Can any CMs give me advice on nap habits?

[scriptbunny]

Hi,

I was wondering if any childminders would mind walking me through how you handle nap-times?

I have a 15mo DS. Currently I just work a few hours part-time and he has a nanny look after him two mornings a week. However some time over the next 6 months we'll have to look at full days, probably three days a week, so I'm thinking of looking for a childminder. The issue is I can't get my head around how nap-time will work.

He's never been a good sleeper and by choice and default he's been raised as a fairly "attached" child (although I tend not to like those sorts of labels). I still bf and he feeds or rocks to sleep at night and when he has naps at home. He'll fall asleep in the buggy if we're out but I try not to have him do that every day.

If he was at a CM, would it be fair to ask her to take on a child who needs to be pushed to sleep? Or am I really looking at re-schooling his sleeping habits before he can go into this sort of care? I tend to assume that everyone else's child naps like a dream but maybe I have it wrong. What are your experiences of helping a child like this transition to napping in a new way?

SB x

I began caring for a 6 month old baby a few weeks ago.When Mum filled in her All about Me forms,she put that she likes to be rocked to sleep,then put down,but as she's a light sleeper,she may wake up again and need rocking again.No can do I'm afraid! I have 2 2 year olds to care for and there is no way I can rock her.I spoke to Mum and she fully understood and I just put her down in the pushchair,rock it a bit then leave her to settle herself.
To be honest it would help your childminder a great deal if your little one didnt need cuddling to sleep-it would make their job easier especially if she has others to care for.You can still cuddle him to pieces at home!
By the way,thank you for thinking about this beforehand!

I have a 20 month old who comes to me and would prefer to be cuddled but, as me and her mum have agreed, she has to self soothe after a nice cuddle, story etc as I have other children here. She is fine with this and settles within 10 minutes. Your little one may adjust better than you think to this in another setting, but I would possibly try and put a level of self soothing in place. Childminders are quite likely to be able to offer a more adaptable setting and will be able to discuss with you options and techniques you can use together. There may also be childminders who have no other young children in their setting and your little one may be the only one there during school hours.

I personally could not take it on if the parents weren't happy to attempt self soothing, but would be happy to discuss... I would just be upfront and do some local research

The child may be totally different for the cm, I have one who is a nightmare at home, runs riot smashing the house up and not going to sleep. If I put her to bed I don't hear a peep out of her even when she wakes up she just lies there until I go in!

I sometimes find a child likes this settles faster in a cot next to another child who is a reliable sleeper.

I have a little one who is exactly as HSMM just said - troublesome to settle alone but fine sleeping alongside his new best friend.

My DS naps in his cot at home for 2 hours. At the CM he fights sleep and may have 30 mins in the pushchair on the school run if we're lucky! My CM was very accommodating to try to get him to sleep, but nothing works so that's the way it goes!

Thanks so much for all your stories and insights. I think I'm going to try a little gentle nudge to see if he can start to be a bit more independent. I do get Vietnam-style flashbacks when I think back to my early appalling attempts at sleep-training when he was a young fella but I guess I'll just have to trust that he's moved on and we're both ready for something new. It is definitely good to know that not all childminded wee ones are perfect nappers. Like you say, sooner or later we'll just have to try, and it may help him nap better, or it may not. I've learnt never to second guess my boy and his sleep!

Thanks again.

SBx

hi im a cm to a2yr old and a 1yr old they dont have a routine at home bedtimes 10pm so during the day they both need asleep some days i have to cuddle or rock the 1yr old and other days he falls asleep in the buggy.so we are all different maybe when you find a cm ,you can tell her this and to start off until she gets used to him she may rock him.sorry i have the time because i have theser two full time and no one else!

As others have said, children often behave completely differently in childcare to the way that they do at home, so I wouldn't worry too much about it. If you try to change the way you do nap times at home, you may find it much more of a struggle than a cm would (who doesn't have the whole previous history with him of bfing, rocking to sleep etc).

I have a 20 mo mindee at the moment who I push to sleep - she used to nap really easily, then after the summer we had a bad patch with her refusing to nap and getting very over-tired, and now I've found that if I exhaust her at the playground in the mornings, then push her round the supermarket at about 12 o'clock this usually bores her to sleep & I can stock up with bread & milk etc before going to do the nursery pick-up! It's not a problem for me at all, and is miles the most straightforward way to get her off to sleep.

It depends on the childminder you find, but it's perfectly possible that they'll be in & out with the buggy at set times of day doing school & nursery pick-ups anyway, so you might find that he ends up adjusting his nap to fit in with whatever their routine happens to be.

My DS is exactly as you describe and our CM has been fantastic. He sleeps in a cot at home but never for longer than 45mins. He won't sleep in a cot at her house but he will sleep in a buggy in the living room and she rocks it to get him to sleep.He sometimes only has 30mins a day but he sometimes sleeps for more than an hour for her which is unheard of at home. I explained to her that he was a poor napper when I met her so she knew what she was taking on and I am happy for her to try whatever techniques she thinks are best to get him to sleep. Good luck, I am SO happy with our CM and I feel so lucky to have found her.