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Paid childcare

Discuss everything related to paid childcare here, including childminders, nannies, nurseries and au pairs.

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Original poster

What age did you put your baby/child into childcare?

67 replies

MsCactus · 23/01/2023 01:30

How many hours for? And what did you use - nursery, childminder, au pair, nanny... Etc?

If you took maternity leave, how long did you take? Did your partner take any leave too?

Have had my first baby, planning to go back to work in a few months, and am wondering what is "normal"

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

DaVariance · 23/01/2023 01:38

Normal is whatever suits your life

My DD went to nursery from 9 months and was very happy and settled there

CheesusWept · 23/01/2023 01:38

Full time in a nursery Mon - Fri, hours between 8am and 6pm, she was 5 months old at the time. I wish I’d had a bit longer at home with her, but she’s nearly 12 now and absolutely has not been adversely affected by it. We have always been very close.

Dad had 2 weeks paternity leave. But there is no ‘normal’. It’s what is right for your family, and what you can financially afford.

Raindropsdrop · 23/01/2023 10:26

I took 10 months off, DP has two weeks.

We put him in nursery at 2, was with grandparents before that.

Normal is whatever works for you.

WandaWonder · 23/01/2023 10:27

There is no normal, but 12 months 3 days a week

WhatHaveIFound · 23/01/2023 10:32

Both mine went for 3 days a week from 6 months old. Mondays they spent with DH's parents and Fridays they spent with me/us. Normally either visiting my parents or going out with NCT friends.

DH and I are self employed so no parental leave as such though since we had December babies they were born at our quietest time of year.

I don't think there is a 'normal'. You just have to work out what's best for your family.

Bestcatmum · 23/01/2023 10:35

DS went in at 6 weeks, it was the 1980's and we only had minimum maternity leave, I was a single mum.
He had a lovely childminder who was like family for years and was happy there.

mrsmarmalade12 · 23/01/2023 10:52

From 4 months old 3 days a week.

Original poster

MsCactus · 23/01/2023 11:43

This is all super helpful, thanks.

My mum was stay at home/worked weekends when we went to school so I don't have much frame of reference for this.

My plan is to take five months maternity, my husband then is taking four months paternity, and we're taking some holiday after - so DD will be about 10 months when she goes into full time childcare. She's a few weeks old and seems so little at the moment for childcare, so am wondering how they fare at 10 months

OP posts:

NatMoz · 23/01/2023 11:52

12 months and 2 days a week.

She'll be fine at 10 months.

underneaththeash · 23/01/2023 12:09

We went back earlier when I had DS1, so he was with a childminder at 6 months, then we moved him to a nursery at 7 months (childminder logistics didn’t suit him or my job), I was back 3 days a week.
DS2 was at nursery 2 days a week from 10 months and also a nanny 2 days.
I took a career break after having DD, but we had a mother’s help.

Maroon85 · 23/01/2023 12:19

My daughter went to a childminder 4 days a week (9-5 on 3 days a week and 9-3 1 day) from 6 months of age. A lot of people made me feel bad with their comments about young she was but she adapted really well and my new job could only wait so long for me.

Husband took 8 weeks (4 weeks paternity, 1 week coincided with when the workplace is closed anyway, and he added on 3 weeks annual leave).

Bemyclementine · 23/01/2023 12:22

Husband took no time off at all.

Dc1 - 9 months mat leave, returned part time, GPs did childcare. Started pre school ages 2 progressing from 2 half days, to 2.5 days by the time he was starting school

Dc2 ' 14 months mat leave. GPS did childcare. Preschool at 2, started with 2 days up to 4

escapingthecity · 23/01/2023 12:22

DD, nanny share at 9 months. DD, nursery at 11 months.

Workawayxx · 23/01/2023 12:25

9 or 10 months with both of mine. Childminder and grandparents with dc1 and 3 days per week nursery with dc2. I like the nursery as dc2 gets a very routine time there and I think that has helped her settle. They also make all their meals so they are all eating the same (and it’s sooo much easier for me!).

trilbydoll · 23/01/2023 12:27

9-10mo (can't remember exactly) 4 days pw.

