Support thread for those of us who are requesting an ELCS after a previous traumatic delivery

[withorwithoutyou]

Hello everyone.

I have noticed a lot of threads regarding requesting ELCS lately, probably because I am in the process of trying to request one myself!

I just wondered if it might be useful for us to have a support thread where we can talk this all through as I know it can be a challenging process to go through.

Can I please also ask in the nicest possible way that anybody contributing to this thread can respect our desire for ELCS over VB? Thank you!

Anyway, I'll start - I have one DD, born 20 months ago by forceps after failed ventouse. She weighed 9 pounds 11 and I am concerned this one will be heavier! I am 30 weeks and have my first consultants appt tomorrow where I will be requesting an ELCS!

Thanks for the tips - I'll be writing out a little spiel this weekend in preparation for Tuesday. Feel like I'm leaving it a bit late, but I've still got 9 weeks until EDD so should be fine.

Wow BagofHolly, twins how fantastic - congratulations and best of luck.

aaagggghhh went to wholesalers today and the lady said to me- 'o u not dropped that sprog yet!' i said 'no having 'it' on the 29th' wen she knew it was c-sect said 'o to posh to push r u?? god they will give u c-sect for anything these days!!'

call me hormonal but could have punched the bitch in the face! what the fu@k does she no!! aaaaggghhh

Gosh what a cheeky cow! My section was for placenta previa but my husband's friend's wife said "too posh to push." I couldn't be arsed explaining the structure of my uterus so I just smiled and said "Yes. I am."
Daft cow.

sophie you should have punched her, bitch troll woman, i have had a couple of too posh to push comments already, people are just so rude and it should be slapped out of them

Hi everyone,just popped in to say I hope it's all going well for everyone.

It's 12 weeks today since my section and I keep looking back and thinking what a great experience it was. Can't believe how quickly the time is going, my little newborn is growing up so quickly! Noticed today she already has her first tooth! DD1 was 7 months before she had one but DD2 has one at not even 3 months! Making breastfeeding a bit painful though!

Looking forward to some more birth stories soon - Sophie, wishing you lots of luck if I don't get back on before your ELCS date.

so glad u had such a positive experiance,hopefully in 12 weeks i will be saying the same!

had my pre-op app today, so this time next week will def have my baby!

p.s i thought i had killed the thread for a moment!!

hello, i haven't posted on this thread in a while as have had a fairly eventful pregnancy to say the least!

anyway, saw a registrar at the hospital last week who tried to talk me out of an elcs but i stuck to my guns and he said, well it's your body and at the end of the day your choice

I feel so much better after this. i have to have a growth scan at 28 weeks and on the same day i am booked into see the consultant who has the power to say a definite yes to an elcs.

my question is, because the registrar basically said he would have no probs with me having the cs, will i meet anymore resistance from the consultant? she has the last word as it were so should i be prepared for a fight?

also, what is the difference between a registrar and a consultant?

Got my date!!!

Yeehaa!

Am so so so so chuffed.
Saw midwife who was doing check up etc and she saw on my notes that I was due to talk to consultant as it had 'keen for elcs' on my notes.
She reviewed it all with me and looked at reasons for last EMCS (due to fetal distress, mild pre-eclampsia and huge baby!) then told me I should be ok for a VBAC! She totally tried to change my mind!! After all the weeks I have had of umming and ahhing over whether I was doing the right thing.
I have done a lot of research and had so much resolve until I went into that room (showed me just how vulnerable I am feeling at the mo), she so very easily could have just bullied me into it.

Luckily however, we were there to talk to doctor and not her (she was just doing all the paperwork). Doc swept in, basically said 'we think it's best you have ELCS, although we would support you if you chose VBAC'....she also very honestly explained that VBAC was prob not best due to problems last time which would most prob occur this time, leading to EMCS. She was so honest and brilliant and made me feel all at once that I had chosen the right path! It was excellent!

Bloody midwife nearly knocked me right off kilter! Bloody midwife

So that's it - 1st of November. 9.00a.m.

It's so nice knowing what's happening now and that I have been supported in the choice I made. I feel justified. Vindicated. Awesome!!

Still shocked/annoyed at midwife though.

nanbullen- i would say u will get what u want, its hard to feel postive about the whole thiing untill u get a date, but stick to ur guns if this is what u want xx

threelittleducks- that is brilliant news, takes such a huge weight off ur shoulders doesnt it- roll on 1st nov for u xx

i have mine weds- aaaghhhhh

Hi all,

have been a bit of a lurker although have posted about my decision to go for an ELCS (which is tomorrow - yikes!)

Am having a few last minute wobbles and wondered if anyone whose recently had a section can reassure me. I will be 39+1 tom and am worrying that although I know the baby is term, an elective means the hormones needed for labour aren't around yet - does that have any impact on the baby at all? i.e. will it be in shock at suddenly being dragged out of the womb?! I know I should have thought about this before but you know how it is - so many things to think about!

am just concerned that I've made this decision for me as it was so awful last time without thinking of how it might impact on baby - I am being silly arent't I????

