leaving my Nanny job few qu's... personal/ legal

[gruffaloshild]

I have been with a family for three years, working weekends and a little bit during the week, for various reasons, I have began to want my weekends free and found a week day job which has been offered to me.

I have to hand my notice in and am worried that they will be really hurt that I'm leaving and maybe even angry, as they've always worked hard to meet my needs.

I want a good reference and hope to keep in contact with the children.

I have never had a contract or a job description which has become problematic for me of late, I want to give them a months notice to be fair but just wondered what my legal obligation is to give them as there's no contract in place?

Also I will miss the children terribly and wondered if any nannies have an advice on how to get over what I can imagine to be a kind of grief when I leave?

Just yesterday the little girl didn't want me t leave and er mum said "she'll be back soon", I felt so guilty.

I want to write my notice via email so they have time to digest what I'm saying then we can meet to discuss a hand over and my notice term, maybe I could mention that Id be more than happy to babysit for them still.

Any advice appreciated thanks for reading

The statutory minimum notice from an employee is only one week.

I can't help you on the personal side I am afraid but I hope it goes well

Anchovy speaks as a pro. As a parent, the longer notice you can give, the more it will be appreciated. Strike a balance between former employer who you'll need a ref from and being keen to get to the new employer.
We were gutted when our nanny handed in her notice after 2 yrs and it felt a bit personal to start with because of the very unusual nature of the nanny job. It is however a nanny's career and of course they need to move (made sense for ours to move from school age children to toddlers where she'll be in the job longer and they threw £££ at her), and we do stay in touch and she has the kids over for playdates every now and then.

I would maybe not give your notice via email. There was a thread a while ago, where a nanny had resigned via email and the overwhelming response was that she was out of order/unprofessional/inconsiderate/heartless etc. I know it will be harder to speak to them about it, but I think it's something you need to do. Work out what you want to say first and ask to meet them without the children. Give them a bad new sandwich maybe e.g. you're great and the kids are great etc, I need to move on now, but I can stay until you fins someone new/I'd love to babysit for you still etc

Definitely don't do this on e-mail. But, if you want to be caeful with the wording, you could write out your formal notice in a letter, but ask to meet with them and as you discuss the situation hand the letter over. I think a month's notice is fair in the circumstances.

Just remember to be kind, compassionate, and professional. And, of course, expect the same of them. As a nanny, you have every right to move onto your next job. Your employer should honour that. But, also remember this is a very emotional business for the parents, you, and the children. And sometimes it's difficult to remember where emotion does and doesn't belong.

Good luck. :-)

Okay thanks, I won't do the email thing, I just know they have a tendency to be very reactive (perhaps a little dramatic) so I don't want to get embroiled in a conversation as they do appear to lack boundaries.

At least if I email them, they have time to digest it...?

Strix that's so true, it is emotional for all of us, I play a part in their family dynamic but to be honest they have made it almost impossible for me to thrive in my job, micro-managing me and abusing their power at every opportunity including my working rights, so I have to be careful.

I would hand it in, in writing, as you leave one day which gives then time to read it and calm down, with a very brief explanation that it's your notice and your circumstances have changed.

If it's the Dec thread Outraged means, there were other circumstances there. It wasn't just the emailing in and of itself which was the problem, but other things around it which don't apply to you.

I'm going against the grain here - from how you've described them, I would email them and arrange a time to speak about it OVER THE PHONE. Then go through it then.

I can see why you wouldn't want to do it in person and I wouldn't be critical of a nanny who went about it the way I've described, esp if the children are young and you wouldn't be able to 'speak properly' at theirs after hours so to speak.

Gosh, I really wouldn't do this by email - especially if they will read the email at work. We don't have a nanny, my little girl is in nursery, but I would really struggle to get such bad news and then have to continue the rest of my day at work. If you really can't face talking to them, then leave them a letter when you go for the night - that's a far better idea than doing it by email. I agree with what everyone else says, it sounds like you are ready to move on which is completely reasonable.

How about trying to renegotiate your hours with them first?