girls - i need honesty - state of fanjo after childbirth?

[scaredmummytobe]

I have namechanged as I am sooooo embarassed mortified to ask this but I daren't ask any of my RL friends! I daren't even ask my midwife

I am 4 months pregnant with my first child, planning a natural birth. But I am really scared as I have heard some horror stories about what happens "down there" once you have given birth.

I know that (obviously) things get VERY stretched down there as baby is coming out and sometimes mums-to-be need assistance, ie, forceps, episeotomies (sp?) etc, and I have heard that once you have had a baby things never look the same down there, ie, everything is more kind of, poking out

I have also heard things are a lot more "slack" - in fact my friend's OH "joked" to my dp that sex with my friend since their 2 DC's is like "chucking a sausage up the high street" insensitive twat emoticon and in this weeks Closer mag there is some z-list "celeb" in there (think its a page 3 girl) saying she is going for vaginal surgery to make herself tighter down there since having her DD.

I really want the experience of labour and birth, I can't wait to meet my baby but I am petrified of the possible carnage down below ...me and dp have a great sex life at the moment and I don't want that to change.

So I would like to know what other people's experiences have been like, so I know what to expect.

Sorry for graphicness and I hope I haven't upset anyone! but I am sure I am not the only one to ever have worried about this!

ps Ive been seeing a physio since October and do pelvic floor exercises 2 or 3 times a day

I am a trifle disconcerted by the fact that Mooncups come in a larger size for women who are over 30 or have had a vaginal delivery. I am a few months off 30 and no baby as yet... am I in for a nasty shock at 30 and an even nastier one post-birth?! Did anyone find they needed a new Mooncup upon either of these events?

If it was truly that different after giving birth then none of us would ever get pg again.

For the vast majority it's absolutely fine, I had a tiny prem baby then a vast full term baby. No difference after either of them.

Pelvic floor exercise is a must, before after, whenever. Had episiotomy and second degree tear. Took 4 months before I felt ok and honestly I looked like the Dr had sewn with a blindfold on. DH though said he didn't feel any difference and can't say he spends alot of time really scrutinising down there. Hes just glad to be allowed back. After DS same again but healed after 3 weeks and actually looks alot better this time. Shame I'm not having another I might look like I used to eventually.