DD1 benefitted from having loads of other kids around, she saw them walking / talking / eating with cutlery and wanted to do the same. DD2 just watched it all and was the biggest in the baby room for ages because she just sat and watched and never moved!

Yorkshireswithallroasts · 23/01/2023 12:33

My son went at 9 months for 3 days a week and my daughter at 8 months for the same. As everyone else has said, there is no 'normal', it was just what felt right for us and our kids. My husband had 4 weeks paternity leave and then took 2 weeks annual leave.

Reugny · 23/01/2023 12:34

There is no normal as what childcare you have access to depends on where you live.

Mine was with a CM 3 days before she was 10 months old for 3 days per week until 3 days before she was 3. She then started nursery as well. I took 4.5 months after birth my DP took the rest. My DP looked after her the other 2 days until she started nursery.

Another friend of mine did similar with her first but sent her child to nursery. One of the child's grandmothers looked after the child 1 day per week, and either her or her husband did the other day.

bobbyew · 23/01/2023 12:38

Bemyclementine · 23/01/2023 12:22

Husband took no time off at all.

Dc1 - 9 months mat leave, returned part time, GPs did childcare. Started pre school ages 2 progressing from 2 half days, to 2.5 days by the time he was starting school

Dc2 ' 14 months mat leave. GPS did childcare. Preschool at 2, started with 2 days up to 4

This is what I'm intending to do @Bemyclementine (although I'm returning at 11 months part time).
How did the children cope going to pre school having never attended nursery? My mum is looking after DD so we wont need to put her in formal childcare setting until 2.5/3

Parker231 · 23/01/2023 12:38

Had six months maternity leave - the norm then. Went back to work full time. DT’s went to a lovely local nursery. DH dropped them off around 7.45am and I collected them between 5.30-6pm. No family in the UK to help out but they did fly over regularly.

Managed to produce two well adjusted adults who have both graduated and working in their chosen careers.

StarsSand · 23/01/2023 12:41

I didn't put mine in until they turned 3.

I didn't feel like they got much out of it before then and a nanny made more sense for us for other reasons as well.

Both loved it once they were there but I was glad they weren't bombarded with colds and coughs when they were little. I couldn't have dealt with the time off work.

Maryandherlamb · 23/01/2023 12:41

11 months mat leave for my first, and they went to nursery at 11 months old for 2 days a week at first, stepping up to 4 days a week within the next 6 months. 9 months mat leave for my second, and they went to nursery at 15 months old for 2 days a week (only just started).

SummerInSun · 23/01/2023 12:42

With our first DC, I took 9 months and DH took 3 months, with our second I took 6 months and DH took 2 months. DC1 started nursery four days a week 8:30-5:30 at 12 months, DC2 at 9 months. Both are happy and well adjusted and great and making friends.

DH taking a really meaningful chuck of time was the best thing we ever did. It meant he properly understood how to look after the DC - what to pack to take them out of the house, how important nap time and routine was, how to entertain them, what to feed them, how to buy clothes and get haircuts and sign up to activities, how hard it can be to get other stuff done while looking after them. And he is very close to them, especially DC1.

Tormundsbeard · 23/01/2023 12:44

Both started nursery at 5 months. I dropped them off in the morning and DH started work earlier so he could finish early and pick them up.
DDs are now both happy 19 and 21 year olds.

OhhhhhhhhBiscuits · 23/01/2023 12:46

7 months old and full time at a small nursery setting (max 9 children).

Decafflatteplease · 23/01/2023 12:50

@bobbyew all mine (I have 4) have been at home with me until 3 - 4 years then have gone to preschool 2-3 days a week and have all done absolutely fine 🙂 so I wouldn't necessarily worry about grandparents having them as long as they are having plenty of social interaction with grandparents

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