Community Midwifes not supporting my home birth

[BabiesEverywhere]

I feel like screaming they won't stop looking for problems. Up to now I have played ball and been to hospital for countless blood tests etc and I am sick of them.

I refused an referal for a growth scan (I don't care if I have a big baby) I was told I had to wait in today to speak to the team leader. My DH took the day off work and she never turned up !!!

Eventually got though to her at 4pm, she said she was going to ring tonight and rearrange for the weekend !!! Thanks a lot, after DH has wasted a holiday day for nothing and I have been stressed waiting for her to turn up

Had a brief chat on the phone and I explained that I am unconcerned by the size of my baby and if there was no medical reason I am happy to stand by not going for loads of growth scans.

But what if you were told you had a 11lb baby, I replied I would still stay at home and have a 'trial of labour' and hope that the scan was out in my favour (i.e. They can be out a pound or more)

She mentioned GD and GTT test, I explained no sugar in wee so was there a need for further testing. She suggested I had GD in last pregnancy and I explained I had done a GTT test and passed with flying colours, I just grow large babies (8 lbs 12 ozs last one)

So then she started going on about how she didn't want my baby to die, due to shoulder problems and that they don't carry the right kit to resuss babies. (WTF, I wonder what her boss would think of that statement)

That she didn't care if I hated her for transferring me. !?! (Bearing in mind this is 2 months before my due date) and on zero evidence, she has already decided that she intents on transferring me to hospital

I am so damm angry, upset and feel so let down

speak to the supervisor of Midwives

midwives do have recuss equipments for home bihrt

and a big baby alone is not indicative of shoulder dystocia

and the first method for resolving dystocia is the mccroberts maneouvre with suprapubic pressure, as recommend by RCOG .

which does not have to be done in hospital

she has an isshooooo with home birth it would seem

if you still get grief , speak to www.aims.org.uk they aer on notice to get the right recuss kits now, aren;t they ?

this is an issue your doula can help you with too.

My doula has been fantastic and is speaking to some people for me tomorrow.

AIMS lady is on holiday until Monday dinnertime (Home birth line)

Called local hospital and they claim they don't have an supervisor of Midwives (doula said that is crap and she will get the details for me) I have the details of the head of midwifey but she was not in today, so I'm going to ring back tomorrow.

if they don;t then i can give you the name of a serious big head honcho who can absolutely kick arse for you ...

I just don't think 8lbs 12 oz is that big - I had 8 8 and then 8 11 then dd3 - much gloom from our consultant about the size of the baby, shoulders stuck etc, why don't you have the GTT etc etc. Dd3 was under 8lbs! I felt like plonking on hid desk and saying 'ha'!

"she has an isshooooo with home birth it would seem" She is the head of the community home birth team

NorthernLurker, because I have no sugar in my wee, no symptoms no family history and tested clear last pregnancy.

Plus I am terrified of hospital and have currently undergone zillion of extra tests and I have had it up to here

well, she should not be in that role

seriously, if you get any trouble, email me, i have the name and contact of a Very Important Maternity services person.

very sorry you are having this grief, it is really just intolerable you have to deal with this stress.

BTW, my second was lighter than my first and had a smaller head by 3 cm and i measured bigger all the way through !!

lulumama thanks so much I'll let you know if I need big guns !!!

So far we have had so called issues (which I have addressed) :-

: My bad last 'birth'
: PPH Bleed will recur
: Blood Antibodies issues
: GTT Test/Size of Baby

when I refused the growth scan I was told I look pale and need another blood test for iron

okay.

my friend recently had home birth, she did have a PPH, but whizzed to hospital and resolved . she had PPH in first birth, so she was prepared.

two sachets of spatone, mixed with orange, no tea and coffe, and lots of iron rich foods shoulud help boost you

I have been where you are, unhelpful midwives and a very negative response to home birth.

First time was vbac at home, then vbac2 at home after 3rd degree tear. I had a normal home delievery the time after that and then they started about the risk of PPH it being #5. #5 was a shoulder dystocia at home, all fine. The midwife was great and made me change position, he came flying out

The next one was induction nightmare as i was pressured by the scare mongers about the baby being bigger and being shoulder dystocia again. He wasnt and the only reason he became a ventouse was due to the backward induction process.

This time i am STAYING AT HOME... I bet the midwife is gonna love me

Stand your ground, i have no idea why they are making such a fuss either. You are still a good few weeks of delievery!

The baby after the shoulder dystocia was only 2oz heavier too, even though they said he would be close to 10lb.

I think your treatment is appalling - we live in such a sue me society which has made medical professionals put covering their arses before the rights of women.

I am currently having my own little battle and I feel like I am winning the war - even though I KNOW I am right its still difficult to appose the men in the white coats - I mean little old me against all their years of experience! But you know its women like you and women like me that make it possible for other women to have the birth choices they want.

Other than esculate this to the head of midwifery - as others have suggested - I just wanted to say that your instincts are way more powerful than the opinions of these 'professionals', trust and beleive in yourself and I really hope that you get the birth choice you want.

Debs

Always hearing about people who get induced/ go into hospital because they're "having a big/small baby"... and they always seem to get it wrong. Why is she so reluctant? I thought community midwives enjoyed doing home births. Are you very far from a hospital?

I have no idea why but despite the problem they think I have, I am currently low risk and I am just as likely to have a normal home birth as anyone else out there. But because I had a crappy induced hospital nightmare last time, they want me to repeat the fucking experience.

Ask her "Do you not want me to have a home birth?", if not "Why not?". If you don't think the answer is valid, speak to her boss...

Wade, she is the boss. She has made it clear that she thinks I will have problems in a home birth (well, as soon as one of the endless tests finds one) and they don't want to give me a chance.

All I want is a supportive midwife to see how things go on the day and NOT invent problems. Seems that was too much to expect.

Midwives are scared of doing home births - no back up from colleagues; doctors telling them they're mad for risking their career and livelihood (if something goes wrong they can be struck off); knowing what can go wrong means that they will be having sleepless nights and want to call in sick when anything perceived as difficult comes in.

IMO they are not mean nasty women who want you to suffer - they want to take no risks at all.

If anything goes wrong they are slammed by management and society sees every baby's death as an avoidable error for which blame has to be handed out - mainly in their direction.

ps am not a midwife - SIL is!)

Good luck with the arguments - hope the home birth you want comes to fruition!

gagarin, If I had medical issues I would understand. The fact they are looking for non-existant problems, is why I am upset.

oh buggery bugger
I so hoped this would not be your post

they still don't seem to have received the message that you have chosen a hb and that is what they now have to plan for, having made sure you are fully informed of various risks etc. rather than v v unhelpful and incorrect talk of 'transferring you in'.

am so upset for you

any any chance you could get an independent midwife instead? (I know it is v expensive option)

I had my homebirth visit from my MW today and we went through a lot of points raised here

Shoulder dystocia is rare but when it does happen 50% of babies are not significantly above avergae weight, yes MWs are trained in how to deal with this.

Growth scans can be inaccurate

PPH - my MW said they carry drugs to combat this although a hospital transfer would still be necessary

I will be having a homebirth kit delivered including oxygen and resus equipment for the baby (along with the lovely gas and air).

I think she is shocking btw.

morocco, We are still saving for the student Doula, no way we can find thousands more for an independant midwife

sweetkitty, thanks for that information, reassuring that there are some midwifes out there who know there stuff

I know, I'm really sorry it is so hard to get what you want. can you get your doula to go with you to meet the head of midwifery to try and thrash out some of these issues? maybe better to meet them there if they are going to give you the run around

so on your behalf