Am i daft to look for a new job

[pinkdaffodil23]

Hi looking for others thoughts cause im not sure if im just being daft at the moment.
I work as a full time nanny for a family with three children none are yet at school. I love the family and they treat me like family but i feel a little fed up at the moment.
I always look to see what jobs are out there but thats normal but recently I have really found myself wanting a new job. I would say im paid mid range i get £7.50 net p/h i have 7 years childcare experience half as a nanny half in nurseries and have a childcare degree. I am currently finding myself feeling really bored and not challenged at all and really not apprecuated by the family. I go away with them often and often do over time. I know they want me to stay on until the youngest goea to school which is three years away. Am i daft for wanting to look for a new job. I know if i left they would be really upset witj me and i would really miss the children but I also feel like I need a change. Im so confused I really dont know what to do. I dont have a contract either and have been with the family for three years.
any advice lovely people?

You need to put yourself first.

Its not about if the family will be upset etc.

When push comes to shove.. families will always put their needs first.
You need to put your needs first.

Life is too short to be unhappy.

Also.. in your new job.. make sure you have a contract agreed and signed at the very start.

You need to feel valued and appreciated in your job.

Goodluck with the job search

What do you want to do to be challenged?

Looking after 3 under school age and juggling their differing needs is a tough job! I'm not sure it gets much more challenging!

£7:50 net is not a great wage but at the moment the job market is very slow and it's an employers market, looking at positions now and the wages are much lower than 3 years ago!

Do you have any gripes with the family? Obviously you don't have to air your dirty laundry in public, just a yes or no! But feel free to PM me if you want further advice. I have been a nanny for 28 years and some times the grass looks greener on the other side but most of the time, it's better the devil you know! If you don't have any real grievances and they are treating you correctly then it might be better to stay put.

Do you have any concerns about not having a contract?

Better the devil you know for sure!

I agree with Callaird. Sometimes the idea of a new job is far better than the reality. Especially if you go from a family who treat you as family to one who treats you as an employee.

Perhaps you need to change careers, OP. Is it possible that you've gone as for as you want with nannying or even with childcare generally? Looking after small children can be rewarding but is also extremely hard work and can be lonely - also, shamefully underpaid for the effort involved. You have a degree in childcare - could you put it to some other use or build on it to enter a different profession? Or perhaps start planning to retrain for some other kind of job completely?

Or if that is too drastic, maybe you just need a complete change of scene - nannying for a family abroad perhaps, or in a different part of the country. Perhaps with different aged children - three under five sounds tough!

You definitely sound as if you are in a rut and getting unhappy as a result. Most definitely put yourself first - most families don't hesitate to dispense with nannies as soon as their need for them is over. You sound as if you need to make some changes -accept it and start planning now!

there is never any harm in looking for a new job, only time will tell if/when you are offered it if you want to leave, or stay with your family

agree 3 under 5 is prob the most challenging, unless want twins as well lol

the grass isnt always greener

sure you are appreciated by the family, maybe you need to not go away with them?

tbh 7.50 nett isnt a bad wage for 7years exp, prob £9/10gross hours depending , or you can earn a little more then be at that wage for the next 10years if carry on nannying

im at the top end of pay, i wont generally earn much more then i do, but have been at the same wage for 4yrs now iyswim - and i have over 22years exp as a sole charge nanny including new born twins

def get a contract sorted,illegal for one, two you have no back up regards pay/hours/salary etc

I dont know what i need to be more challenged its just every day is the same at the moment and its a little argghh lol. Cant go into detail as to why as i dont want to get found out. The going away is something that yes they want me to do. Its to their holiday home in this country but i find myself wondering why am here as nothing happens and im really bored and want to go home.
lovelife no not got ant particular major gripes with the family although lots of little things that are currently getting to me.
I know its not always best to leave thats why i find myself so confused at the moment cause i just dont know what I need to do.
bettercausall i do feel like im in a rut and want a new challenge as in i would like to work in a role such as in a childrens hospice. Thats what i always wanted to do its just hard to get into.
Thanks for all the advice so far
I

It sounds as though your present job is taking up too much of your life -as if you don't have enough of a life beyond it. I assume you're a live-in nanny? Because, if you are - and are already working long basic hours - going away with the family often and doing overtime a lot will leave very little time for yourself. You must be working very hard with three under-fives, so it's possible you're suffering from burn-out.

It sounds as if you don't have enough time for yourself - for socialising, and hobbies and interests. Do you feel you lack adult company? It must be lonely working long hours with just the children. What about a job in a nursery while you work on getting into a hospice?

I have worked in nurseries before and wouldnt want to go back. No im not a live in nanny i live out but do long hours like all nannies. I also babysit for them on a friday night and at the weekends. Yes sometimes i do muss adult company but not all the time. The eldest goes to school in sept so dont know if i will feel different then or not. I have been invited for an interview for a job closer to home, less hours more pay although some over nights needed and for school aged children. Im just so confused on what i should do. Granted i may not get the job but if i did i know id be totally stuck on what to do. There are other things that bug me about job at mo but if i put it on here it would be easy for my employer to recognise me if she is on here

Is it possible you are working for too many hours with the overtime and holiday work and have lost touch with your own private life as an adult? How often do you get to meet up with friends, go out for an evening and when was the last time you took a holiday? I don't think anyone can work in any job without decent breaks and not get really fed up, and I think this is especially true when you spend most of your time interacting with very young children.

