Which toddler books do you loathe?

[LiverpoolMummy89]

I asked for books for DD2 for Christmas and got some lovely ones that she enjoys but there’s one I absolutely hate - Dear Zoo. I know it’s one of the more well known ones but the fact that the ungrateful little kid sends back all the animals back and gets a perfect puppy at the end grinds my gears 😂

Are there any other books to stay clear of? This is a light hearted thread btw

I'm currently hating The Tickle Book, mainly because I cannot work out what order the last page goes in. Also because I don't like being tickled and my son insists on tickling me on particular pages.

To get the rhythm of Going on a Bear Hunt you need to watch a video of Michael Rosen reciting it. He's just brilliant.

I would love recommendations of nice storybooks for four year olds that aren't Julia Donaldson and also aren't to do with poo or farts.

You need to read Tabby McTat in 6/8 time (so to speak). Then it works. (But still pisses me off because it's 'male characters go on hero's journey while Sock waits meekly at home'. Stick Man is similar. And the characters in The Gruffalo all being male has always wound me up, and I always made the owl female).

The Highway Rat is a pastiche of the poem The Highwayman (famously recited by Anne of Green Gables in the original film/series IIRC).

I love the Going to Bed Book by Sandra Boynton, but it always disappointed me that her Happy Hippo, Angry Duck is so negative and exclusionary about the poor duck

Sharing the hate for Thomas (the engines are downtrodden cogs of capitalism) and the Mr Men (verbose and often vindictive). I love Judith Kerr's style and writing, and Mog is an incredibly well-observed character, but her images of family life are very sexist - Mrs Thomas always flapping around cleaning and Mr Thomas having 'his chair'.

Big fan of Dr Seuss - The Cat in the Hat is very clever. We also loved Meg and Mog. And Winnie the Witch has really grown on me.

William Bee's Wonderful World of Trucks - fml I know this by heart.

Winnie the Pooh and Mr Men. DS wanted desperately to enjoy Winnie the Pooh, and keeps making me read them to him in the hope that we will find one in the series that makes sense. They were written for nostalgic adults, not kids.

He did quite like Mr Happy meeting Mr Unhappy, but he was completely freaked out by Mr Tickle.

Recommendations for 4yo:

Harold and the Purple Crayon
Katie Morag stories
Bob Graham (Queenie the Bantam, How to Heal a Broken Wing, This is Our House)
The Puffin Book of Five-Minute Stories is lovely, and I think still in print
The Teddybears books by Susanna Gretz are charmingly retro
Burglar Bill/Cops and Robbers by the Ahlbergs
A House is a House for Me

Percy, Sarah and Bill? (Going on memory here I could have got that very wrong 😂). My older two loved it, I used to think yeah just leave the kids alone on a branch, in the dark, what could go wrong? And have the youngest one in tears with no explanation, relying on young siblings to act as care givers.
Dear zoo was given by my MIL for each child when they hit 1 or 2. Each child loved it and would want it to be read every single fucking evening.

I know the hungry Caterpillar off by heart. I still like it.

We’re going on a bear hunt - I always added “Poor bear! They woke him up and then ran away. That’s not very nice. Poor bear!”

Guess how much I love you as it’s overly competitive and the baby hare is never going to win.

Tea time in space, given away as its just boring, however my 4 year old loves our very old Topsy and Tim books and Rosie and Jim books, I still have my favourite kids book Desmond the dinosaur which I loved as a child!

For classic picturebooks, reasonably available:

• Winnie the Witch (some are better than others but the best are fun and seem to go down well).
• Judith Kerr, Katinka's Tail.
• Dr Seuss, 'The Lorax'
• Try 'The Magic Paintbrush'. It is Donaldson, but not her usual fare.

More off the beaten track

• Donald Hall, The Ox-Cart Man (very old-fashioned, but very gentle).
• Peter Bently, Cats Ahoy
• Ditto, Octopus Shocktopus
• Gail E. Hailey, A Story, A Story
• Mac Barnett, Extra Yarn (TBF DD mostly liked this because we knit and she liked the idea).

(I feel as if there should be more but DD's asleep and I am not going to browse her bookshelves now! ).

Ooh, yes, Katie Morag! And I love the Cops and the Robbers though I think DP never really approved of it.

Katinka's Tail is lovely. I always felt 4 was a tiny bit young for the Lorax - mine loved Fox in Socks at that age (and it's still much-quoted years on, incl by the teens) and my 7yo still enjoys The Sleep Book.

Milly-Molly-Mandy and the Mary Kate stories are lovely gentle longer ones to read at that age, ditto The Owl who was Afraid of the Dark.

Bear Party is fun (I always made 'the wise old bear who lived at the top of the tallest eucalyptus tree' female in that one)

I love Judith Kerr's style and writing, and Mog is an incredibly well-observed character, but her images of family life are very sexist - Mrs Thomas always flapping around cleaning and Mr Thomas having 'his chair'.

It'll blow your mind, then, that the mum in Tiger Who Came For Tea exists in a polyamorous relationship with two different men.

(Not really. Judith Kerr admitted she was always surprised readers couldn't see the two 'dad' figures are based on drawings from two different men. I admit, I can't tell!).

I feel the same about Shirley Hughes and the (lovely) Alfie books. How come Alfie's dad doesn't even notice his shoes are on the wrong feet, and it's left to poor mum?! But it was decades ago.

Re Tiger - I can't tell either. What bothers me about that book, illustration-wise, is the scene where Sophie and her mummy tell Daddy about the tiger - he is a absolutely enormous sitting in his chair and the two female figures standing next to it are tiny in comparison.

I do like the fact that it's Debbie that Mog has a special bond with in the Mog books.

I think Alfie would be about my age now if he were real. I guess the sexism is a bit inescapable, but there are a couple of scenes that offset it a bit IIRC. And Alfie is sometimes a very observant big brother.

OMG I felt exactly the same - we ended up with two copies and both went to the charity shop!

A great book- the day the crayons quit . Read over and over again, and laughed at each time!

Most of the JD ones fit to "5 little ducks" or "he ain't gonna jump no more"

We got a box set, but I binned that one!

And have you ever taken a look at dad's facial expression on that page as his wife and child describe their experience? 😂

That’s one of my favourites - I can see why it would turn a stomach though.

I’ve read the one about a daughter mouse being forced into an arranged marriage with the most powerful thing in the world, they start with the sun, then clouds, then the wind and a wall, before finally finding out a mouse is stronger than a wall. I think it’s a really bad retelling of an old story as I have another about a stone cutter who goes through a similar journey of finding out he’s actually strong.

Not that knowing that makes me feel any more inclined to sympathise with batshit mouse dad. His poor daughter.

Fox’s Socks - julia donaldson
Poor old fox has lost his socks but on the first page there’s a chest which to me looks like it has a sock in it.
And then at the end when he actually finds his sock, it’s on a puppet’s head and looks nothing like a bloomin sock!
DD thinks it’s a hat!
Rubbish!

Fox’s socks does have the benefit of being really short though!

@Holliejollie22 very true!

Scarecrow’s wedding, shows a total lack of consent and the male forcing himself on the female, totally gross. Yet MIL insists it’s her favourite and constantly tells DC this even though I binned the copy she gave us and told her why totally disagree with it 😤

How do scarf and giraffe not rhyme?!! First time I've heard this. Are you all saying scarf to rhyme with caff (instead of laugh, though I guess some people say laugh to rhyme with laff??) or something?! 🤣