Why is everyone so anti elective c-section?

[Gangle]

I'm only 7 weeks pregnant but am sure I want an elective c-section. I've read extensively around the subject and think I'm well informed on the pros and cons of elective c-section v VBAC but it seems there is so much stigma attached to elective c-sections and that people will do/say anything to attempt to dissuade you from having one. Just wondering why there isn't more respect for your wishes about how you want to give birth.

I have tried that for the past four weeks nab, he's completely wedged in there, feet tucked up pushing against my tummy! Maybe it's having a stinking cold and feeling so awful but I just feel I can't face anything uncomfortable or stressful right now. Maybe that's colouring my feelings about ecv, that and the fact the hospital have given me no time to decide and no one to talk to about it

MrsMar - I was given an hour to decide whether to have an elective CS that day because of some complications which I'm too tired to explain right now but decided to have it because it was the safest option for me and for my baby. I don't regret it because it was the right decision but I'd rather not have had one. Having said that, it was as good as a cs could be.

I do know different hospitals have different policies on breech vbs - do a search on here as I think there's been quite a few threads about it and on ECV too.

Good luck with whatever you choose

MrsMar, I totally agree with Martianbishop about her experiences with cs.

It is not necessarily the failure or horrendous recovery that it can be painted out to be. In fact, I was pretty much 90% within a week. And doing all the things I was doing before (and caring for a toddler) at 2 weeks. Just take it easy and book in some support (you can because it is elective) over the initial period.

"oozing mass of pus" never applied to me, and I have had 2, including one super-crash emergency cs under GA. I don't think my wound oozed even once. I know, because I would freak too! Come to think of it, oozing "down there" would freak me out even more!

I was so pro-natural birth, NCT, active birth and all that. I did not even address myself to cs, convinced it would never happen to me and only to the very very unlucky. Guess what, I was induced and it ended in a crash cs. For that, I felt like I was cheated. The second one, with the hindsight of my brilliant recovery, I opted for an elective.

It is true the NHS does not give the full picture, of cs OR induction (but that is a different story). Don't let anyone scare you. Every birth experience can be good or bad, it is not necessarily linked to whether you have a cs or vb.

MrsMar, I'm so sorry this thread has scared you. I have only posted on it once and got so angry about some of the posts thought I'd better not wade into the fray! (probably should have stopped reading to...).

I had a cs at 34 weeks that was classed as emergency, although I had no labour so physically it was probably more like an elective. Emotionally it felt very much like an emergency, despite having been in hospital for 3 weeks with pre-eclampsia I had not prepared myself in any way for my baby to be born early and had definitely had not considered cs at all. You are in the best position to go into this, able to think it through clearly, prepare yourself and have your support crew on standby . The op itself was no problem at all, very calm, the staff were all very kind and I had excellent post-natal care. I was in quite a lot of pain afterwards, but it wasn't unbearable and it was only bad when I was trying to do too much. I guess no method of childbirth is pain free! There was no oozing at all . Oh and despite ds going straight to SCBU we had no bonding issues and he is still bf at 12 months.

Childbirth is a lottery - you don't know what you're going to get until you're actually doing it, whichever method you go for. The best any of us can do is try to make an informed decision on the best thing to do for our own situation. NOTHING connected to the entrance your baby makes to the world will make you any less of a woman or mother. Martianbishop talks a lot of sense!

Aw bless you guys thanks for the reassurance! I've had a chat with the midwife this morning and judging by the size of the baby at 37 weeks (7lbs) she wasn't convinced we'd successfully turn him so to avoid stress and worry we're booking me in for an elective cs. She reassured me the experience of an elective cs is very different and the risk factors for the baby are slightly reduced than for an emergency, esp as it will be done after 39 weeks, which gives the baby pretty much as much time as possible to finish growing.

Gangle, if its the indignity and the writhing around screaming thats bothering you, opt for an epidural.

If you really feel a CS is the only way for you, then do that, but please make sure you've weighed up all the pros and cons before opting for what is major surgery.

Personally, i'm happier with my vaginal birth and being back on my feet within a couple of days, than the CS experience and recovery my friend had to deal with.

My experience was almost identical to Martianbishops in terms of post op. Straightforward recovery, neither dc had problem feeding (had two sections) ds was a little jaundiced but that is very common. My 2nd section (elective not emergency) was a very positive happy experience and my first was certainly alot better than alot of my friend's so called 'natural' births.
I think it is too early for you to make any decisions and you need to talk things through with a sympathetic midwife. I certainly intended to try the 'natural' route but it was not to be. I have a low pain threshold though and always intended to have an epidural.
These horror stories that people tell you are undoubtedly true but annoy me because if you had titled your post 'I'm scared of giving birth'- whether that's your reason or not - I'm sure they wouldn't have come on to scare the cr*p out of you .

Mrs Mar, I really felt for you reading your post and just wanted to say: good luck, and don't be scared by some of the posts on here!

I had a very similar experience to LiegeandLief, an emergency cs for first baby (although mine really was an emergency) and an elective for second. I too was amazed by how the cs was nothing like as bad as the scare stories I'd been told beforehand. Maybe I was just lucky, but some of the comments on this thread (eg, feeling numb on stomach forever afterwards, shaking uncontrollably, oozing pus) just didn't happen to me at all.

The best birth you can have is a quick, straightforward vaginal birth with no drugs. But that's not possible for a lot of women for all sorts of different reasons, so the best you can do is to weigh up the odds for your personal circumstances of the different birth options.

