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Paid childcare

Discuss everything related to paid childcare here, including childminders, nannies, nurseries and au pairs.

Childminder forgot to collect child

61 replies

MummyNico · 24/09/2019 20:05

So today our childminder was supposed to collect our 4 yo son from class at end of the day. It's her second day doing this. I got a call from the school at 3:30pm to say nobody had collected my son.
She's brand new to us but was recommended by a friend. What would overreacting look like? Part of me wonders if I should be searching for a new childminder and explaining that I understand it was a new routine but she should have systems in place so that she knows which children she's collecting and I don't have the mental capacity at work to be worrying whether my child has been collected. Other part of me wonders should I give her the benefit of doubt. Would finding alternative childcare be overreacting?
Never used a childminder before but it seems a bit of a red flag when your child is left behind because he hasn't been collected.

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Shinysun · 24/09/2019 20:07

How did she react when you spoke with her? I'd be worried too but my actions moving forward would depend on her response.

BananaSpanner · 24/09/2019 20:07

If you otherwise thought she was brilliant, give her the benefit of the doubt. If you had any other even slight concerns, change CM now.

Lindybop89 · 24/09/2019 20:09

That was the weird bit. She apologised but wasn't overly apologetic. She didn't offer to go back and get him and I had to come out of work to go and collect him myself. She did have other children to look after so I understand she may not have wanted to take them all back out again but I missed an area meeting of which I will be pulled up on tomorrow.

Teddybear45 · 24/09/2019 20:10

This wouldn’t be something I forgave. Picking up kids is part of this childminder’s job. It doesn’t matter how it happened the bottom line is that her organisational processes are not fit for purpose. I would be furiously telling she she’s sacked and find someone else

Isaididont · 24/09/2019 20:11

I would change CM if she wasn’t overly apologetic. Such a pain for you, hope you find someone good

Weepingwillows12 · 24/09/2019 20:11

I usually advocate benefit of the doubt but no way in this situation. You cany just forget a child and then seem to give no fucks later on the phone. I would never trust her again. Might be different if she had provided great care for years first. Get anew childminder in my view.

CloudsCanLookLikeSheep · 24/09/2019 20:12

She's fucked up and not apologised properly. I'd be looking elsewhere.

MissTicPizza · 24/09/2019 20:13

She didn't offer to go back and get him? That's appalling and I would never feel able to trust her 100% after that. I would be making new childcare arrangements if I were you.

Lindybop89 · 24/09/2019 20:15

Yeah, due to it only being day 2 and forgetting him makes me wary. I have nothing to judge her on so unfortunately this doesn't bode well for her. I thought she might message me later on and apologise properly but I've not heard from her.

youarenotkiddingme · 24/09/2019 20:16

I'd also change.

You are paying her for a service.

She failed to deliver that service.

When that was pointed out she failed to rectify it - despite still having the money.

Has she even suggested a refund of they session?

ChildminderMum · 24/09/2019 20:17

I think almost every childminder has done this once to be honest - usually if it's a new pick up or change of days.

She should have been mortified and gone back for him though!

bobstersmum · 24/09/2019 20:20

Not a good start. Also I think your name change failed op.

Lindybop89 · 24/09/2019 20:21

No, no mention of anything such as refund or deducting it from next month's sessions. She only collects him twice a week so I won't see/hear from her until next week but then I'll be sat in work fretting as to whether he'll be collected or not.

StealthPolarBear · 24/09/2019 20:22

This is basic stuff and presumably your son isn't too settled in yet. I'd be looking into other options.

justanothernameonthewall · 24/09/2019 20:23

I'm a cm and I have forgotten a child once. I remembered after 10 mins whilst still in the playground and was already rushing to the office when the mum called me (the school had called her.)

I was mortified and very apologetic. It was a different day to when I would normally collect a child and I reviewed my business processes after it. I now set alarms for anything that's out with the norm.

Given your cm's response I would be looking at alternative childcare. I would always go and collect a child and I'm surprised she didn't . It's her responsibility!!

Lindybop89 · 24/09/2019 20:23

This is the part of me that feels tight for considering changing childminders. She has always been lovely in person, if a bit ditsy/forgetful when messaging back and forth. But it's that ditsy forgetfulness that's making me wonder if this will be a reoccurring event.

PinkCrayon · 24/09/2019 20:26

Her reaction is really off. No way would I use her again.

Sewbean · 24/09/2019 20:27

She should have gone straight back to collect him no matter how many other kids she had. This was her mistake to fix, not yours. Refusing to go back for him and not apologising properly would be the end of the relationship for me. We can all make mistakes, it's how we deal with them that matters.

And I find the comment above that most childminders have done this at least once quite worrying tbh. How hard is it to write a list? These are little kids we are talking about, not dry cleaning.

MissPepper8 · 24/09/2019 20:28

Wow she didn't go at all? So you had to go and collect your son and she still took your money??

I think you need to look else where yes, if this was me I would be more than apologetic, embarrassed and gone to pick him up, if not refunded you.

MoveOnTheCards · 24/09/2019 20:30

I’d be going elsewhere for my childcare. I would doubt if I could rely on her to collect in future (who needs that extra stress?) and then I wouldn’t trust her care and attention to detail based on her attitude when you spoke to her.

Zebrasinpyjamas · 24/09/2019 20:31

I would not give her the benefit of the doubt with that reaction.

Lindybop89 · 24/09/2019 20:34

I think I'm more annoyed that she's not checked on afterwards either. She's not messaged to ask if my son was OK or that he wasn't to upset - he's only 2 weeks into his school life. I genuinely thought she'd follow up with a message with a further apology, offer of rectifying it with a refund, and make sure I got my son OK and he was ok.

Zzz1234 · 24/09/2019 20:36

I used to be a childminder and never forgot a child in 5 years, I’d be mortified if I had!

DustOffYourHighestHopes · 24/09/2019 20:37

I’d expect apologies and utter mortification, and a practical solution on the day. Otherwise I’d walk.

FunnysInLaJardin · 24/09/2019 20:41

My lovely CM (who is still a friend) used to collect my DC every day from school up to yr 4 for DS1. She never forgot. I would be looking for a new CM