How bad was the pain of labour/giving birth?

[HE96x]

Ftm due in just under 3 weeks so please give it to me as it is lol as I need to be prepared. How bad is the pain really? I do think I have a good pain threshold but by no means am I a superhuman when it comes to pain. I am aiming to go as natural as possible and just get through it on gas and air as i don't want stronger drugs if I can avoid it. I am so far quite complacent about the whole thing, I'm not particularly worried and keep telling myself yes it will be extremely painful but bearable, but.. is the pain bearable? Is it totally doable on just gas and air or am I being unrealistic? And also which was the worst part of the whole process for you, contractions or pushing/ring of fire?

Thanks in advance!

My mum told me it wasn't a walk in the park but doable and I found that to be true. I have osteoarthritis everywhere so am used to pain and cope pretty well.
I remember being in the labour ward and hearing someone screaming and swearing at the staff. I baulked a bit because I thought well I'm coping with this ok but I'm not sure I'm going to when the pain gets as bad as that woman in the next room.

I reiterated that to my midwife who said " honestly don't worry about it, you are much much nearer delivery than she is" . I don't know if that was true, but mentally that helped massively and gave me the strength to push on ( to coin a phrase)

I should say the worst pain I have ever had bar none was a double tooth abscess. If I could have cut my own head off I would have done.

My first was fine with no pain relief (as they didn't believe I was far enough on to go to labour ward until I was fully dilated). Painful yes but manageable. The worst bit was the 45 minute car journey. Second was very painful as I was induced on a drip but I managed with gas and air. The 'needing to push' my body just kind of started doing itself and that is how I knew. I'd go through it again and not be scared in the run up and I am someone that has always been scared of medical procedures.

I'll be honest: for me it was absolute agony. I'd done the whole pregnancy yoga thing: imagine yourself floating down a stream, yada yada. I was under the impression that labour was slow, but for me it was instant; I had a show and went straight to contractions every 4 minutes. I was terrified and panicking. I had planned a drug-free birth but ended up screaming for an epidural.

I had a drug-free water birth. It was too late to use a tens machine and I don't get on with gas and air. The whole thing took 5 1/4 hours from start to finish. On the plus side, DS was born underwater as planned, he had his eyes open looking around and didn't cry for several hours. I recovered really quickly, was able to breastfeed when he decided it was time (midwives said that boys are lazy!) did my hair and make up that day and went shopping on my own for an hour or so the next day.

Mine was fine. I wanted alllllllll the drugs. Got to hospital was 6cm and he was born 5 hours later. Never did get my drugs🤣I had gas and air but I didn't like the way it made me feel. So hardly used it. I did ask for something stronger but the midwife told me he was almost here and by the time I got it it would be over🙈 I did also complain to my husband that I just wanted to go home and the midwife wouldn't let me....yeh because I was just about to give birth🤣

Better than expected. It's quite uncomfortable and I definitely had a few panicked moments but nothing horrifically unbearable. Even immediately after the first I said its not something I'd want to do every day but not that bad.

2 natural births- gas and air just for pushing. 28hrs for the first, 14 for the second. Glad I'd didn't go for epidural as I liked the control of g&a. It stops as soon as you stop using it. I would've hated being restricted post birth. I was up and showering very quickly.

My pain wasn't like period pain or doing a poo. It was all pelvic, like someone was trying to pull my bones apart and shaky legs. Ring of fire thing is a bit pinchy but I was happy as I knew that meant it was nearly all over.

Honestly OP it was really bad for me. But, mine was back to back (although I'm sure is still very painful even if the baby if the right way around!)

I only had the option of gas and air due to the location that I gave birth. It really did nothing for me.

But, every birth is different so please try not to scare yourself too much. If you're in a hospital then at least you will have the option of stronger drugs and DON'T let them fob you off with paracetamol.

For me completely manageable when I was managing my breathing, I felt more out of control and in pain when I didn't. Weirdly I loved giving birth, I didn't have pain relief (only due to fast labours).

I'd really look to seek out good birth stories and don't think that this post will be at all helpful for you. I avoided negative stories (despite everyone wanting to tell me how awful it would be). And try to do a quick hypnobirthing course for 1) the breathing and 2) the birth education - knowing what's happening, and why, really will help.