Hi ginger - Good luck for tomorrow! I am now 15 weeks post elcs and still looking back at it in amazement, it was enjoyable and I am loving having DS here. My recovery has gone really smoothly and I feel so well in contrast to last time.

If you read above you'll see hazeyjane's DS needed scbu for a while as his lungs were not ready at 39 weeks. I think everyone else has had no problems with their baby's health at all.

My DS was born at 39 weeks exactly by elcs and came out yelling his head off, with good agpar scores and weighing a healthy 8lb8 (DD was 7lb10 at nearly 42 weeks). I was relieved he came out with his lungs clearly in great working order, but I also felt my elcs was far safer for him than possibly getting stuck as DD did. We were very fortunate that DD didn't have longterm damage from the low oxygen during her birth - and she was also fairly bruised by the forceps which can sometimes cause permanent damage.

I quite understand your concerns - but how it affects you also affects the baby. I don't think any of them like being turfed out whether elcs or vb! It's a shock to them and a calm mother able to focus on their needs must make a big difference. I was far more able and together emotionally with DS's birth than I was after DD's traumatic one.

I won't say 'Oh it'll be fine' because if you are like me then false comforts are no use after a bad birth experience. However the vast, vast majority of elcs babies at 39 weeks are well matured to cope outside. They used to do elcs's earlier than that - and still do in some cases for medical reasons - but at the moment the research suggests that 39 weeks is a good balance between the need for the lungs to develop as much as possible, and the need to avoid going into labour and it becoming an emcs.

Hope it all goes wonderfully for you tomorrow. Let us know when you can

Thanks for the reply Lovethesea - v reassuring. You are right of course - my DD was also born with horrible forceps marks (but by EMCS in the end) and I was a mess for ages afterwards, both physically and in hindsight mentally too so this is the right decision - just getting a bit nervous!

thanks again

Nanbullen - I think a consultant is more senior than a registrar but if you explain to the consultant that the registrar has said it should be ok then that should help.

Threelittleducks - congratulations!! What a weight off your mind.

Ginger2000 - I can only tell you the difference between my two DD's births and how they were afterwards:

DD1 - failed ventouse, eventual forceps delivery, cord round neck, haematoma on head, brusies on face, screamed and screamed and screamed for two hours after she was born (and I mean SCREAMED). Finally passed out then screamed on and off pretty much all night between feeding (badly) and sleeping. Very unsettled baby for months aferwards.

DD2 - ELCS, little cry as soon as she was born. Given to her Dad and settled straight away, looked around the room, taking it all in, gazed at me contentedly while I was being stitched up. Fed well in recovery, drifted off to sleep quite happily. Still the most laid back, chilled out and happy little girl I have ever met.

I understand the lung concern thing, and I was worried too but we had no issues whatsoever there - DD2 coughed up hardly any mucous in the days after she was born, probably less than DD1 did, thinking about it.

Oh, and good luck ginger! xx

Thanks for your info withorwithoutyou. Its so good to hear how positive your ELCS was and how different your children were after birth. DD wasn't traumatised by her birth experience (although how on earth would I know - getting stuck in your mum's pelvis after 5 hours of pushing, followed by someone pulling at your head with tongs and then pulling you out of the birth canal, and into an operating theatre via a c-section must be pretty traumatic for a baby!) but its comforting to hear your story.

I had a look at hazyjane's posts - i guess there are risks in every kind of birth and we won't know until the morning how this little one will cope with it all. Can't actually believe that hopefully this time tomorrow, I will have had it!!

Thanks for the good wishes and good luck to others due for ELCS this week.

Ginger 2000, hopefully you are in bed resting before your big day tomorrow!

However, if you do see this, I just wanted to say that I saw ds's consultant last week, to review his chest. She is convinced that there must have been some confusion over dates, she also thinks that because dd1 and 2 were both 2 weeks overdue, this could be a contributing factor into why ds had problems. He showed other minor signs of being premature (jaundice, some remaining lanugo, reflux). This scenario would obviously be fairly unusual. She also said that the fact that he was fairly big (8lb 9oz), and I am small (4'11") meant that he may very well have ended up a c-section anyway.

I have been having some issues with ds's birth and my reasons for having a c-section, but having seen the consultant last week and the physio the day before (she emphasised the importance of scar massage - I had been too freaked out to touch mine), I feel so much better about the whole thing.

I really hope that my experience hasn't given you the heebie jeebies, if this thread is anything to go by, I am very much in the minority.

Oh and ds is now 13 weeks old, and just lovely, he is growing well, melts hearts with his smile and is worshipped by our 2 dds.

Good luck for tomorrow, can't wait to hear how it goes.

Hazeyjane, I'm glad the consultant gave you some comforting information and I'm delighted to hear that DS is so spoilt by his sisters. Those smiles are so powerful aren't they?

I hope in time you feel really at peace with it all, it is so hard when you are dealing with the unknown other path (ie would it have ended with an emcs and how would that have affected DS, how would your body have coped this time with a vb, how would you have been longterm etc).

