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Paid childcare

Discuss everything related to paid childcare here, including childminders, nannies, nurseries and au pairs.

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Original poster

What of these would you expect a live in nanny to pay for?

23 replies

confusedalways · 15/04/2013 19:15

What of these would you expect a live in nanny to pay for?
Washing powder, Toilet roll- if they have a private ensuite room, lightbulbs, coffee- if they're the only one in the house to drink it, treats like biscuits and chocolate.

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forevergreek · 15/04/2013 19:23

Only coffee/ treats etc.. That you don't eat

Everything else I would say you provide.

olivo · 15/04/2013 19:27

Only things that you wouldn't buy and use yourselves. And if you buy treats, I wouldn't expect her to use/eat them, unless you specifically invited her to!

reggiebean · 15/04/2013 19:31

I was a live-in nanny once, and my employers paid for all "household" goods, including toilet roll, washing powder, etc., and gave me a shopping list where I could add my requests, i.e., coffee, biscuits.

There was never a defined "limit" that they would spend, but I never felt comfortable asking them for stuff the rest of the house didn't eat, so I often bought my own stuff. I normally only requested things like apple juice, pancakes, etc., that I quite liked, but that the child could eat/drink as well.

grabaspoon · 15/04/2013 19:33

What of these would you expect a live in nanny to pay for?

Washing powder - I will occassionally pick up a bottle of detergent but it then becomes comunal.

Toilet roll- if they have a private ensuite room - I haven't had an ensuite so again these are bought by my boss

Lightbulbs - I check in the cupboard and if theres one there then I use it if not I will pick one up when we're out and about

coffee- if they're the only one in the house to drink it, - I have a lot of coffee dates so will again occassionaly buy a box of tea bags that become communal - I buy my own hot chocolate/green tea.

treats like biscuits and chocolate - treats I buy myself but am welcome to help myself out of the treat cupboard - occassionally I will treat myself out the box and ocassionally I will share my own chocolate with dc.

Pleasenomorepeppa · 15/04/2013 19:35

My family used to ask me what I wanted & just added it to the shopping list, as do my friends families.
No live-in Nanny I know has ever had to provide their own loo roll or light bulbs.
Also when I lived out I was asked if there was anything I wanted them to keep in for me.

OutragedFromLeeds · 15/04/2013 20:22

I wouldn't expect a live-in nanny to pay for any of those things unless the coffee/snacks were very expensive ones or they wanted an unreasonably high amount of them.

Food-wise the nanny should be provided with 'reasonable food'. I would say breakfast, lunch, dinner plus the occasional snack (biscuit/piece of fruit/packet of crisps) and hot drink would be reasonable.

The fact that the nanny is the only one to drink the coffee is irrelevant imo. It makes no difference, in terms of cost, whether you buy extra tea/hot chocolate/green tea/ whatever your drink of choice is or whether you buy a small jar of coffee for her and the normal amount of whatever you normally drink.

Ihatepeas · 15/04/2013 22:23

I agree with Outraged I have done lots of live in positions and never payed for any of the above. I might possibly buy my own biscuits and treats if I wanted a particular brand that s more expensive but generally not.

MaternityNanny31 · 16/04/2013 20:09

As a nanny/Maternity Nurse I would not and have never paid for any of those, and wouldn't work for someone who felt I should as it seems quite petty.

Anyone I have worked for has been so grateful for my help, they have gone out of their way to buy food/things I like in return.

I add anything I want to the shopping list, but I have to say I never add anything unusual/expensive and it all goes in the cupboard and the parents are welcome to eat it too (which they often do). If I want something as a treat (say chocolate) I buy it and keep it in my room, with my own money.

I did however take a job with a separate live-in cottage, I bought all my own food. They provided the loo roll, bulbs, washing powder etc, breakfast with family and lunch. I just bought my own dinner, although they filled my cupboard with bread, milk, tea, sugar and I was allowed to go and get basics from the larder such as pasta, rice etc.

I hope this helps. :)

Original poster

confusedalways · 17/04/2013 12:53

Okay thanks, that's all helpful. I work for a family who seem to begrudge me all of these things, making little comments here and there. Wanted to check I wasn't expecting too much of them based on others experiences.

