Board title

[HeiXiong]

This board was created by a great discussion on the site stuff board.

the scope of the board was a welcoming space for mumsnetters without children (both childfree and childless) to share life experiences.

Whilst it’s great we have a board I’m baffled as to why childless posters have not been included in the board they also lobbied for. Not only is the board clearly labelled as for the childfree, but the name of the board is a pretty cruel pun for any posters struggling to adjust to life without children.

can we please have the “mumsnetters without children” board we asked for?

I thought that might be a bit long but see other sections with similarly long names

🤣 Sorry but it's brilliant.

I have to agree 🤭

I initially thought it was brilliant then I thought actually that's going to sting for some people

Are you childless not by choice?

don’t you think it might be nice to support those who are?

Exactly ‘you’re not a mum even though you desperately wanted to be 😂’

hilarious 🙄

Well it may be 'brilliant' but it's also undoubtedly cruel if the board is meant - and it seems it is - to include and welcome women who wanted children and haven't been able to have them, and also presumably women whose children have died either before birth or after.
Not the subject of puns, is it?

Exactly. @MNHQ Please consider the experiences of the posters you are mocking

I was childless not by choice now happily childfree, I am happy with MumsNotbut also happy to change it if that’s what people want.

It does feel a bit divisive!

Mumsnet is beyond a parenting board anyway, they might as well rebrand the whole thing. Most posts aren't about kids.

I’m childfree by choice and thought it was funny - until someone pointed out the very obvious point that it is or could be hurtful to people who may not be as content with their status as I am. How lucky I am that wasn’t a consideration for me.

Name needs to change.

Perhaps I'm missing the point of the board. You can post on any board you like currently that all have specific topics. I don't see how those who suffered devastating fertility struggles will want to discuss it with those who don't like
kids very much and simply chose to not have them.

Those who have suffered devastating infertility may want to discuss how they manage their wills/inheritance, power of attorney, life without children or any other topic relevant to all of us without the continued reminder of ‘haha! You’re not a mum’

I think I was the first to suggest the name and it kinda stuck. I am infertile but I absolutely take the point that it can be upsetting and am more than happy for it to be changed to avoid that. I want this to be a nice inclusive space.

I’m childfree by choice and I think Mumsnot is clever & witty. Good for whoever came up with it. 🙌

Obviously, if it genuinely offends some people, it could be changed.

Yes me too. It won't hurt anyone if it's changed but will continue to hurt some people if it remains the same.

It doesn’t offend. It hurts.

well theres already a thread in bereavement about the name
https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/bereavement/4822642-a-mum-or-not

Love it.

Because childfree and childless people share many of the same issues and because quite frankly over the years childfree women have been far bigger supporters of childless women in the But you arent a mum thread, than many other posters.

We aren't here to discuss fertility struggles. We are here to discuss life after fertility struggles. I wonder if maybe you didnt read the thread on site stuff to get the board set up? It might be worth putting a link to it on this thread if anyones confused where its come from

I would add the link myself but im on my stupid little phone on a train and im visually impaired so posting is challenging as it is!!

Actually I'm child free not by choice and even though I saw the funny side. I actually can see how it would hit a nerve.

Yeah, that makes me feel terrible.

@MNHQ, can we please change the name of the board to Mumsnetters without children? I think this name was down to me and the last thing I’d ever want to do is cause people to be driven away from it bedside of me making a thoughtless pun.

Thank you.

I'm childless not by choice. Would I have found it funny 4yrs ago when I was sobbing at TV adverts with babies? Probably 😂

However, I suspect the board refers to those of us who are at peace with - or finding peace with - our childlessness. People who are still going through infertility testing, treatment, therapies etc have dedicated boards. This sounds like the afterlife of that awful period so many of us have had to survive and come to terms with.

So I'm on the fence.

I thought it was great at first but you're right, it's got a bit of a barb to it if you're childless rather than childfree. If it was a board intended ONLY for childfree people then fair enough, but my understanding was it was supposed to be a place for ALL people without children, no matter what circumstances led them to that.

What of the folks who have no children due to persistent losses, or infertility? I doubt they find their situation pun-worthy.

I also think Mumsnetters without children will attract more mumsnetters without children or potential ones in the future as it's clear what it is, as opposed to MumsNot unless you know the backstory.