I found the counselling I had from the maternity psychologist really helpful before DS's birth. I am certain there would be something similar available once you are physically well enough, if you thought that would help with processing all these emotions.

Thinking of you.

Good luck ginger!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Good luck to everyone who has elcs this week- will be thinkig of you all. Really cannot wait for mine now. It's only 5 weeks away now. It's so unreal and so very reassuring. Makes everything else so much easier to deal with somehow - light at the end of a a long hard road for me.

Thanks for all the well wishes. I am home with beautiful dd2 48 hours after the ELCS on Mon. She is perfect and so was the ELCS! so calm as others have said and i can tell my recovery will be so much better than last time!

I saw her being born as they lowered the screen for me (once they used the forceps to dislodge her from my pelvis which made me very relieved i didn't try for a vbac!)which was amazing - as was having a good look at the placenta/cord as they sewed me up!

Thanks again for all your words of encouragement and support - this was totally the right decision!

Hi there, I've been lurking on here for ages but wanted some advice as how to deal with my consultant appintment.

I had my DS at 42+1 after a 26hr labour. He was a planned home birth that ended up in hospital with a drip, failed ventouse and keillands and simpsons forceps in theatre as he was back to back and had his chin sticking out. I ended up with an episiotomy turning into a 3rd degree tear.

My son was battered and bruised and still has a scar under his eye form the forceps and he had a huge caput on his head for ages. All in all it was quite a traumatic delivery and although I am currently booked for another homebirth, due to continuing faecal incontinence issues several midwives have informed me that at my 20 week consultant appointment I'll be recommended to go for a section.

My problem is although I accept the birth I had and in fact felt completely informed and respected at every point, the post natal care I received was horrendous. I was threatened by a midwife that my 8lb14 baby with an apgar score of 10 would get brain damage if I did not top him up with formula, I was prevented from breast feeding except from once every four hours, the midwive once in the night took my baby away to top him up with formula and never brought him back and when I went looking for him half an hour later a strange woman not in uniform in the staff room was holding him and complained that I wanted him back. They tried to give me heparin that was for another patient and for two days had two drug charts running for me.

The point is every time I think of having to stay alone in this hospital I start crying. Our hospital will let partners stay over if you are in your own room but section patients have to spend the first night on a ward. Has anyone heard of people being allowed to stay in their own room from the first night and can anyone help me come up with arguments as to why they should let me please?

My appointment's on the 26th of October

Help, at my 36 week appointment yesterday I raised the issue of my wanting an ELCS due to suffering from really bad SPD, I was not even able to get an appointment with a consultant as apparently all consultant clinics are currently suspended due to being 'chock-a-block'. I was told that I would just have to wait until I had gone into labour and then ask to discuss it with a consultant on the delivery ward! I am seriously stressed and anxious about this as I doubt I will be listened to on the day... What shall I do, can I be refused the right to even see a consultant like this?

Hi all just wanted to say thanks again to everyone who has posted so helpfully here. This thread gave me the confidence to think I had a reasonable case for ELCS and ask for it.

I had my consultant (actually just saw registrar) appointment yesterday (23 weeks) and we went through the long (8hr) second stage timeline of first birth and reasons why it ended in rotational forceps(basically bad luck - baby ended up in worst possible position) He started saying that I would now only be left to labour for 2 hours once fully dilated and I said "actually I have asked to be referred as I would like a section this time - I have made these notes if you would like to have a read".

The response was "yes I will read them but I will say now that I am going to agree to a section" I can't believe I didn't have to fight for it and I am so relieved. I may have cried had I not had DS with me!! Its all booked for 39 weeks on 24 January! I have also been referred to clinic for post natal review of whether pelvic floor repair surgery needed.

Sorry funnymummy I don't really have any experience of getting ELCS on grounds of SPD.

dee78 My post birth health problems sound similar to yours. Do you want an ELCS, is it just the post natal care bit putting you off, in that you don't want to stay in the hospital for a long time?

Congratulations ginger on your ELCS, and hope others go well!

I just wanted to thank everyone who has posted on here - it is really useful to hear others experiences. I only had DD 3 weeks ago, so a potential ELCS for DC2 is a long way off. I am scheduled for an op next week to restitch some of the damage from DD's birth and my lovely gynecologist has said that she doesn't think any obstetrician would refuse me an ELCS next time given the damage I have sustained this time (though not as bad as some mumsnetters have had and DD was delivered safely which I am extremely grateful for). She also said that it would be my choice and that a VB for the next one might be fine.

Congratulations and well done Ginger!

Any news from Sophie yet?

crumblequeen I'm so glad you're meeting with the consultant went well, you must be feeling so relieved now. It makes me feel much more hopeful for my appointment too. I have now accepted that to not have an ELCS would be foolish and am ok with having one, I am just petrified of being on the post-natal ward again unable to move properly and reliant on their staff. I now have a meeting arranged with the head of the post natal ward at the beginning of November to go over my past care. Apparently this will reassure me it won't happen again. I don't know how she thinks she'll be able to do this as all the things I have problems with were against their policies anyway so shouldn't have happened the first time.