Returning to work after second child and finding childcare impossible

[cesoir]

I'm returning to work almost 14 months after the birth of my daugher. I have chosen to do this because my husband and I are struggling to live on his salary, and much like everyone else in these times, are up to our eyeballs in debt.

So I've managed to get a terrific job offer with a mid-November start, with a fair salary of £37k. I've even found a nanny who I think is great who has a net rate of £750 p/h. But then when I have to add tax, and NI, and employers NI I have to pay her £47 a month more than I earn!!!!

If I put them both in nursery I'm pretty much taking home £300 BEFORE my travel and lunch. It's not even worth the heartache.

How do people do this??? I 'm failing to see any light at the end of the tunnel other than to turn the job down, and I worked so so hard to get it.

My son is nearly 4 and attends the local school from 9-11.30 every morning and until end of day for 1 day. My 13 month daughter is home with me.

I've thought about getting an au pair but I've read that they can't look after the children for longer than 5 hours at a time, and that they cannot have sole charge of children under 2. And yet, I see lots of positions advertising au pair positions with toddlers.

Also, I've been looking at aupair.com and seen some candidates that seem perfect. Does anyone have any experience of this site? Is it a reputable way to find an au pair? What checks do I need to do if I choose to not go through any agency?

So many questions! Does anybody have any advice? xxxxxxxx

I run a maternity and nanny agency - one suggestion is a nannyshare which may help you manage the costs a bit better.

Sorry to correct you, but the £243 of childcare vouchers is a salary sacrifice, the cash you save is only the tax on the £243, which as a basic rate tax payer is about £48 a month, it's not the whole £243 !

So, if you are taking home 2,287, you will take 243 off that and be left with 2,044. You will not pay tax on that 243 so can add back 48, but will still be paying £1880 for the nanny and taking home 2,092.

I was in a similar situation and it was cheaper for us to use a nursery. Typically our local nursery would charge £1,620 for two children on full-time places which is pretty good in fact for where it is (Cobham). I suspect though that a childminder would be even cheaper, great if you can find a good one.

I agree that you will save signficantly when your eldest goes to school, so I do not think a nanny is a good option, after school care is much cheaper. I spent a couple of years working and hardly making anything, but it was worth it to keep my hand in and my role was very good (25 hours per week) so it was worth doing.

Good luck !!

We worked it out so that we knew what we could afford on my return to work salary net amount and then looked at our options. We were 'just' managing on my DH's salary so that did make the money calculation easier as it was 'just' my salary to look at.
What we're going to do if I have another baby is another matter - we'd like to keep continuity during maternity, but with no salary to pay for it, we'd have to use our savings, such as they are.
It is so hard, but you should think very hard before usng an au pair to care for such a small child alone for anything more than a short time each week.
I know it's taboo, but lots of time in nursery is not great for kids under 3, so cm or nanny is better.
Maybe the best bet is combo childcare, but again there can be issues if there's too much variety in the people who're doing the caring.

Recent Guardian article here

Hi cesoir, I had a mum contact me on childcare.co.uk who quickly realised that even my lowest rate was beyond her.

Allthough she had a young baby and was going back to work full time she talked of getting an aupair. I emailed her back and begged her not to go down this route for such a young child for such long hours and suggested that a childminder would be a safe and better option than an aupair.

At the risk of seeming a busybody I have seen too many unsuitable young girls without a clue being used as cheap labour and yes it does price nannies and childminders out of the market.

The mum did come back to me and thanked me for the advice as she hadn't realised aupairs weren't meant to do full time childcare

As well as paying the Nanny's gross salary, you must remember to factor in the cost of Employer's NI. So I think the OP is right, she would struggle to earn enough to pay a nanny.