Vaginal Birth or Elective Section?

[VictorianSqualor]

What would you reccommend a first time mother and why??

MrsR - I haven't really looked into the other options.

I did talk to my GP about the difficulty I was having finding ante natal classes and getting appts to see my mid wife and it was she who suggested going private.

I did look at quite a few private hospitals, but I'd left it quite late (didn't decide to go private until a couple of weeks ago) and was told that consultant led care was the best option for me.

I had a lovely discussion with my consultant and he suggested either an inducement or CS.

I did look into Doulas (Hertsnessex on MN was very kind) but I still can't see how that solves the problem of me being on my own when I go into labour and I can't be sure the mid wife will be there?

How much can a doula actually do for you though? I can understand that if you're in a busy unit and you are left alone for long periods then a doula is great. Or if the MWs aren't really into active labour and the doula can support you to move around and encourage you etc.

I was in a MW-led birthing unit and had constant one-on-one care with MWs who were passionate about natural childbirth, so I don't really know how that would have been different.

But once things have started to go wrong, is a doula really going to say to a consultant "no, she doesn't want that"? And is a consultant going to pay the slightest bit of notice?

i haven't read the rest of the thread.

I would def advise VB if possible. I've had both CS and VB - CS for DS1, who was breech, and VB for DS2. The recovery was much quicker with VB, I could walk about the same day, rather than only managing 100 yards to the post office after a week. Unless there's a medical reason to have a section, I'd go for VB every time.

Well, I had two VBs - one without pain relief because I got there too late for epidural or the jab and G&A gave me the boak and made me feel like I was suffocating. I found nothing beautiful about it and pushing out my DD2s head felt like I was being disembowelled. And despite 'support', at the end of the day it was my body going through that alone.

I felt trapped by the pain. I truly wanted to die rather than take anymore of that and felt helpless and out of control.

There are other women who feel the same way and so I don't see why their choice to have a different birth from you find ideal is any less valid.

There's no way I'd consider a homebirth out here. If anything went wrong, you're so far away from a consultant, not to mention a loch crossing, there's a good chance you or your child could die or be seriously injured.

I'm considering going abroad so I can have an epidural asap because I see nothing noble, beautiful or amazing about the pain of childbirth myself.

I want an epidural on demand, G&A does FA for me. It's not even a pain reliever, it just alters your perception of it - thta goes to figure why it's used here, it's probably cheap as chips, too, and the only way to get that is to go abroad.

By MrsTittleMouse on Thu 06-Mar-08 15:00:0

But once things have started to go wrong, is a doula really going to say to a consultant "no, she doesn't want that"? And is a consultant going to pay the slightest bit of notice?

a doula is not there to argue with or direct the clinical aspect of the birth. she will be able to advocate for the mother she is with, it things go wrong, dhe doula is there to support the mother and support her if things get scary, not to tell a consultant his job.

but research does show that having one to one continous care in labour does reduce chances of c.s or instrumental delivery. klaus and kennel did a lot of reasarch on this.

expat , i thought your labours were quite quick? have you considered opiate pain relief?

My first was 24 hours long and ended in forceps delivery, as she was face up and hand up cupping her head above the ear.

The second one was quicker, but I didn't get to hospital until it was too late for relief.

I still did NOT relish the drug free experience.

I found it terribly, horribly painful.

No, I wouldn't consider opiate pain relief.

I don't do well with opiates - I've had lots because of other procedures.

I prefer the epidural.

Of course, the one they gave me when I was in agony with DD1 they didn't top up very well until teh S. African anaesthetist came in and yelled at them for leaving me in such pain - and with no hydration in my canula so I'd also gone all that time without liquids.

I thank God for him because I can imagine how horrible it would have been to have forceps delivery without it being topped up to the max.

My personal experience on the whole is that they under pain relieve here woefully, and I don't like it at all.

what is the policy on epidural where you plan to give birth? is there one aneasthatist on call or more?

how would the logistics work of going abroad?

Going abroad, well, I'd stay at my sister's house and see her OB.

There is NO way I would stay in this trust to give birth. None whatsoever, I have no trust in that lot of charlatans at all.

So my alternative is to go and stay with SIL and give birth in Edinburgh again at ERI.

