Bedwetting in 11 year old.

[LovelyBath77]

DS1 has still not been dry at night unless on occasions, and is 11. DS2 is fine.

We've tried desmopressin at the lower and higher dose and it hasn't worked, now been told to stop it as it would have worked by now.

Didn't find the clinic very helpful, they said well it's not a hormone problem then so it must be around the bladder capacity and training the bladder, drinking more etc. We have been doing this already though. She said it's his responsibility now due to his age, but really it's not within his control.

Says they tried to get him to do bladder capacity measurements but he wouldn't.

Hmm, feeling a bit exasperated. Has anyone else had this and did anything work? He's just started at secondary school and it's pretty busy and even more tricky to encourage all the drinking etc. I will try though. He does get thirsty in the evening and trying to stop him drinking then as think this doesn't help.

Not as unusual as you think for his age group. About 1 in 20 I understand. There are alternatives to desmopressin if it isn't working for some reason. Recommend that you seek advice from paediatric urologist. Either get your GP to refer you to someone or book a consultation privately ( you can get details of fees in advance ) & check your health insurance if you have a family policy one.
Horrid for him and you're right to want to get help. I'm in north west and can recommend a clinic ussc by nephew if you pm me.

Thanks, would the paediatric urologist be different from the docs at the clinic I wonder, as we already have a referral there. We don't have private so would beed to be on the NHS.

I'm wondering about bladder training after reading a bit about this, and wondered about maybe trying it first. I actually think it's got worse since trying the meds as maybe being more relaxed about the drinking more in the day etc, maybe he's sort of relying on it rather than what we are doing otherwise. If that makes any sense.

Have you tried a bedwetting alarm? Alarms are recommended by NICE as 1st line treatment for bedwetting in under 19s. They cure bedwetting by developing the link between brain & bladder, by training the brain to recognise the feeling of a full bladder when asleep. The majority of children then learn to wake up by themselves before wetting and then finally are able to sleep through & hold on until morning.

Alarms are available on NHS in some areas - usually through enuresis clinics

We've just been to the enuresis clinic with my 8 year old DS. Had tried Desmopressin tablets, bed alarms etc. with no luck. Tablets just didn't work at all. Spoke to the lovely consultant who gave us charts/diaries to measure drinking/wee and advised to drink 1.7l water per day (spread out, 2 glasses at breakfast/2 at playtime/2 at lunch/2 in afternoon and last drink one and half hours before medicine/bed. She has prescribed desmopressin melts. I said, the medicine didn't work last time and she said that you have to work with the medicine and not just assume it will do all the work. So, you need to do the monitoring of drinks etc. as well as taking the medicine, not instead of. Is that what you were doing before?

I think that's good advice and think we were just thinking the meds should work and giving up as much on the other things. Coupled with it being summer holidays and away camping etc. I had a chat with him and he told me he sometimes does wake up needing to go to the loo but doesn't like the dark or the thought of waking us all up so goes back to sleep. So, I've given him a torch and reassured him that it's fine to get up etc. I also think the drinking more in the day and less in the evening helps too, so going to try these for now and see how we get on. Interestingly the first night without the tablets, he was dry but wet again last night.

Sorry, yes they have now put him on the list for an alarm but he told the lady he despises the alarm he tried before.Hmm

No real words of advice but just to let you know that both me and my younger brother were bed wetters at 11 and were both reliably dry by 13 / 14 (no medication or training really, other than reduced fluids etc). No discernible physical cause - seemed to be genetic as our father was the same as a child.

I did this too, stopped to about 12, I had some medicine that did stop me peeing mostly (tasted bloody awful) that may be what was mentioned up thread. I will swear up and down that I had super realistic dreams where I got up when to the bathroom and sat down on the loo, then woke up because of the feeling of peeing.

My brother still wets the bed but is in the process of stopping (he's but SN, been drugged to sleep, in nappies at night and no one tried to fix it until now because new council won't pay for nappies).

Ds stopped once puberty started, which I'd read could happen and it did. Wish I had other advice but nothing really worked.

DS is 10.5 and rarely dry. He now has an alarm as desmopressin wasn't doing much. I don't understand the reference to him not co-operating with the bladder capacity tests though- they were something we did at home - just wee into a bowl or jug and measure it at different times of the day? He should be able to hold 250 mls at this age, DS manages about half that. So he really has to work on drinking more over the day, and holding it in, as well as the alarm as he simply isn't waking on his own.

My 10 year old sleeps so soundly that the alarm doesn't wake him up (and he doesn't wake when wet). I have to sleep in his room and wake him when the alarm goes off. He's dry about 50% of the time. This thread is reminding me to persevere more with the drinking though.

