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CM club: should i phone social services?

113 replies

dmo · 23/02/2007 18:34

i know it always happens to me
and being a cm i cant bounce off anybody i am the key person the child protection officer of my setting.
anyway i have an 8yr old boy (quite grown up for his age) he lives with his mum and his uncle (uncle has problems has a mental age of 15yrs)
so the mum has a new boyfriend and has been with him 8 mths he lives in Kent (about 5 hrs drive away) mum goes down most weekends on her own to visit boyfriend and leaves her son with his uncle.
last weekend mum took son to kent and on monday she was really cross with him when she dropped him off because he had embrassed her (didnt ask what he had done)
anyway mum picked son up on monday night all smiles as she had just booked to go to america for 2 weeks in march with boyfriend without son.
she drops son off this morning and tells me uncle is picking son up from me tonight as she is going to france for the weekend with boyfriend.
this got me thinking as i know uncle works nights.
so i asked 8 yr old if uncle still worked at night and he said yes, so i said who looks after you at night and he said he stays at home alone (uncle works from 9pm till 6.30am) i asked what he does and he said he has to stay in bed.
now i know this is all hearsay from an 8 yr old boy but the way he told me its as if it happens alot.
do i take what a 8yr old tells me (after all uncle could have booked time off work, or they have a neighbour/friend come over to look after him)
i did try to talk to uncle when he picked the 8yr old up asking if he had booked time off work but he really is like a child (get more sence out of the 8yr old) so i didnt get very far

just tell me your veiws cant really talk to anybody about this

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furcoatandnoknickers · 27/02/2007 21:34

good luck dmo. What an awful position to be in. Fingers x for the little boy and you.

You must have a 2nd sense about this as if she was lovely you wouldnt really put 2 and 2 together over her going away (although 2 wks is a goodly long time..)etc You would just assume that he was going to a friends or another family member..x

looneytune · 27/02/2007 21:37

God this is awful, all our training etc. led me to believe things like this would be dealt with, I am shocked

Dh is fuming at this thread and said that you should threaten SS with going to the press if they don't do something. I think he's really because he had an awfully abusive childhood and thought that these days, a lot more was done!!!

I really feel for you! I'm so pleased he has someone like you looking out for him!!

DeviousDaffodil · 27/02/2007 21:44

dmo, i really think SSD are fobbing you off. It is their job to investigate child protection matters that are ongoing.
The Police should attend in an emergency, but you should not have to wait for an emergency to happen. If SSD are not responding appropriately, ring your local main police station and ask to speak to teh sergeant on the child protection unit.They might get things moving.
I have worked in child protection and this hread is really worrying me.

looneytune · 27/02/2007 21:46

Oh yes, please follow DD's advice, I still can't get over how all these different people are just ignoring you!!

foxybrown · 27/02/2007 21:55

Am appalled by the way you and this case has been treated. It is absolutely shocking.
I think you are doing absolutely the right thing and wish you lots of luck with it.

quietmouse · 27/02/2007 21:58

have spoken to a friend of mine who works in child protectin (senior position) and she says the way your SS department are handling this is not standard. She is truly shocked and says you must phone back and demand action is taken,

DeviousDaffodil · 27/02/2007 22:10

I have to agree I have worked closley with SS in the past and my local team are very conscientious and would have been out on a referral such as this straight away.
We had a similar case where an older child was being left at home alone whilst a parent was out working nights adn they would not let it go.
You sometimes have to make a nuisance of yourdelf to get something done.
I would ask to speak to the team manger as often the people answering the phonea are not qu;aified SW's.
Excuse typing please

mogs0 · 27/02/2007 22:42

This is slightly off the subject but...

If a child isn't collected on time and parents aren't responding to your phone calls, then you try the emergency contact and get no response there, so you call SS as the last resort, what will they do then?

If SS aren't responding as we'd all expect, to something that most see as a serious situation, then are they going to respond to a child not being collected? Or is that just something that's logged and held on file?

Sorry for the rambling. I have no experience with SS and hope I never do.

This boy is lucky to have you and I hope things get sorted soon.

dmo · 28/02/2007 09:43

true mog
didnt know the police had a child protection officer so will phone them today and explain all
thanks so much everyone for all your help

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KaySamuels · 28/02/2007 09:55

Hope you find them more helpful dmo - this is terrible don't let it lie! That poor lad! They must know what they are doing is wrong to medicate him but that is even more dangerous imo!

DeviousDaffodil · 28/02/2007 20:20

How have you got on today dmo?

princesscc · 01/03/2007 09:34

any news dmo? I've thought of nothing else for days now!

DeviousDaffodil · 01/03/2007 11:12

?

NAB3 · 01/03/2007 11:20

Haven't read all as too cross. I would phone the police and social services on an hourly basis logging everything that is said and who you speak too. I would refuse to let the boy go home and I would make a Huge F*ing fuss. This is WRONG!!!!!!!!!!

princesscc · 01/03/2007 11:57

NAB3 will fill you in - basically dmo has phoned everyone and everyone keeps passing the buck - police, ss, ncma, social worker, ofsted - you are right, it is totally sh*t. Thing is if she keeps the kid, you just know what will happen. Mother will probably call the police and it will be all dmo's fault and she will get into trouble and probably struck off by ofsted!

Songbird · 01/03/2007 12:50

dmo - what about the boy's father? Does he live in the area? I'd like to think he would be very concerned about all this, though that may be wishful thinking!

NAB3 · 01/03/2007 17:30

In that case get it in writing from all of them that should anything happen to this poor boy they will say they did what they could. I would ring your MP and just keep on. IT IS WRONG and I am flipping fuming. Give us an email and lets see if anything happens if all of us on here who cares emails.

dmo · 01/03/2007 18:48

thanks NAB
boys father not around since b4 boy was born
i have phoned the poilce but will re-phone tomorrow night when she (mum) goes to see boyfriend

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dmo · 01/03/2007 18:49

priness
why would mother phone the police? you have me worried now

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princesscc · 01/03/2007 19:17

Oh god - sorry dmo! I was just making the point to NAB3 that if you kept the boy and refused to give him back, you would probably get into trouble, which would be just bloody typical of the way the system works. Sorry love, I didn't mean to worry you!

dmo · 01/03/2007 19:49

oh i get it now
thought you meant kept boy as a mindee not refuse to give him to mum
now i know why mum would phone police
not worried now i would never keep the boy i am poss mum loves him but its just the night issues

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DeviousDaffodil · 01/03/2007 19:54

dmo - how were the police? Did they seem interested?

dmo · 01/03/2007 19:57

sort of its hard to tell they seemed intrested last friday but not sure (if fact almost poss) if they did anything about it

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DeviousDaffodil · 01/03/2007 20:02

Which part of the country are you?
You don't have to answer .
I have worked in this field for a long time and I am just astounded at the attitude you are getting.

dmo · 01/03/2007 20:08

Preston Lancs
north west

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