Gas and Air: come share your funny stories here

[foxytocin]

I have none myself but I need a laugh and you'll relieve some anxieties from the first timers lurking.

These stories are so funny, I couldn't take G&A for labour as made me sick but had some for stiches, remember saying to the midwife I don't know if my fango lips are numb but my mouth lips are!

Omg lovebugs am howling with laughter on the train with tears running down my face - I shall have a whole carriage to myself soon, everyone is edging away lol

I'm a bit worried about having G&A now..... Had epidural last time so no need. I'm sure I'd come out with all sorts of shit

After a good few whiffs of G+A with DD, I somehow thought I was in an Indian restaurant and tried to order a chicken korma and a naan from ex-p. With DS and a nice shot of pethedine, I hallucinated Jimi Hendrix coming out of the hospital curtains coming to get me. They were horrible 60s paisley-patterned curtains, which might explain it.

I kept shouting at my MW that another transaction was coming until I was told the banks didn't open until the morning.
I also saw the gurney wheels morph into our pet cat and then into a rat.
The final staw came when I was convinced my husband's sister survived only on Special K and that it was a miracle she was still alive.
Hmm... Gas and air was good stuff.

I had a really random MN moment - it made sense to me at the time...

With DS2, after about 36 hrs of attempted induction, the registrar suggested trying to break my waters, but was concerned that my cervix was still quite high and it would be very uncomfortable for me.

I was very committed to trying to get my VBAC, so said if I could have G&A she could do what she wanted and she had no problem with that...although she looked a bit concerned.

DH sat next to me on the bed, holding my hand, facing me and I could see registrar down the other end...

I had a good few puffs and was floating away and she's shoving and poking and asking if I'm ok, I'm using sign language to indicate to DH that I'm ok and to keep going and he's relaying this

All of a sudden, I get a jeffing image of Justin Fletcher and the fact that some of you wierd MN'ers think he's horny, whilst she's rummaging around very, very deep in my fanjo....and got the most ridiculous fit of giggles...the MW suggested I'd had enough G&A as I was now crying with laughter and I'm still signing to DH not to let her stop until she's done the job when she finally manages to break my waters.

DS2 still ended up a CS, but the 48 hr VBAC attempt was worth it for the G&A!

Wonder if you could have G&A parties?

I had it once with the first and I was convinced that all my limbs came off like barbies do and the MW was filling them full of helium.

Did growl at her when she suggested that it wasn't that painful and bit the husband when he tried to take it off me.I kept trying to get out of the hospital and to the cinema as there was some film I had booked tickets for and I wanted to go and see it.

Pethadine is another matter made me hallucinate to the point of terror.

Morphine into a vein is a real fun rush I rang himself up when they gave me some for a stomach bug and he had to get the nurse who was with me to try to decipher what I said.

Think I overdid it on the G&A, sat there sucking like a fiend, turned to DH and said 'have a drag, this is good sh*t' and kept asking the midwives if they had more while I kept one eye firmly on the guage to make sure I didnt run out. Had a great time, was a breeze till it all went wrong - but that's not funny and all was well in the end. I have fond memories of labour and G&A.

During a 40 odd hour induction attempt, I must have sucked half the hospitals resource of gas and air. After being on the stuff for about 14 hours, and already accusing the MW and dp of playing rave music (apparently the beeping of machines blending into each other), in comes the anaesthatist (sp) with the epidural. I became convinced she went to school with me, and was babbling on at her as she was poking around in my back, about who she used to sit next to in Maths, how our teacher was a prick, and to top it off I divulged I had never shagged any of the boys in school as I was a swot. Dp was mortified, and said the anaesthatist was absolutely pissing herself laughing. I also asked the consultant when he was doing an internal, did I have a tight you know what, and told him in detail and with much pride about my pelvic floor exercises. Am still ashamed now!

Lovebugs am crying with laughter.....

Me too!