How to get teenager to read

[123teenagerfood]

I'm a prolific reader, from birth. My husband reads 2 books a year. My son sees me reading all the time, he is exposed to books on a daily basis, we read to him every night and loved it as a young child. He has read a number of classics and modern classics, I found him reading Sylvia Plath poems the other day. But unless I suggest a book or ask him what he would like to read, he just doesn't bother. He is currently reading We Have Always Lived in the Castle and says he likes it. How can I cultivate a love of reading? We have a library at home, he generally chills in it, he is well read but only as I set out books and he chooses. We go to the library and he gets books as well. Maybe I am asking too much?

Finding books that inspire and intrigue your DS, perhaps a kindle or if not maybe a trip out to a bookshop. (Waterstones)..... To me, that sounds like fun, maybe he just needs to see what is out there.

Some people just aren't into fiction, doesn't mean they're not well rounded individuals.
Some people like various different types of nonfiction books, others might prefer to listen to podcasts or audio books or watch content rather than read.

I don't know but it really made me smile reading 'I'm a prolific reader, from birth' 😂😊

See if he would like information books about things he is into.

A reader from birth eh? That's some talent. In all seriousness though, some kids just don't enjoy reading. I read constantly, DS doesn't. He still flew through his GCSEs so it doesn't really matter. He's still really clever, he's just more into numbers than words.

How old is your teenager? Do you let him choose books completely by himself, or only from those “you have set out free him” ? Sylvia Plath seems an unusual choice for a teenage boy.
Does he like non fiction? Something light and fun eg Guinness Book of Records, autobiographies of people he admires - pop stars, sportspeople etc? Books about gaming, IT, ? Terry Pratchett Discworld series, Philip Pullman Dark Materials, or even Tolkien?
Even if not particularly well written or worthy the entertainment value might spark more of an interest in books and reading.

He is 14, I take him to the library and bookshops, he's just not really interested. I've suggested books around subjects he likes, he is maths and science minded. I do let him choose. He has read some TP, Pullman, Harry Potter and Tolkien, he just seems a bit 'meh' about books. Sylvia Plath was just lying around and he had picked it up out of interest.

Just emphasising my love of reading. He is really clever, a straight A student in all subjects and has won student of the year 3 years running. His teachers comment on how well read he is at parents evening, I just don't get it.

Hi OP, my age 14 son is similar. High achieving academically esp in maths, but also in English, despite seemingly not reading apart from the set books at school…I also don’t get it! Seems a bit unfair. Like you, I’m a big reader (English lit degree etc).

However, this summer he found a series he loved and he’s had his nose in those books for the past few weeks - hoovering them up.

tbf he's done this occasionally in the past (eg Harry Potter). Seems to me that a series is the way forward with him, and perhaps many of the more mathsy type /non-readery boys?

as far as I’m concerned I don’t care what the series even is, I’m just happy he is reading.

Fwiw it’s historical fiction that he’s reading atm - but not high brow or even anything classic.

PS My husband (also a reader) did say he only really clicked with reading around 14, so this proves to me it (the reading bug) can happen at any age! And maybe it’s yet to happen with your son. But sounds like you’re doing all the right things to allow it to happen!

Just emphasising my love of reading. He is really clever, a straight A student in all subjects and has won student of the year 3 years running. His teachers comment on how well read he is at parents evening, I just don't get it.

What is there to 'get'? He's doing great, he's just not the same as you!

I used to read voraciously (not so much nowadays). DH reads (or now because of eyesight mostly listens) widely but nearly all nonfiction. DD - simply never much liked reading, though she loved being read to into her teens, end enjoyed various factual books, 'fun maths' type of things. She's a Cambridge graduate with a wide range of interests, as far as I can see she doesn't read much now except a bit of detective fiction. I used to fret about her not reading ... I really shouldn't have!

I think some people just aren't readers tbh and that's OK. My oldest isn't a big book person, though I read constantly. They've just done fabulously in GCSEs without being into reading so I don't push it.