Where you may be waiting a very long time indeed for an epidural, as I did with DD1 - waited nearly 3 hours as I reached 4cm in the middle of the night.

But I know that if I went with my sister's OB and hospital, I could have one as soon as I asked, no matter what dilation.

That idea I find incredibly relieving and relaxing, knowing I won't suffer for long.

For me, the pain makes me very, very anxious and tense and nothing will alter that perception or state of mind in me.

I don't like it.

As it is, I've not informed my surgery of my pregnancy and doubt I will. I phoned them and the GP has opted out of providing medical care, so you're stuck with these battleaxe midwives.

No, thanks.

I'd just as soon see a jakey in a pub than see one of them.

We can't afford to move just now.

Someone said earlier that a CS should only be given in cases where there is a medical need.

I totally agree, but when does an emotional need become medical?

IMO, my attempt at a VBA2C is a medical necessity because of the trauma, the PND and the absolutely disabling fear I have of more surgery.

Medical includes mental health and if that means CS then so be it, I do not personally agree with people having CS's because they fear for their sex life or want to fit it in on a weekend etc, but that's not my decision. I can only hope that these people are given every fact needed and make their decisions based on those rather than vanity or ease of schedule.

Lulumama -
I'm not trying to be arguementative, I hope it doesn't come across that way. I am genuinely wondering whether to have a doula this time round, and whether it would have made a difference last time. Of course, I still have strong feelings about my last delivery, because I had such bad luck, and then was treated badly, so I probably "sound" more grumpy than I intend, sorry.
If you already have good MW (which I know is not something to rely on!), does the doula do anything different? What can a doula do once things have gone wrong (given that the chances of things going wrong are much lower with good MW or doula support)?

that sounds like a good plan, expat.

MrsTM , i did not thikn you were being argumentative at all .

what do you mean by things going wrong? it covers such a large scope.....

the doula will be there to support you and your Dh, to comfort and help you emotionally if thing go wrong, to be a loving pair of hands, and to do whatever is needed at the time.

good support pre and during labour is veyr helpful. a doula can be your advocate if your birth preferences are being ignored for no good reason.

'Letting a woman choose major surgery over a natural birth when they have experienced neither is ridiculous '

So is treating her like she doesn't have enough of a brain to make a decision like that about her own body.

I'm not going to bother with the antenatal 'care' on offer here in this trust.

The emotional stress I'll get from the attitude they have here will send me right back down in a downward spiral mentally.

And I see 100% where you're coming from, ruty.

MrsT, I would rec a 'voice' for you that isn't yourself or your partner, whether it be a doula or not is a decision you must make.

I have roped in my MiL because not only does she work at the hospital and know exactly how HCP's can overlook the patients wants and needs and won't stand by and allow it to happen, she is calm and collected enough to be able to support me and DP (who will probably be a wreck!) and knows that her 'job' as such is to check that my birth preferences are being followed, and to ask me what I want if anyone tries to 'take over'.

I don't think I'd feel happy without someone there to be that 'voice' and I imagine a doula is the same but with experience and knowledge.

Right, I'm confused here. Expat, are you pregnant?

Yes, I'm pregnant, eleusis.

Still trying to decide where to give birth.

Luckily there's a British Consulate in my hometown so it won't be hard to get teh baby his/her UK passport to come back afterwards.

But I really and truly do NOT want to go the drug-free route this time.

Was it Flora again?

'Letting a woman choose major surgery over a natural birth when they have experienced neither is ridiculous '
How is it?

As I have said time and time again, I think that as many births as possible should be VB's, I don't believe in unnecessary surgery, but neither do I believe anyone else has a right to tell me what to do with my body or to overlook my emotional needs whether it be regarding birth or what colour I choose to dye my hair.
It's my choice.

The main reason I would suggest any woman with a fear of VB that hasn't had either should go for counselling of some description is that it may be easily worked through, and surely having either option available without any added 'emotional issues' is the best situation for a pregnant mother.

Also with a first baby, it can restrict your choices later on if you decide to have another pregnancy, and each CS you have puts more risk on the next pregnancy, which is something that would probably seem insignificant against a VB fear during a first pregnancy, but may become apparent in later pregnancies.

for you (assuming you are happy about it this time)

, no, not this time, eleusis. We've gone vanilla in our old age .