Returning the favour?

[floandheidi25]

Here's the scenario.. My SIL minds my little girl who is almost three. I pay her - perhaps not the going rate of a childminder, so would obviously like to return any favours or help I can. She has kids of her own.. However I have never been asked to mind them despite that they are p4 and p6 and love the company if my little one. she'd prefer to drive them miles to any other relative than let me look after them. I'm a good mother and absolutely adore the kids. It annoys me as i would consider it a privilege.

Have you asked her if the kids can come round to play? Maybe start with something like that. Show her you want to have the kids.

Have you said anything to her? Maybe those other relatives complain if they don't have the kids, or the kids ask to go there as they have a great time- so she's never thought to bring them to you as she feels she has a system that works.

She maybe thinks that as you pay her, it's not a favour she is doing for you, but you are actually employing her. Maybe she feels if you have her dc then she will be expected to have your dd for more hours than she does at the moment to return that favour.
Just ask her when they can come round to play, say that your dd has been asking and she would like her cousins to come round and play at her house on day and when would be convenient.

Maybe she thinks you would expect her to pay you? I agree with pp. Invite her round for a cup of tea and the children can play.

Is your sil a cm? You say you don't pay her the good rate so assume not

Does she have kids at her house so is registered? Or does she come to your house?

And maybe she doesn't want to impose