Both mine were induced but my experiences were vastly different. My son's birth was long and drawn out, I was exhausted so asked for the epidural for a break and I was able to sleep until they stuck me with the drip. Needed fentanyl to stop the pain from that. His actual birth was pain free but the 24 hours leading up to it was awful - uncomfortable and painful to varying degrees.

My daughter's birth was short and intense. She was earthside an hour and 25 minutes after the induction was started. Of the two I definitely prefer my daughter's birth. It hurts but you really can breathe through it. I did the majority on my own and, because she was so speedy, I only had gas and air to help. Have a lot of water nearby because it dries you out something chronic!

Both mine were induced with the drip. I have quite a high pain tolerance. Worst pain I have ever felt is two ends of a broken bone rubbing against each other.

I felt everything in my back. DC2 was back to back (so to be expected), and we don't know with DC1. Contractions felt really bad period pains. Like a bad muscle cramp (which I guess they technically are), that comes and goes in a long pulse. I found contractions manageable for a while, but needed a bit more than gas+air once I hit 5cm. With my first I had diamorphine, second an epidural.

Main reason for the different choice of pain relief was time in labour up to that point. With my first, it was 6 hours. With my second, 10 hours. Second babies are supposed to come quicker and easier, and I found that that was not the case.

My first, all I wanted to do was lie on my side, and not be touched. When I couldn't face another contraction with just gas+air, as I wasn't keen on having an epidural I chose diamorphine instead. I was sound asleep between contractions, only waking as they neared their peak to suck on some gas+air, then drifting back off to sleep. So bizarre. Anywho, 5 hours later I was fully and was able to push. I had zero urge to push, so it was all conscious pushing. I also don't remember the ring of fire, though I do remember needing to shout at points, so maybe that was it. Pushing stage was only 20 minutes, so it was short lived at least.

Weirdly, despite the length of time, I preferred the second labour. I wanted to move around, and change position for most of it. Was very nice having counter pressure on my back too. However, as the day dragged on, and I got more and more tired, control eventually went out the window, and eventually I broke down crying that I couldn't do it, baby wasn't coming, and I wanted more pain relief. I chose the epidural as there was no guarantee how much longer labour was going to last. As it happens, not much longer, as my previous statement was truer than we realised. Baby was not coming. He was stuck, and his head was not in contact properly with my cervix, hence the slow dilation. After 13 hours of the drip, I was only 5cm, and so had a C-section. The epidural was extremely useful to top up in preparation for surgery.

All in all, yes it's painful

I've had 5 births:

1. Pain manageable; had a pethidine injection. 8.5hrs.
2. pain unbearable and no pain relief as it was 20 minutes from waters breaking to birth.
3. Embarrassingly easy birth: not much pain and no pain relief. 3 hrs. 4&5) Pain mostly manageable. No pain relief. 4 hrs.

I was lucky with all the above 😂

After having bouts of Gallstone pain labour pains were a breeze.

It hurt like a mo'fo, but I did it three times so you know, I got over it.

First was pretty bloody awful but manageable with pethidine

Second was fine and very short

I thought it was horrendous the first time around but after having my second I think it was largely the unfamiliarity of the pain that shocked and scared me and made it feel more painful than it was. I found the breathing exercises very helpful, good luck

I had a water birth at home and no pain relief. I plan on doing the same for my next birth. It was horrible but I felt safe so it was doable, I think if I was giving birth in hospital the anxiety of the unfamiliarity would’ve made it unbearable.

Take all the pain relief you need and make sure you feel comfortable and have birth partners that will advocate for you. It is unbelievably painful, there’s no words that can describe it, but it’s only temporary.

Ultimately there is going to be some pain involved - you’re getting a human out of your body! Experiences will vary wildly though.

I was induced which was ok up until they put me on the drip thing at which point I begged to be knocked out. Ended up with a ventouse birth and episiotomy which blissfully came with a spinal epidural. My healing was fine. The midwife did her home visit a couple of days later and I was sat cross legged ok the floor in jeans - she said ‘you’re doing well then!’