Potentially i suppose. I havent had a week away from them for nearly a year now the most i have had away from them is 4 days the other week when they went away for a weekend and i got to stay at home.

if i were young again i would go abroad and do nannying, and learning another language. have you thought about going abroad? english speaking nannies get paid a lot in some of the arab countries. or alternatively branch out into something related, like TEFL or primary school teaching? xx

I don't know if another job or a change of career would be a good idea, but I think you need a proper holiday before you decide. Do you have a contract? How much holiday does it entitle you to? I did the same as you, worked through my holidays as it was the only way the work could get done, but it is very very wearying and you can't do it long term without getting really fed up!

What about childminding? You could work mon-fri, and charge £4/£5 ph per child. That would double your wage if you had three littlies as you currently do.

I think you sound burnt out. Life with 3 young ones can feel like Groundhog Day. Do you have a RL nanny support network for play dates and so on? Sometimes just a bit of adult company can really help.

Are you trying to do too much in your job? 3 children is enough to fit in some days without extra duties. If you're still holding yourself to the standards of 3 years ago that might be contributing because that's a lot of pressure.

Have you had a meeting with your bosses recently? Small niggles might be easily solved but over time they just become huge issues.

I can understand you not wanting to say much so you don't necessarily need to reply! MN for nannies is a risk in case your employers are here. There are nanny specific places out there though.

No going abroad isnt something for me. Neither is chldminding I still live at home with my parents. No i dont have a contract, i do get my holiday allowance its just that i havent been able to use it to have a whole week off at once, its odd days here and there. No meetings as they always say they see me as family and it all makes it a little awkward. Dont get me wrong I love the family and the children all though there are points getting to me at the moment whether they should get to me or not I dont know. I now find myself with an interview for another job tomorrow and im very confused. OK they may not like me and I might not get the job but if I was offered it I honestly dont know what I would do, Im always scared of change as it is, so this is a big thing for me and ofcourse it might not end up working and then i would regret it. At the same time its closer to home, older children, both boys, less hours, better pay. I just dont know how I could tell the family im leaving cause i know they would be so much upset..... soooooo confused :(

They clearly realise that you are very nice and play on the family thing to keep you there. However, when they don't need you any more, they will get rid of you, no doubt. Just go to the interview and stop panicking. Changes are good for people's careers.

I have asked to go for the interview tonight its all so sudden but i know i will always wonder what if

You need to take your holiday as a week off in one go - or two weeks as you get 28 days - usually 2 weeks each choice and the 8 bank holidays - if you want to

A day here or there isn't a break

Tho guess depends if you want that

You would have had 4 days break with bhw as you work fulltime so hope tho has given you a little break

What would make you stay there?

You can say no to babysitting - ie nannies are allowed a life

And go for the interview

See what happens and go from there. You may hate it

Hi Blondes
No i was away with them for the bhw. I work 4 days a week so have Mondays off from them but the babysitting is kind of part of the job. I am expected to do every friday night, and then either the sunday or the saturday, sometimes both but not often any more as I managed to cut down on that. I got 20 days holiday to take when I want. I did use to get more as they go away for a week every couple of months but that has now changed as they decided when the youngest came along that they wanted me to go along with them when they go away.

Nomdeclavier, no i dont have a real nanny network, we see parents at toddler groups and play school drop off but not other nannies there is not any attending any of our local groups. The parents talk to me at toddler groups dont see them outside of there and to be honest mum boss is not the kind of person to have others around the house anyway

Definitely go for the interview and find out more about the job - from the sound of it, it won't be nearly such hard work, with two older children rather than three under-fives as you have at the moment. Also, more pay!

You are definitely not getting enough breaks in your present job, which would make anyone unhappy -it's ridiculous that you haven't had a whole week off for almost a year. Another problem, I think, is the constant babysitting which is encroaching on your time off and personal life. You are babysitting every week on two (sometimes three) weekend nights -what about your social life? Your employers are enjoying their Friday and Saturday nights out while you stay in and look after their kids! Also, if you work Tuesday to Friday but then have to babysit at weekends too, you''re not getting a real break from your job to recharge your batteries.

If you are offered this other job, and want to take it, do not be at all influenced by your present employers being "upset"! I'm not surprised that they want to hang on to you - you are making their lives easy at your own expense. The holiday/time off (or rather, the no holiday/time off) situation is ridiculous and you should definitely assert yourself over that if you don't leave this job soon. It sounds as if there are other things that are really bothering you too, although you feel unable to tell us.

Don't be afraid of change - it's what moves life on and it sounds as if, in your case, you've everything to gain from it!

I hope you're getting time off in lieu for the Bank Hols, and if you don't work Mondays you're potentially being short changed for holiday.

There seem to be a lot of underlying flaws in this current job. Question is do you want to fix them it would you rather move on and start afresh with a new family?

Nom no time of in lieu, when i go away with them they see it as much as a holiday for me as them and tell me I dont have to work my normal hours, but to me if im not needed to work then I dont need to go. Anyway after lots of discussion and tears lol the decision has been made to not go for the interview today and instead send a heart felt email of everything how im feeling to the family tonight as I am off for a couple of days now and go from there.

Going on holiday with the family is not your holiday! You should be having a proper holiday, everyone will cope and it's not your problem if they do not.

If I were you I would speak to them face to face, too many misunderstandings happen on paper and you won't be there to explain what you mean and how you fee. Leaving it all to 'stew' for a couple of days as well may make their reaction to the e-mail more extreme.