Truth is, there are horror stories for both natural births and for C sections. Personally I've had two emergency c sections (first one was 'real' emergency i.e. foetal distress, second I tried a VBAC but ended up with another c section).

I have to say that I felt incredibly happy after both births. I just spent hours looking at my boys, kissing them and feeding them and looking at them sleep. I understand that women who have had vaginal birth feel an amazing sense of pride, but I don't feel that anything of the increadible loving feeling is any different if you have a section. I don't feel that I have failed in any way and whatever other people say, I think that my birth experices are worth every bit as much as someone who gave birth vaginally. There.

Also, you know, just looking down this thread there are a few references to stomach muscles being 'cut through' and never recovering, and that's really not true. The muscle is lifted out of the way. A full recovery is perfectly possible - of course different bodies heal in different ways, but it's natural to find all these processes, natural birth and sections, scary, so I thought I'd just mention that - stomach muscles remain uncut.

Gangle, Mrs. Mar:

Many of the attitudes expressed here are quite judgemental, extreme and narrowminded. In the end, it is your body and your choice. It is sad and dissapointing how cruel women can be to each other, when we should actually be supportive. Ignore the extreme scare stories, and do your own unbiased research.

FWIW, I'm a medic and my father is an OB/GYN and I had always planned an elective c-section prior to getting pregnant with DS (oh boo hiss me, terrible awful person, should never be a mum, etc). I had my reasons (which I don't need to divulge to anyone), and more than knew any risks/consequences. In an otherwise healthy person, it is always safer to have an elective c-section than labouring for hours, then having an emergency cs.

I ended up having precipitous labour (1 hour), DS was half born in a cab with me waddling into the closest A&E with his head already delivered. The nursing and midwifery staff treated me with sarcasm (was supposed to deliver privately, but didn't make it to the hospital and thus ended up in an NHS A&E, so they were giving me flack about that) and indifference. The scheduled elective cs led to even more uncalled for remarks.

In the end, do what you are comfortable with, and shrug off the aside comments. I do agree that if you plan on having an elective cs which is not medically necessary, that you should go privately (will get more support there anyways).

In terms of results, a third of people I know have made the same choice I did (but actually did have the CS), and are very happy with their choices. Their kids are all fine, never had antenatal problems, and did not expreience the horror story recoveries which some people have told. They all have close relationships with their kids (no bonding issues), and you wouldn't be able to differentiate their relationships/post-natal expereinces from a person who had a vd.

In the end, people should have the birth expereinces they want, and we shouldn't judge them for their choices.

Hey Morning glory and Mrs Mar
I wanted to say thanks to you both for the comments you have added.
This is the first time I have written on this thread but I too am feeling a little upset by some of the scare stories and negative comments previously made.
I too have a breech baby currently and are going through dilemmas surrounding the C section... I have medical knowledge too and as yu can appreciate sometimes that is a hinderance rather than a help.
At the end of the day- all you can hope for is a healthy and happy baby and mum and it's an individual choice. If I had my way of course I would hope for a nice and natural delivery but sometimes that choice is taken out of your hands.

Macneil. Can you tell me what has happened to mine then?

I am much lighter than I was before I was pregnant, but ever since c section, have a horrible fat stomach. I have done loads of exercises, even working with a personal trainer, but it has made no difference. I struggle to fasten pre-preg trousers up, but thy are fairly biggish on me elsewhere. In fact I struggle to get trousers to fit at all

Well, sadly they do stretch during pregnancy, and stretched muscles sometimes never return to their pre-stretched size. In second pregnancies, too, the muscles are often stretched further. It's not unusual for body shape to change with any pregnancy - my friend who had a natural birth is struggling more than me to get a flat stomach again, although she has a glorious pert arse and mine is the arse of a plump 70 year old. From the sound of it, I would imagine that you actually look dynamite hot these days and the stomach is just the least controllable part for you - if you look at Jennifer Garner, people are constantly asking if she's pregnant again because she has a MINISCULE bump. She gave birth naturally and works out like a Hollywood star and her body is absolutely killer, but she doesn't have the Hollywood concave stomach, so people talk crap. I think it's starting to upset her because so many people talk about it.

From July 2006! and ever since, I think....

www.celebrity-babies.com/2006/07/jennifer_garner.html

I have a flatter stomach than pre-pregnancy

but oh, those damn love handles round the back ..............any ideas?

Don't ask a midwife for advice re your lovehandles highander, because you won't believe a word they say!

I found your post re midwives 'honesty' very offensive.

but hum ho, I would

I am not anti - elective cs, however given the opportunity to have a go at a normal birth, I would jump at it.

My first baby turned himself at 35 weeks to become breach and fortunately for me the consultant had the forethought to give me a pelvic x - ray, to find I have a minut pelvis, and there would be no chance on this earth I would be able to give birth naturally.

Now, against all advice, and 5 caeseareans later, I would love to have another baby, however, as a doctor once told me you can only blow up a balloon so many times before it pops. So if you have the chance of a normal birth and would like a large family, go for the normal birth.

On the stomach side of this, I have always made myself stand up straight as soon after as possible, and although it hurts like hell, pull your stomach in, it trains the muscles quickly whilst everything else is returning to normal (it does work, 5 kids, size 8, flat stomach), and take pride in your personal knowledge that at least you wont have a vag like a wellie. (lol)