Paid childcare for 1st month or two after birth

[bluprince13]

We are a couple living in London. Recently found out that my wife is pregnant.

Our parents are both based outside the UK and are not healthy enough to come to the UK to help out. We don't have any family in the UK and we're reluctant to burden our friends as well. Our friends and parents have said that the first month or two after birth is the hardest. I could take the 1st month off to help myself, but I would have to go back to work after that.

I just wondered if any of you have managed through the 1-2 months without external help?

Also, is it possible to hire a part-time nanny or something - e.g. for 4 hours per day or something - just to keep the cost affordable? Has anyone done something like this for the first two months?

Any advice is appreciated!

Read 'Post Partum Matters' by Sophie Messager, decide what is right for you and your family. Explore all of the options mentioned and maybe be flexible - you might think you want X, Y and Z and find that A, B and C, works better.

It doesn't have to be all on your partner when you go back to work - you may want to flex your hours and be home more than you are now, or you may want to find a way that she is not alone most of the time and that household admin and tasks do not also fall to her.

We are lucky to have great support from my in laws, but we still did all care ourselves in the first 2 months. After that, they'd come over and take him for a walk between breastfeeds occasionally so I could nap.

We had a cleaner, had meal prepped lots and otherwise generally dropped our standards for how tidy the house was! You'll be fine :)

We've found my return to work more challenging due to nursery illness and our shift work, so the extra family help has been invaluable there.

I have two no help either time

I'm a maternity nurse. I work nights only but some do days

So he's there is help about if want to pay for it

They will support advise reassure feed if bottles - and look after baby /child so you can get some tagaz

If you can afford it get help. There is a bit of a strange British culture that paying for help is somehow shameful. It’s not at all. I couldn’t afford help, but I think if you can you are so wise to pay for it!