So annoyed - bosses are so tight!!

[NorthernNanny]

I spent a day with my new charge and her mum last week to get her used to me and finalise a few things before I start properly next week.

I let MB know in the interview that the going charge is 40p per mile for petrol, going up to 45p as of tomorrow, she turned around last week and said that they wouldn't be paying me any more than 30p per mile, yet she's been saying she wants me to take the little girl (14months) to certain places which are miles away.

THEN at lunchtime she asked if I'd bought lunch with me, I said no and she looked SO put out - I felt really uncomfortable, apologised and said I could pop to the shops and buy my own lunch, she said ok at first and then said "it's fine, i'll give you a sandwich today but from now on, i'd expect you to bring your own lunch" - MB isnt going back to work until May and will be with me and charge until then - again, I only found this out last week and am not particularly happy about it - she will be making lunch for herself, I really don't see what harm a sandwich could do?!

In interview, I told her how much money I would be looking for - they managed to knock me down by £1 an hour - a lot less that I wanted but the days and hours are perfect for me and I thought that, after a year I could always ask for more.

It just really upset me that I'm going to give her daughter the best care possible and all this is making me feel like cheap labour - I agreed to a large drop in pay and they just seem to be taking the mickey a bit.

Sorry it's a long one but would love to hear from anyone with any thoughts on this. Thank you.

Your next employer would only find out about your previous employer if you give her your P45, which has the employer's name on it.

If you say you have lost it/never received it, (both of which happen all the time) she will get you to fill in a form P46, which doesn't ask for this information.

I wish I'd have seen you initial posting, I would have advised not to touch the job with a barge pole.

Hopefully you will sort something out soon, there are good families out there who wouldn;t treat you this way.

Good luck

P45 (manual version) says on it:
"If you do not want your new employer to know the details on this form, send it to your HM Revenue & Customs (HMRC) office immediately with a letter saying so and giving the name and address of your new employer. HMRC can make special arrangements, but you may pay too much tax for a while as a result of this."

When I've started new jobs I've often not had a P45 available at the time, so completed a P46 and subsequently gave employer the P45. So in the same way, you could complete a P46 and once you have P45 send it direct to your tax office (see P60 which you should have by now for current employment, or should have by end of this month for details of tax office name).

Think that is right... MrAnchovy may correct me if I'm wrong