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DS has cancer...

21 replies

PufflesMC · 30/01/2016 21:07

Sorry, I'm posting this in 2 places now! I have been sent here, so anyone with experience, would be lovely (obviously not lovely, but helpful)...

I just really need some support... I gave birth to twin boys, 2 weeks ago, who are still nameless. DS is 9 and a half - he was diagnosed with AML, 9 months ago, he is getting through it like such a trooper, but I know he is struggling. DH works too much, but refuses to stop, so I'm doing it all by myself. Sorry this isn't much info, just need some support sad

Thank you x

OP posts:
Squashybanana · 30/01/2016 21:16

Oh poor you what a lot on your plate! How about DS gets to choose a middle name for each brother ? This might help him feel close to the twins and will be special for all of them. Men, I think sometimes just need telling what you need. Tell him, for example, that you need him home by 5:30 2 nights a week to help with dinner-bath- bed and give older DS some one on one time, for example...or whatever you need. I hope your DS is better soon, fuck cancer x

Squashybanana · 30/01/2016 21:21

Giving each brother a name would be a gift from their big brother that will be with them for all their lives, whatever happens. Hopefully it will serve to remind him when he is a teenager and they are irritating snotty 5 year olds that he had an important role when they were babies!

PufflesMC · 30/01/2016 21:22

Squashy - thank you and yes, that's a great idea! I'll make sure to ask him what names he loves :) I'll try with DH, but he's a suborn thing! x

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Squashybanana · 30/01/2016 21:32

Yes you may have to lay down ground rules or the twins might end up as, for example, 'Dylan Poophead' and 'George Bumface' :)

Squashybanana · 30/01/2016 21:33

Will you come back and update us if he chooses names?

PufflesMC · 30/01/2016 22:51

DS really likes Jacob and Lucas (Jake and Luke) and I'm liking them atm :)

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nocoolnamesleft · 30/01/2016 22:55

Your DS has great taste (I love traditional names). Do you think your DH is working so much because he really feels he has to (I do realise that having a child with such a significant illness can have a lot of hidden costs...let alone twins), or because it's actually the easy option, as he can escape from the stresses of everyday care?

user7755 · 30/01/2016 22:56

Great names (you should let him loose on the name boards on here, sounds like he is much more sensible than lots of us mums!).

I have no words of advice, just wanted to give you Flowers

PufflesMC · 30/01/2016 23:03

nocoolnamesleft - I think it's a bit of both? He had PTSD with DS1 and now wants to stay away, I think, but also wants to work for the money - I really would rather he stopped for a bit and I used some savings, but he's having none of it :(

user - I'm sure he would love that Grin - he likes to have a good read of our baby name book!! Thank you, lovely x

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PufflesMC · 01/02/2016 00:27

Just wanted to say, our twins are now named: Aidan Lucas and Elliot Jacob :)

OP posts:
dratsea · 01/02/2016 07:44

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

tantalisingduck · 01/02/2016 09:15

Surely you did not really mean to post that dratsea. Not helpful and not accurate either.

lalamumto3 · 01/02/2016 09:21

Lovely names, I hope you are getting some support. I just wanted to mention that there are some benefits that you will be entitled to such as DLA, it can help with those extra costs.
Best wishes Flowers

Caravanoflove · 01/02/2016 09:22

Dratsea eh?!

misspym · 01/02/2016 09:28

Lovely names. So sorry to hear about your DS.

dratsea · 01/02/2016 10:13

Caravan "eh?!" Your problem my name or my post? Do pm if interested, else report my post. I was trying to offer OP support , I have suggested that what was an awful diagnosis may not be so bad with modern chemo, but as has been found and was posted by Puffles still seriously rough on DS.

Direct to OP: Puffles Does he like Cake, offered him in abundance from me.

Mumblechum1 · 01/02/2016 10:35

Dratsea's post was a classic punctuation fail! I think she was trying to be reassuring but the meaning was lost.

OP, I love the twins' names and have everything crossed that your DS will be absolutely fine.

I agree with others that you should find out about what help may be available. McMillan are a good source of info on benefits etc.

dratsea · 01/02/2016 10:46

Mumble Thanks

GingerNutRiskIt · 01/02/2016 11:02

OP their names are beautiful. You have 3 very special boys there. Keep strong.

PufflesMC · 01/02/2016 14:02

Thank you all so much.

I didn't see your post, it was deleted too quick...

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Squashybanana · 01/02/2016 18:07

Oh he did a great job! As did you and dh with first names. Well done and I hope DS is better soon x

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