Which toddler books do you loathe?

[LiverpoolMummy89]

I asked for books for DD2 for Christmas and got some lovely ones that she enjoys but there’s one I absolutely hate - Dear Zoo. I know it’s one of the more well known ones but the fact that the ungrateful little kid sends back all the animals back and gets a perfect puppy at the end grinds my gears 😂

Are there any other books to stay clear of? This is a light hearted thread btw

"Guess How much I love You".

If Little Nutbrown Hare said he was going to Tenerife Big Nutbrown Hare would be going to Elevenerife. Smug prick.

Any books that go on and on about how great Daddy is because he does basic parenting tasks.

And why is his sister such a nasty cow? Harry's always taken away to settle.down but Sam never seems to be told off

The Mole Who Knew It Was None of his Business too. I had to read it in playgroup. The kids loved it. It made me feel vaguely sick.

Hahahaha I've always said exactly the same about Dear Zoo OP 😂 I can't stand topsy and Tim.... so sexist 🙈

I don't understand why baby and toddler books have cartoon illustrations of animals and insects in them "this is a caterpillar" etc.

No it bloody isn't! Caterpillars don't smile at you and have human mouths. Why don't animal picture books have photographs of the creatures in them anymore?

Old books from my childhood do (70s)

@SarahAndQuack DP is looking at me funny now, as I try to work out how 'nah' and 'car' don't rhyme!

😂 they definitely don't in my Scottish accent with our rolled Reds 😂

Rolled Rs... bloody autocorrect!

On the way home!! She meets 10 people!! It goes on forever

Now I am trying to roll my r. DP definitely thinks I've lost the plot.

THIS!
I have gotten rid of this book as it drove me absolutely mad!

@DillDanding oh no no no......What Do People Do All Day is one of the greatest books ever written.
Absolute classic. I love that book so much 😍

Little Rabbit Fucking Foo Foo. DS brought that book home from school every week for a year when he was in Reception, I am stillscarred from reading it word perfect (and he's 31 this year).

I have just this minute finished reading little rabbit foo foo riding through the forest scopping up the wriggly worms and bopping them on the head. Bloody love that book. Hate all julia Donaldson, hate thomas tank engine, hate mister men (despite loving them as a child)

Agree with pp that some kids books did not age well. Enid Blyton was a keen favourite of mine as a child, I'm not white, but didn't see anything wrong aged 8 or 9. Now I cringe.

Any by Tom Fletcher. They are bloody awful.

Personally, I don't understand the popularity of Julia Donalson or Roald Dahl. There's a couple from each that I don't mind but most don't appeal.
The Tiger that came to tea (even though I love When Hilter Stole Pink Rabbit by the same author).
We're going on a bear hunt. I wish the bear would just eat them before they set off on their bloody hunt!
Mr Men / Little Miss.
Rainbow Faries
Thomas the Tank.

The frog being to jumpy in Dear Zoo ruins it for me. You wouldn’t use that in a sentence, you’d say “the frog jumped too much” but the author wanted a frog and shoehorned an adjective into the page. I’ve bottled this up for a long time!

*too (the shame)

The flip flap books by axel scheffler are incredibly tedious. DM bought several of them for DC and I am sick of them. I managed the rhyme in tabby mctat but I cant work out the rhythm in The Highway Rat, where it says "I am a rat of the highway the highway the highway".

Agree about dickhead nutbrown hare. It's a shame because the pictures a lovely, he is just a knob. Also the You Choose book, way too exciting for bedtime and DS just picks the the ugly duckling every time.

The Axel Scheffler "bedtime/Christmas bear" books. Felt like they were trying too hard to be quirky and fun, so didn't scan and were clunky and made me eyeroll, hard.

Love most JD (esp Tabby McTat! How can you not get the rhythm of it???) but hate the Scarecrow's Wedding, horrible characters and the references to smoking felt quite grim in a children's book.

Mr Men and Little Miss books make me want to bang my head against the wall. They are so boring.

Glad I'm not alone disliking MrMen books.
I wasn't a fan of Harry and Dinosaurs either.

But the things l loathed most was a Disney Cars book, it went on and on for every. Never buy any sort of book based on a film. Cartoon ones are bad but films are 100x worse.

Smeds & the smoos is bloody awful, derivative, lazy and trite.
fairytale hairdresser. That goes for a holiday & appears like magic every now again. Except I’ve sent it on a holiday from whence I cannot retrieve it. Might have to try again tomorrow.
the Oi books after the first several hundred reads.
Any book with black writing on a dark coloured page.

love Jon klassen.

The Crocodile under the bed is awful.

Smeds & the smoos is bloody awful, derivative, lazy and trite.

Really?! I mean, fair enough, hate what you hate, but what's so derivative/lazy?

Another vote for Guess How Much I Love You. I hate the competitive twat daddy hare.

I like the Crocodile Under the Bed though. And scarf and giraffe rhyme for me so I like that one too!