A couple of things that did shock me - my contractions seemed centred on my bum/tailbone. The midwife said I probably needed to poo which didn’t help anything because she added ‘it’s either a poo or the baby’ and I completely tensed up determined not to shit myself because she wouldn’t let me go to the toilet! Also (poo centred) is the first post birth crap - I didn’t experience pain but it was visually fascinating. Grey.

I remember people telling me contractions feel like period pain. When I got them, I remember chuckling to myself thinking yep, that's right!! But much more intense. Labour was ok, but I had to have forceps and a cut, and that's what was really sore afterwards.

I didn't think it was anything like period pains. I have found that the friends I have who went into labour blase and saying 'Oh I'll be fine' and were not prepared and hadn't been to clases etc (some had just watched a few things on Youtube) then they tend to come out the worst! I would say prepare as much as you can, do the breathing exercises, engage with professional advice about the different stages of labour so you are as prepared and informed as you possibly can be.
I mean lots of us have more than one. But it is pain like nothing else and at times you do feel like you're not going to be able to do it! I was shocked at how awful it was and lost the plot pretty early on with my first DC labour which was the worst thing; I wasn't as prepared as I should have been either. My second was born by elective C section thank God!

You can't compare with anyone else's because it's completely dependent on baby's position, duration of labor, complications etc.

I was lucky that mine were brilliant. Hypnobirth for the first, made easier by laboring in a bath with a doula, and baby was in optimal position and out in 4 hours.
Second was epidural birth as baby had some issues In utero and needed to be prepped in case I needed a section. Had the epidural sited at 11pm, slept the whole night and my OBGYN woke me up at 6am to tell me it was time to push. Baby arrived in 3 pushes.

Hand on heart would not change either and would do them again.

The scariest thing about labor is the feeling of lack of control. Unless you know you'll be listened to and you know you can request and receive your choice of pain relief quickly it can be incredibly daunting.

In my case I had an OBGYN who knew I wanted to try hypnobirth (and was supportive) and I knew I could request pain relief at any point and would get it. That helped me to feel far more confident and in control of my own labors.

There is a huge difference between pain and suffering. I knew the minute mine went from one to the other I would request meds but I was lucky that I never got to that point because of the nature of my labor.

I've had two natural births and an elective c section. As much as I preferred the c section in one way, giving birth was an amazing experience. Crowning was the worst part. Once that's out the way the rest was much more manageable. Only complication I had was my births were quite fast, tore badly with my first and needed a lot of stitches. However I had the drip, I do believe that increases the pain and speed of labour. It wasn't as bad as it sounds. I was more embarrassed than anything which sounds ridiculous I know.
With my second I injured my back and have a fair bit of trouble to this day with back pain. I already had a bit of back trouble to begin with though so that didn't help. I consider my births to have gone very well all things considered. I feel for women who have long labours it must be exhausting.

I'm pregnant again and having my tubes tied all going well, otherwise I'd have opted for a natural birth again.

I think for me it wasn't so much the pain as feeling trapped inside my own body and not really getting a break from the pain. It was a sense of claustrophobia.

I ended up with an EMCS anyway so I think you just can't predict how this are going to go and need to try and keep an open mind because the baby isn't reading your birth plan!

I was induced and the pain was worse than I ever imagined. The contractions were the worst bit and worse than the episiotomy. I can’t believe some people say it’s like period pain.

But I was back on my feet an hour or so after the birth, out walking with baby 48 hours later and riding my bike again as soon as 6 week check had been done.

So birth itself was worse than expected in my case but recovery was easy and quick.

Might be relevant that I was very fit when I got pregnant, eg could easily cycle 100 miles a week.

For me it was the worst pain I ever experienced. To the extent I categorically refuse to have another baby. And I did have an epidural.

Everyone is different.

It differed for me in each birth. You may be fine. Stressing yourself will make you tense and won't help.A baby coming easily is not at all uncommon.

im probably not the best person to ask.

first it hurt and I got an epidural

second I got to 9cm with just gas and air. If you had offered me a gun I would definitely have killed myself that continue. But baby was back to back and it was excruciating