c-section a must, if refused i'll need to pay, advise on getting c-section on nhs or paying the nhs in wales, or private c-section in wales

[Ema76]

a c-section is a must for me.
i am really worried that i will be refused one on the nhs. if so i have to have options. can i pay the nhs to give me one? really want to have my baby in wales too which restricts me as it seems more private c-sections are done in London.
Does anyone know of a good private hospital in wales (south in particular) and how much it would cost?

Many thanks for your help.

it says in my letter jimjam - prob because my midwife has requested an elective cs on my referral form.

bethoo - what do you wish? whatever it is surely it should be discussed talk to your midwife

they do not usually discuss the birth til nearer the due date as alot can happen in that length of time.

Just wanted to wish you all the very best and hope you get the support you need. I know from personal experience that c-sections can be risky - I've had two. But the last one saved my baby's life, he had a knot in the umbilical cord which I and the dr were unaware of. Personally, I think in your circumstances that you shouldn't be slatted for your choice, you have obviously given this much thought. Best of luck

I had an emergency section with dd1, was fine, recovery fine, no complications

had VBAC with dd2, was fine, recovery fine, no complications

sections do NOT have to involve a long recovery, I was up and out of bed the same day, no pain relief etc

I would stress though - like all the other posters - the importance of you LISTENING to your consultant

mine recommended a VBAC - I wasn't bothered either way tbh - if he had recommended a section, I would have gone with that

they really are the experts and no doubt will recommend counselling

"I am still having a cs".
You sound like you know what is going to happen.
Lots of people have a date for cs's. Then things happen naturally earlier than that date. And they end up giving birth vaginally.

I had a date for my cs. Then ds started coming. 2 weeks early. And it was at one of the biggest hospitals in London. And I still had to wait my turn, for my cs, behind the emergencies.

In those circumstances, women do end up giving birth vaginally, you know.

You better pray to god, that you are not one of those ladies.

You seem hell bent on getting on, but even if it is agreed, there are surefast guarantees.

goodluck bethoo on your birth by whatever means best for you. babydust

My Head of Obs, does not discuss births with ladies until 34 weeks. No cs will be agreed until 34 weeks. this is quite common.

thanks, i have not thought that far ahead yet! last time i wanted a water birth but could not due to having to be monitored for several reasons and had a fast v delivery.

thank you nikmac. we'll see what tomorrow brings

thefifthape - i agree that a picture if painted of long recoveries to dissuade women but just am pandering to it to some extent if i am honest. the recovery for a vb can be just as good or just as awful and am aware of that. i am a fit healthy person so my recovery should be ok and i have a very good support network it i am poorly.

Oblomov - yes i do know what it going to happen but am still worried as i do not know where or by who and need to know that it is all planned. the thought of going into labour terrifies the hell out of me so i am trying not to think of that. i would go into complete panic and i cannot stress that enough. thinking about it is enough. just hope that it all goes smoothly. thank you for your post

I wasn't even offered counselling, that's the state of the NHS in my "provincial" region.

If you are anti- c-section then I agree that ladies such as Ema76 and myself can come across as arrogant because we are prepared to stand up for what we have decided upon as our preferred personal choice having researched the risks/benefits and applied thme to our own particular circumstances. Underneath the surface we are no more arrogant than someone insisting on a homebirth - there are possible risks attached to that for mother and baby too, risks that are could be reduced/eliminated if the delivery took place in hospital but they are risks that the homebirth mother-to- be decides are acceptable if she is to try and avoid a hospital birth and the possible downside/risks associated with that.

I don't recall posters being that negative to MN'ers wanting a homebirth. It's generally supportive ...your choice, you have the right to request it etc. I won't labour the point in detail about the risks of homebirth as sadly I believe there is a MN'er who still experiences feelings of guilt over this matter.

Fiofio - i had an emergency hernia op and was absolutley fine. couldn't straighten up for a few days but otherthan that was great. that is major surgery too
my friend had a cs elective and was out of hospital in a few days and pushing the pram around in town by the end of the week. we are all different

I would rather have a section than a homebirth tbh!

but I worry about things going wrong (as they did with dd1) so a homebirth wouldn't have even crossed my mind

" I won't labour the point in detail about the risks of homebirth as sadly I believe there is a MN'er who still experiences feelings of guilt over this matter."

Ooh ouch, bit below the belt that one.

Well said sitdownpleasegeorge. We all have to make our own informed decisions (within reason)and assume them.

Ema, "trying not to think about it", is no good. It could happen. You have to atleast aknowledge this.
You have to understand that there is a possibility that you give birth vaginally.
No good sticking your head in the sand, on this one, I am afraid.

ema76 are you at least open to the possibilty of counselling helping you through this so that you can have a v birth?

c sections are a last option for a reason. helped my sister after hers with her second child she was in that much pain she couldnt even lift her own baby.

Ema76 - I do sympathise with you and your fears. I hope you get the outcome you want
But please try to stop thinking about your mum's experience. Things have moved on so much since then and both pre and aftercare are so much better.
My mum swears she was in labour with me for two and a half days and then had a VB, no stitches. Today they'd have recognised she was in v early labour only and advised her only to come in to hospital when she was more advanced.
You can't compare your labour to anyone else's - they're pretty unique to you (although they have similar experiences and the same outcome in the end ).

no. shesellsseashellsbytheseashore. I am not open to a vbirth and am going to stand up for myself on the decision i have made. i will do the counselling if i have to to show willing but it willnot change my mind, as i know myself and my own mind.
oblomov - no no no vbirth for me

But I hope you get your wish if it's truly what you want and no amount of counselling changes your mind

i am not naive fiofio - just stressing that we are all different and will recover at different rates from any op or vbirth. i will take it as it comes and am lucky to have supportive parents, partner and friends.

your mother and grand mother must have really drilled it into you how traumatic their childbirth was.

I was discharged within 2 days of my 3rd section and lifting my 5 year old (no blinking choice) the same week. I was driving within 3 weeks (again no choice). It didn't do me any good though, I would not recommend it and I only managed it because I dosed myself up with so much voltarol I rattled.

I felt fine after my first section, as I said the problems only became apparent on the operating table whilst having my second.