Is my aupair being cheeky? Says it is hard for her to walk 25 min each way for school run.

[blueshoes]

My first aupair (French) is starting in Aug. But I am already having doubts.

An important part of the aupair's duties is to do my dd's school run. The school is a 25 min walk away, with dd age 4 in a buggy. Now the aupair emails to says that a 25x4 walk every day is hard for her to do.

She was asking about taking a bus and having a bus pass.

I emailed her to explain that a bus would take longer (35 min+), she would still have to walk 20 mins each way (because the school is not near the bus stop), and the roads are congested in the mornings. Plus it will cost us £20 a week in bus fare. She does not seem to have taken that in (language problem?).

Is she angling for us to provide her with a bus pass or contribute to her travel costs? Or does she have a point about such a long walk? I personally have done it (old-ish and weak as I am, lol) and don't see why a young strapping 20 year old cannot.

We are paying her £65 a week allowance - which I feel is slightly above market for what is IMO quite an easy job(London).

Do any of you who are aupair employers pay/subsidise transport costs on top of allowance? Should I ditch her before she starts, as being lame?

Gess, in winter it must have been very dark that walk through the heath....

It is far more usual that being at pre-school in a school has no bearing on getting a place at the school itself .. that will be done on admission criteria

I would personally check that out thoroughly as you may well find it makes no difference

I thought Lewisham had a common admissions policy anyway

I really don't think this is slave labour. Blueshoes is paying a standard wage and only asking the usual duties from her au pair.

(I am getting an au pair next week who in her current job is doing 50 hours a week, sole charge of 4 children for £100 - that is slave labour).

However, I wonder whether you can share the school run with her? Can you or your dh drop off your dd on the way to work so all she has to do is pick her up? If the pushchair can be left at school during the day that makes it more flexible for the ap, so she can go to school on her way back from college or whatever. When it is raining, and cold in winter it will be a miserable experience doing that walk, and maybe you have think of ways of making it more pleasant. Otherwise I would suggest hiring an au pair and being up front about this part of the duties - some aps won't mind at all.

Private school Twiglett

mmmmm 2x25 sessions per day to listen to music whilst walking sounds like heaven! Is the bike a possibility?

'I had potential applicants beating down my door to earn that £65, literally hundreds and hundreds. My email inbox was getting clogged from all the responses. I thought I made it clear to this ap, but I accept the language barrier. '

Then why are you wasting your time still flogging this dead horse?

Why do you need continued justification from a bunch of people online to find another person?

If you've got such a desirable set-up, then it shouldn't take long to find someone whose absolutely gagging to walk 2 hours a day as part of the job.

Why wait?

Nowhere on Blackheath is dark is it? It's one big road.......

Well collection of roads.

Perhaps she is concerned for her safety, and that of your child, especially if she doesn't know the area or even London very well and has read recent publicity about knife crime etc. Personally I'd rather have the option of taking the bus than commit to 4 25 minute walks but the potential practical inconvenience you see in that is hard to convey without her having local knowledge. What if you offered a little extra to contribute towards that option ?

btw most private schools would hold places for Reception entry as class sizes usually expand then by a couple , have you asked about deferral ?

I reiterate the opinion expressed in my previous post... I don't think your au pair is cheecky, quite the contrary, she is very upfront and straight at letting you know that you are taking the piss wanting her to do all that walking....

Blackheath it is a very nice area surely if you can afford to take your children to private school you could strech a few more pounds a week so you have a happier au pair and a better conscience....

Blackheath Village is lovely and light but parts of the Heath in winter when is dark at 2 pm are not very well lighted....fact!

I'm always amazed at how cheap people are with the people who looking after their most precious part of them.

one of the joys of looking after children expat in whatever capacity

Honestly, south. They'll fork out for private schools, houses, buggies, etc.

Then nickel and dime over the childminder.

Truly, the mind boggles.

never a truer word spoken expat

thank you elliot, gess, cargirl, polly. It is a fair wage for the job spec: 25 hours per week for £65 , food, board. This is recommended by two ap websites and other mums on the aupair threads. So I am quite secure in that.

Chelseamum, you are entitled to your views. I also value her upfrontness. i knew I would get some comments on the private school thing. The irony is that if I went the state school option, I would save enough money to keep ap in clover and more!

Gess, you are right, the heath is open, and even in cold winter, will be welllit by street lamps and well traversed by cars at all times of the day and night. I checked with dh just to be doublesure. Don't think safety will be an issue. Most of the route is along a road with cars.

southeast, yes, she can go straight to language class from dd's school and save herself a return journey, if she times her classes right.

expat, yes, yes! Dh and I are now composing a "you must like walking or this job is not for you" email. Will let you ladies know how it goes.

Thanks so much for all your views!

but didn't you mention a track?

I wouldn't be comfortable walking in the dark in blackheath in a road with little traffic

but then I am merde-de-poulet

It's honestly not worth stressing about, blue.

You do have ample time and it sounds like a desirable locale.

Hopefully you'll find someone even better and then you won't have to worry about this anymore.

Agree with expat. Get someone else (or ask her upfront how much of a problem it will be). I would have loved a job walking kids too and fro- would have much preferred to mountains of ironing. Walk further than that with ds1 many days; quite enjoy it. There will be someone out there who will want the job.

CM- London is never dark at 2pm. PMSL.

Good luck in your search!

I have always been athletic and would have enjoyed walking.

I'd have worked on getting that girl out of the buggy asap, though , because really, cylonbabe is right, a child is better off with as much exercise as possible.

There'll be someone out there who won't find that a problem.