Yes we think this is hereditary too as DH was not dry until a teen. With the measuring etc he just refuses and gets funny about it, embarrassed i suppose. i don't think it helps that his 8 year old sibling is fine.

DD1 has no nerve endings in her bladder and so was wet for many years - right up until she left home. Alarms didn't work for her; I could have smothered her in her sleep and she wouldn't have struggled, she slept so deeply. However, not cooperating with the bladder tests is something you need to talk to your DS about. How does he expect to gain control if he won't do as he is asked? I know what an horrendous strain this is, so persevere in seeing a urologist and tell him to cooperate with the tests. Perhaps the threat of you going to oversee the tests as well might work? Either way, if he doesn't cooperate, he won't see any improvement.

Does he have any daytime symptoms eg urgency, frequency, dribbling etc. If so adding in another medication to stabilse the bladder can sometimes help.

I got really pissed off with the community paediatrician banging on about drinking all the time to stretch the bladder as we were doing that and it obviously wasn't helping. In the end we paid privately to see a paediatric urologist and had a scan to ensure there were no underlying problems with the bladder/kidneys and to check the bladder was emptying properly.

When dd eventually became dry it literally seemed to happen overnight. It was horrible for her and the emotional affects are awful.

Have you contacted ERIC? They have an advice line where you could have a chat with someone. Good luck.

Thanks no he doesn't have any daytime problems. So it just cleared up overnight in the end? I will maybe try that helpline. I think the problem isn't helped as my husband had a difficult time of it with tests, star sheets, alarms etc in the 70s and that is rubbing off on my son. Not sure. He's of an age where it's a bit embarrassing and he's quite sensitive rather than just not complying.

Lots of reassurance needed for your DS and yes, a paediatric urologist is different. Just tell your GP you want the referral and they will do it for you.
My DS says it helped not to over medicalise the problem with alarms etc(consultant didn't put much store on them) and routine routine routine is key. No drinks for 1.5hrs before bed, wee, take meds, bed (SN used to read for about 15 mins as found he needed to go again - boys don't always empty fully ( who knew!)) Lights out. DS swears by Soak and Sleeps mattress protectors - they're absorbent but have waterproof backing. She had 3 on the go at one time -one on bed, one in airing cupboard and 1 in wash. After 18 months treatment DN was sorted

What Queen said but don't underestimate the embarrassment factor. DS said that matter of fact approach and kindness of (male) consultant helped DN enormously as did attitude of staff at his clinic. Your DS might respond better in a different environment n which he'll be sensitively treated. I suspect tha the more you push him the more he'll dig his heels in, it's pretty humiliating for him (in he eyes) and intravenous after all. Good luck

Good grief! Not intravenous, invasive

Thanks. GP is a bit if a dragon and think may feel we've already had this referral and that's enough, but will try. I will have a look at those sheets, just now we have some washable mattress protectors from John Lewis. Just washed the duvet and sheets again today, as i do every day (sigh)

Ok, he has a school residential trip in a couple of weeks, and won't wear any pyjama pants type things, but I've seen these "Pjama" trousers online, they are quite expensive though. Has anyone tried them?

My nephew was bedwetting at 13 and was referred to a Psychologist at CAMHs which worked a treat.

If you ask for the referral then the GP HAS to make it for you. If you're hitting a brick wall and can do it , self refer and pay for the first appointment then once you're 'on the books' go back to GPs bring them up to speed and get them to refer you for future care.

Talk to his school before the residential as they'll be sympathetic. They have to know anyway if he's taking meds. DS said contingency plans were put in place for DS in similar situation. In two person room with a friend, nearest to teachers room ( who knew and who handled everyones meds on trip), teachers aware of routine, spare bedding and pjs to hand for quick change just in case. It was fine.

DS1 (yr6) has a school residential in a couple of months, which I'm dreading. He will wear pyjama pants though - hopefully can do so discreetly. Teacher says he won't be the only one - they have 3 or 4 every year, and a system of alerting the teacher if they have had an accident so that the bed can be changed while everyone has breakfast. She suggested getting several pairs of the same pyjamas so that if some needs changing, it will still look like the same pair.

Hi Lovely Bath 77,

I was just wondering how your ds got on with his bed wetting

Our ds (11 y.o) still wets most of the time, we have been using the combination of Huggies Pyjama Pants and bed mats for a while, they work but they are expensive since we need at least one pack of each per week.

The urologist said that his bladder can hold about 220 mls.

His friends don’t know about his bed wetting but that has not stopped him from going to sleepovers, we just cover up the pyjama pants with underwear and an onsie.

Did your ds just stop or is he still struggling to get dry?

He wants to stop wetting the bed so we might just start using the bed mats on top of the sheet (saves on washing).

I look forward to hearing from you,
Charolette.