OP posts:

iluvkids · 17/04/2013 19:04

Experienced live in nanny here.and no..you are not expecting too much at all

chocoholicanon · 17/04/2013 22:05

Lived in for 3 years, own lounge with a mini kitchen and would add my food requests to the family shopping list, if it was chocolate or treats I wasn't willing to share then I would buy it myself. Any household goods such as loo roll, washing powder, liquid soap were provided for by the family.

Nannyme1 · 01/07/2013 10:07

Family should pay for ALL of that!

The toilet paper is just beyond a joke! Would they rather you not wipe to save on them buying bl00dy toilet paper!?!

If I wanted expensive things (and to eat the entire packet) I would uy myself. I think it is all within reason though with food. If you are someone that eats enough for 3 people then I think that's taking the piss but if you eat like a normal person, or even just a touch more than they should pay for it all.

HappyAsEyeAm · 01/07/2013 10:15

We have a live out nanny, and I provide all meals and drinks that she and her nanny friends eat here. Obviously she uses our loo roll when she is here too! If she wanted to eat anything in particular when she was here, I would encourage her to use kitty money to buy it, but she is not at all extravagant. If she wants to do some washing or use the tumble dryer when she is here (a few months ago, she was having a new kitchen installed at home, and I encouraged her to do he laundry here, or maybe cook something here using our oven or whatever for her dinner at her home) that is fine too.

In your situation, the things you cite should be provided.

valiumredhead · 01/07/2013 10:19

When I was a live out nanny all of the above was provided and there was a float that I could buy extras out of if I wanted things that weren't in the fridge.

yamsareyammy · 01/07/2013 10:20

Do you work for an agency?
Are you highly paid compared to other nannies?

Original poster

confusedalways · 01/07/2013 20:38

Nope no agency, and definitely not high paid, more like an au pair wage for a nanny job.

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CharlieCoCo · 12/07/2013 22:16

i wouldnt pay for any of that either (im a live in nanny). im the only tea drinker who lives in the house (grandparents and guest/nannies on playdates also drink it) but they still provide teabags. well technically i provide them, they pay. i have access to their online shopping account and im in charge of mine and my charges food and stuff so i buy 'what i want' for us. if i notice loo roll/washing powder is low i will put it on the shopping, otherwise mb puts it on the shopping but either way she pays for it.
i spend plenty of my own money on food/treats too and if for e.g. im in the deli i will gen use my own money. if going out for lunch i will use float unless i choose to specifically for my benefit or if because i had planned to go home for lunch but ended up eating out i will pay, so i dont feel guilty if one week i have added a pack of crisps to the order or bought that smoked salmon on offer .

Roshbegosh · 12/07/2013 22:23

They sound bloody awful, making you pay for those things, rotten mean. Could you just go and work elsewhere, where you could be valued and treated with respect?

JessMcL · 14/07/2013 02:41

We provide meals for our aupair assuming she will eat the same as us- cooked breakfast, toast or cereal in the morning, selection of soups and plenty of sandwich choice/jacket potato filling for lunch and then evening meal.

If she wants something else she can pay for it herself- she eats chocolate and drinks green tea (only one the house) so when these are brought for her she is expected to pay for them.

JessMcL · 14/07/2013 02:45

I cant believe about basics like loo roll etc. If your agency employed then I would talk to them about it. Are you their first nanny? They genuinly might not realise..?

Strix · 15/07/2013 13:20

None of it, unless your demands are beyond what the rest of the family would get. So if you drink tons of posh cofee flown in from Colombia, then I might let you get your own. But, the food in our house is a free for all. If it isn't labelled "Hands off, Mummy's lunch" or something similar its fair game to everyone.

That being said if I had a nanny / au pair who was consistently putting something on the list, not eating it, and throwing it out when it goes off, I might stop buying because food waste gets on my nerves.

Original poster

confusedalways · 15/07/2013 22:55

I'm desperate to get out but can't find other work.

The family have had other nannies before, are just very tight getting annoyed at our fruit and milk intake etc.

OP posts:

Strix · 16/07/2013 15:18

Maybe you aren't targeting your search in the best way. If you ar elive in, you should be quite flexible on job location, which is obviously harder if you are tied to rent/mortgage.

Or maybe you could increase your skills/training/experience somehow?

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