You can't force someone to like reading. Just let him know you can get him books if he wants them.

Dd read non-stop from when she learnt in school until around age 10-11. She'd be the kid with five books on the go at once. She walked around the house with a book in hand. Asked for book tokens for Xmas presents. Read the entire Harry Potter series during lockdown. Left primary school with a reading age of 17. Then she just stopped.

We tried taking screens away, incentivising her, making books available, trips to book shops (which she used to love) etc. Didn't work.

She does her homework and is in top sets. I'm content with that for now.

I'd have said the OPs DS is a reader, compared to the majority of other teens!

You've provided abundant 'food' OP, but his appetites aren't the same as yours. Maybe you're missing out on some of the other things he prefers to spend his time on?

I love reading but you can't force people to be what you have decided for them

How to get teenager to read....?
"He's is currently reading We have always lived in the castle and says he likes it".
So he is reading....you don't need to get him to read!!!

What about audio books or podcasts? I don't know many teenagers into reading but I do know plenty who listen to podcasts.

My 13yo hates reading, always has. His dad and I both studied literature to masters level, also a house full of books. Nothing has been off-limits to him. Zero interest in Harry Potter or anything in alternative universes (Discworld, for example). But is currently devouring the graphics novels of The Walking Dead! (Not watching the series).
Meh. If he's reading, he's reading.
Since his birth I can't stomach fiction,weirdly. So it's history for me. I'm reading The Fatal Shore as I remember my mum had it in hard back and I have a sibling in Australia. I've read DS some interesting excerpts, and maybe when he's 40-something, he'll read it himself.

Unfortunately, your OP reads like a faux humblebrag.

I think you need to take a step back and appreciate what sounds like a fantastic young man.

My DD never read much at all until she was 24/25 - now she reads a lot and a massive variety.

As with all teen things - the more you push, the more likely he is to not want to do it.

Thanks, I think i just had visions of us discussing reading, reading side by side etc. He is a fabulous son. I should probably just accept he has other talents and interest.

Put a serious time limit on his mobile, the TV and any other electronics. That will result in a lot more time to kill which he might hopefully with reading.

You have a library? A library in your home? When can I come to stay?

Have you tried journaling your books? It might be something he would like or you could do a joint one with suggestions for each other to read.

I feel your pain, OP. I'm an avid reader and I hoped that my three DC would be the same. I read to them a lot when they were small, I take them to bookshops and we have loads of books in the house. They're teens now and they all read a bit, but none of them love it the way I do. I do think it's partly to do with phones, they have a lot more distractions than we used to.

You've provided an opportunity to read avidly, but he's not taking up this opportunity to the extent that you would like him to.

Suppose he chooses to do more reading than he currently is, that necessarily means also choosing to do less of something that he's currently doing. How is he choosing to spend his time? What would he be giving up or deprioritising to get through the volume of reading you would like him to? By the way, it sounds like he's doing pretty well on the back of how he's choosing to spend his time - student of the year 3 times?

Suppose he did lots of reading, but in a slightly different way than you'd imagined - instead of discussing reading with you, and reading side by side with you, he chose to read alone in his room, and became an avid booktok-er. How would you feel about that?

The next bit may sound harsh (sorry....):

It's not a child's responsibility to become the person that one of their parents once imagined they would become.

He is a fabulous son. He has other interests. He is well on the way to becoming his own, fabulous, adult self.

He sounds like a fine lad. Enjoy him.

Will he let you read to him? I read to my teenagers at that age - things like Frankenstein, 1984, Catcher in the Rye and Clockwork Orange. It meant we could discuss the books as we read them and they were exposed to books they wouldn’t have read otherwise (they didn’t read on their own though).

Me too - read to her since she was a week old and she always used to love story time. Is a good reader but chooses not to do it unless it is a certain series that she will binge read. Like you say, too many distractions now.