If she gets worse or no improvement after another 48 hours.

I don't know how to approach in the meantime i see some comments that I'm being a little harsh and some agreeing that at 13 you should be taking care of yourself, she is not so unwell as to she can't move she is definitely capable of getting herself to the bathroom she can move around the house fine and to the kitchen to get a drink and a snack

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tolerable · 02/09/2024 18:11

why is she snacking?

BarbaraVineFan · 02/09/2024 18:12

I'm not sure we should be replying to this one, folks

Bethany34w · 02/09/2024 18:15

Sorry I don't quite grasp the last 2 responses?

Why is she snacking? She has to eat no? She isn't eating much just a sandwich or a croissant and some water.

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RickyGervaislovesdogs · 02/09/2024 18:19

If she’s got diarrhoea it should be plain toast and water. Not a greasy croissant.
She doesn’t need a G.P yet.

At 13 there’s no way I’d want my mum cleaning me.

Mintgum · 02/09/2024 18:21

When you say she expects you to clean her up what do you mean.

Bethany34w · 02/09/2024 18:27

Right so no croissants and just plain toast? They are both bread no? Who on earth even eats clean toast. I think I will seek advice elsewhere as nothing really been helpful and some strange responses. Thanks anyway

OP posts:
LatteLady · 02/09/2024 18:27

OP, first 24 hrs of D&V, no solids just clear fluids, so basically water. Day 2 continue with the water, flat coke or flat lemonade, then it is white bland food... so toast, baked potato (no butter, fat or filling) or boiled rice by this point you will see if the "bug" has cleared the body and then slowly introduce other foods, ie buttered toast and marmite... croissants are not a great idea as if you have ever made them from scratch, you will know how much butter is used.

DoIWantTo · 02/09/2024 18:28

First name as a username?

Lavenderblossoms · 02/09/2024 18:29

Well guess what.

My 30 odd year old colleague got norovirus.

It was coming out both ends she told me and she also soiled herself. It's a nasty bug that causes projectile vomiting.

It could be any number of bugs. Good god, your poor daughter. It's the second day?

You need to get your priorities straight lady and don't embarrass your daughter over this.

It's not unusual to not make it on time with a bug or even with some bowl disorders!

Freedbagforlife · 02/09/2024 18:32

Croissant are made with a lot of butter, it is best to avoid dairy products. Plain rich tea biscuits or cornflakes may help if she wants to eat

tolerable · 02/09/2024 18:33

i guess i would stick to electrolytes after each bathroom explosion,and water, wouldnt particulrly eat(or want to). probably brat diet...sandwhich or croissant ambitious.
i am pathetic at ny sort of bodily grottyness,hit the deck at blood,.vomit and poo make me physically sick.
i doubt my teen would come out the bathroom ...but in the event of not mking it-id probably throw bin bag in and ny soiled stuff would be tied in there to dispose of. no way would i have to deal with it "hands on".tell her she has to do it herself.ill or not...

Bethany34w · 02/09/2024 18:33

Yeah she's been eating rich tea biscuits. Do I get some credit for that at least? I got one thing right it seems

OP posts:
DatingDinosaur · 02/09/2024 18:37

Bethany34w · 02/09/2024 18:27

Right so no croissants and just plain toast? They are both bread no? Who on earth even eats clean toast. I think I will seek advice elsewhere as nothing really been helpful and some strange responses. Thanks anyway

Because if it is a stomach bug she needs bland food, not greasy or high fat food which will make it worse.

Oh, and if she's not unwell enough to get a snack and a drink, hand her the cleaning stuff next time she asks you to clean up after her. Raise your own boundaries. She's letting you do it for her because you're not saying no!