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Paid childcare

Discuss everything related to paid childcare here, including childminders, nannies, nurseries and au pairs.

To leave Children alone for 30 minutes in the evening

80 replies

Flowercat1982 · 25/04/2023 18:30

Just trying to see what people's opinions are. I recently applied for a job I was really interested in. Applied late one evening, got a phone call the next morning to have an interview the next day, so I possibly had quite a good chance of getting the job. Long story short, the job entailed staying till 10pm at night. It's 5/10 minute drive from home. I had to turn it down as my partner works nights and leaves at 9.40/9.45 to get into work. 3 children aged 12, 5 and 3. Would it be really bad of me to have even considered leaving the children at home on there own at night for 30 minutes? They would all be in bed. At the moment my flexibility to work seems really limited. I know some people will say, just wait until the children are in school before changing jobs but the type of I'm looking at does not come up very often. And often will involve evenings.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
PoseyFlump · 25/04/2023 19:28

It'd be fine.... until it's not.

Twillow · 25/04/2023 19:30

It's a no from me - too much responsibility for a 12 year old if anything goes wrong.

bamboonights · 25/04/2023 19:32

How would the 12 year old cope with a flood or a fire? Could you love with the consequences?

Thought not.

chillih · 25/04/2023 19:33

Absolutely not OK. Also, your DH sounds like an arse.

TomatoSandwiches · 25/04/2023 19:36

Can you not find a reliable babysitter for that time and pay them 1 or 2 hrs instead of 30mins.
It is really shit that your husband is putting his eats above your job satisfaction tbh, I would try to find a way.

TomatoSandwiches · 25/04/2023 19:37

His wants* sorry

shelbaba · 25/04/2023 19:38

You only considered it and knocked back the job, so no it's not bad of u. I'd have probably been thinking how can I make this work too. U obvs realised though u cldnt do that. I think different if they were teens and the youngest was 8/9 but with an older sibling around.

The 12yr old it wld probably be ok but not with a 3 and 5yr old. Not fair to give the older child that responsibility too if something were to happen in that 30mins.

Okunevo · 25/04/2023 19:41

I'd have considered it with the 12 and 5 year old, but I think 12 is too young to babysit a child under school age, even for that short time.

GoodChat · 25/04/2023 19:43

How are his wants more important than your career satisfaction?

Get a job to inconvenience him out of spite. I would.

Blizzard23 · 25/04/2023 19:45

Rockbird · 25/04/2023 19:10

She's not putting her children at risk, she hasn't even got the job yet. But God forbid a woman apply for a job she will actually enjoy. Especially when the husband is too busy having a high old time to step up.

FFS yourself 🙄

The youngest is 3!! Of course it’s risky and dangerous. I can’t believe she had to ask. Dh needs to support her.

PinkPanther50 · 25/04/2023 20:04

Well technically you wouldn’t be the one leaving the children unattended…. I know that doesn’t help you but 🤷‍♀️

Heroicallyfound · 25/04/2023 20:13

@Flowercat1982 don't make up the employers mind for them. You don’t know for definite if there’s flexibility until you ask.

carly2803 · 25/04/2023 21:08

no absolutely not. Too young at 12 to be in charge

TooooBusy · 25/04/2023 21:11

Absolutely not in a million years.

lljkk · 25/04/2023 21:30

Could you find a couple of teenagers with nice references, who could pop in for half an hour? I dunno going rate (£4 for a 15-16 year old for half hour?) but if it makes your whole job feasible, sounds good value.

I'm suggesting 2 of them so you have backup if one is busy / suddenly unavailable.

lljkk · 25/04/2023 21:32

So... two teens on tap, only need one at a time, but regular schedule so they both know your house, your kids & routine, and they can cover for each other at short notice.

Leakingtoilet · 25/04/2023 21:37

No I definitely would not do it, and I'm pretty relaxed about stuff like this. My 4 year old often has a night terror around 10:00pm, would be awful if an adult wasn't present at the time

110APiccadilly · 25/04/2023 21:37

I'd say it would be an ideal job for an local older teen to come over for that half an hour just in case anything happens?

Blondeshavemorefun · 25/04/2023 21:51

Course you can't leave children that age alone as in the younger two

Would it be every weekend day night so mon to Fri ?

Can you find 2/3 teenagers and rotate and pay for an hour

Any neighbors with old teens who could babysit

ZuckerwatterMaus · 25/04/2023 21:54

I can’t believe that you would even let this cross your mind .

neveradullmoment99 · 25/04/2023 22:02

Far too young. I mean at 3 years old? You've got to be kidding!

NurseCranesRolodex · 25/04/2023 22:04

2 words, Madeline McCann.
Please don't do this, fires, trips, illness, child stepping outside to look for you.... Honestly it's not worth the risk. Get a sitter.

Skybluepinky · 25/04/2023 22:06

Completely mad if u do, u can put the responsibility on a 12 year old to look after a 3 and 5 year old especially if they r in bed!
I assume this post is a fake one.

Redebs · 25/04/2023 22:06

SheikYerboutiii · 25/04/2023 18:53

Of course you can’t leave a 3 and a 5 year old alone for 30 minutes! Fucking hell man.

👍

AuntMarch · 25/04/2023 22:07

I think the fact they'd be in bed makes it less ok if anything. The young ones would be distressed to wake up and find no adult there. The 12 year old would then have to deal with that and have their own sleep disrupted and probably feel quite anxious and struggle to resettle themselves even after you returned.