Returning to work after second child and finding childcare impossible

[cesoir]

I'm returning to work almost 14 months after the birth of my daugher. I have chosen to do this because my husband and I are struggling to live on his salary, and much like everyone else in these times, are up to our eyeballs in debt.

So I've managed to get a terrific job offer with a mid-November start, with a fair salary of £37k. I've even found a nanny who I think is great who has a net rate of £750 p/h. But then when I have to add tax, and NI, and employers NI I have to pay her £47 a month more than I earn!!!!

If I put them both in nursery I'm pretty much taking home £300 BEFORE my travel and lunch. It's not even worth the heartache.

How do people do this??? I 'm failing to see any light at the end of the tunnel other than to turn the job down, and I worked so so hard to get it.

My son is nearly 4 and attends the local school from 9-11.30 every morning and until end of day for 1 day. My 13 month daughter is home with me.

I've thought about getting an au pair but I've read that they can't look after the children for longer than 5 hours at a time, and that they cannot have sole charge of children under 2. And yet, I see lots of positions advertising au pair positions with toddlers.

Also, I've been looking at aupair.com and seen some candidates that seem perfect. Does anyone have any experience of this site? Is it a reputable way to find an au pair? What checks do I need to do if I choose to not go through any agency?

So many questions! Does anybody have any advice? xxxxxxxx

childminder? could be cheaper than nanny.

nanny share - if you can find one that fits - or a nanny with her own child = pay is less than one without.

Can you use childcare vouchers? £243 per month before tax I think.Will the nanny be ofsted registered or willing to be?
Your son will be in full time school soon, leaving childcare for one. Can you afford to do it for a couple of years earning very little, it will be worth it when both children are at school and all you have to pay for is holiday clubs and after school.
Have you a local flexible childminder, most will except vouchers.

Are you saying that you will pay more than 37k a year to a nanny or have I read that wrong?
I'm sure you could find a cheaper option.

Cesoir - . You need to make it worth your while to leave your dc's. Why are you doing it? Because you want to get back into work and stay on the career ladder? (Just random questions). How much input will dp/dh have, equal finances/responsibilites to dc's?
Can you return to work when they are at least in full time education??

Mine were both very young when I found myself back at work full time with a mediocre salary. I used a childminder which is way more reasonable than a trained nanny, and then an afterschool club for which I got some wtc (lone parent).

Not much help I know, but ask yourself some questions. You need to think of what you want,for you and dc's. I'll say one thing, it won't be a party. But I guess you know that.

As others said it is only for a short time. Is it better for you to put up with a lower income/ more debt ,but less hassle and then return to work later. Or is yours the type of career it will be difficult to get back into ? Will gaps in your CV matter ? Only you can answear these questions.

Maybe see if you can find someone to share the nanny with - have a look at nannyshare.co.uk.

childminder.

if you are working f/t then an au pair is not an option.

Nanny share is prob your best bet if you've already found a nanny you like. Or a live-in nanny?

Childminder would be cheaper than a nanny so that's an option.

People do use au pairs to care for young babies and work more than 5 hours a week but are not supposed to. It often means the au pair is working for a very low wage, your children are not getting the best care and qualified,trained nannies are being priced out of the market...if you can live with all that then it's the way to go. Depends on your morals really!

if you earn £37k you take home £27,454k...

im pretty sure you could find a nanny for less than £27k gross (although once you add in mileage allowance, childrens activites, toddler groups etc you might not get muhc change, but would probably be doing these groups anyway)

with your £243 a month (£2916) childcare vouchers

unless you require very long hours you should be able to find a decent nanny for less than £30k!

(although i can see why it seems pointless to work full time, if you only bring home a tiny bit extra a month, and have the hassel of not seeing your children, and dealing with sickness etc etc)

a childminder should be a cheaper option, and it wont be that many months before your eldest is a school and which point childcare costs would reduce (if you used a CM / nursery) but you salary wont

Hi everyone. To answer some of your questions...

my salary of £37k has tax and NI taken off as it is a gross salary, whereas the nanny has a net salary so you have to add it on. So it basically equates to the same amount of money.

I've tried nannyshare but there are actually so few families on it. I had one who were willing to share but have sinced changed their plans, one who won't call me back, and another who wants to share, but just two days - and when the hourly rate goes up because its a share, those 2 days don't really make much difference.

I have thought about a childminder, and been looking for some local options, so I'll see how that works out financially.

In terms of career, I do really need to keep the ball rolling. And also, as much as I adore my children, I'm finding it really hard to be a full time mum. I work in the music industry so I have a really fun job, and those part time positions just aren't there either.

Thanks everyone for your advice xx

Have you worked your figures out right. If earning £37k then a nanny earning £7.50 nett shouldn't cost you more than your salary

maybe nick can do some more sums for you

I think you need to work out what you can afford to pay in childcare and go from there

think a cm or a nannyshare would be your best option

do you have room for a live in nanny as thus would keep the cost down

Could granny/dh help out one day to save childcare costs

and def look into using vouchers

Crossed posts but still think you need to work out what you can afford

and obv what area depends on local salarys etc

getting a nanny for £20k gross about 300 nett

have a look on netmums and nannyjob

where are you op?

why are you offering the nanny a net salary? (it's a real pita for your accounting)
offer a gross salary that you can afford and let nannytax or whoever work out the deductions.

it's very tempting to go for the highly qualified norland-esque experienced nanny, but tbh if you register with a few agencies you can usually get a good range of applicants, some of whom will be prepared to accept a lower salary.

i would be thinking longer term though - when your eldest child starts school (it's realy not that far away) you need to be looking at practicialities as well as funds - ie is there an after school club, or will he need collecting?

if you can go for a cm/ nursery combo, the cost will decrease significantly in less than 12 mos. if you go for a nanny, you're in it for the long haul with no cost reduction.

I've found the nanny through an agency, as I was concerned about safety checks etc. They've told me that all nannies work in net and when we go to contract that changes to gross. The lady I have found has not been a nanny before, but has 21 years of nursery experience. Her rate is £7.50 net, but I can't find another nanny for that low a rate. In London it seems like a minimum of £9 net.

£7.50 net is cheap for a nanny tbh, particularly if you're in London. Maybe you've miscalculated how much the gross wage would be? It seems a lot for £7.50 net.

I'd go for a cm/nursery combination or just a cm. When your older dc starts attending school full time it will decrease the price quite a bit. Trust me, on a salary of £37K, a nanny will be very very expensive.

10 hours a day for 5 days @ £7.50 p/h = £2,334 pcm according to the nannytax calculator. My take home is £2,287.

I think maybe I seek a private nanny if I cant find a childminder with an advertised gross salary and see how that works.

Been looking for CM on childcare.co.uk but nobody has 5 day vacancies for 2 children.

ARGH

Childminders are CRB checked and registered with the local authority.

oops x post

where in london?

SOuth East London - Hither Green/Lewisham

50 hours a week at 7.50 = 375net = 489 gross per week = £2123 gross per month (25476 gross per year)

from here

u can use £243 vouchers so you only pay £1880 from your salary, so you still are £400 ish better off by working

agree it is most of your salary but it is not all your salary

btw, both you AND DH/DP can claim for childcare vouchers, so £243 off BOTH salaries would be a big lump sum towards the nanny's wages...

Have you looked at various nurseries nearby? They do vary in price.