Do hospitals routinely ask the father to leave shortly after birth?

[nangnangnang]

I gave birth to DS at 3.30 in the morning. At 4.30 the three of us made our way back to the maternity ward and, shortly after, my DP was asked to leave (in spite of posters everywhere saying partners had unfettered visiting rights). There was one other woman in the ward but she was awake and texting. Is this normal? Neither of us thought to question it at the time which I now regret.

I think if you stay on the ward a couple of nights I can see the rule but straight after birth I do think time should be allowed for new parents to get to know their little one. Especially as this is a time whne the daddy's can help the exhausted mummy.

When i had my first two they were both sections so the midwives could mete out their nastiness towards me during the night.

When I had dc3 he was born at 4am and we left together 12 hours later.

When I had dc4 she was born at 8pm and we left 3 hours later, midwife suggested going to postnatal ward but once I had convinced them I was going nowhere without dh they backed down and discharged me and dc4.

I will be advising my dcs to go for homebirths every time and avoid the horrors of the postnatal wards

DS was asked to leave when I gave birth to DS2 and DS3 in the early hours. I remember being quite shocked with DS2 but was expecting it with DS3. I sort of understand the logic, but it was very hard at the time even though I had had a straight forward labour.

did anyone who had a 'normal' delivery not request to go home straight from delivery suite if staying as a family unit is so important to you and that distressing to eb seperated? its not meant as a dig but i just wondered as so many on this thread feel they had sub satnadard care, perhaps would have been better off insiting go home form delivery suite?

they were fairly flexible with dh when i ahd my 3 but they were all born in the morning, ds1 at 5.30 a.m and dh came up to ward for an hour or so but went home as as as wella s me being awake for 72 hours so had he and was knackered. but ds2 and dd were section for breech so bonr at 9.45 a.m and dh stayed for the rest of the day going home at about 7p.m to allow me to sleep and to get soem sleep himself.

fwiw private rooms are usualyl free as people don't want to pay for them. and some are kept free for patients requiring isolation, sucha s infectious conditions. or women whos babies are on scbu so don't want to be in a ward with other well babies crying. in the hospital i work private rooms fathers/partners are still not allowed to stay as it is for the privacy of all women. delivery suite is usally a bit more flexible especially when not busy or if you are going straight home form d/s.

sorry to hear so many of you had unpleasant experiences.

our hospital has visiting hours on the antenatal ward of 1400-1630 & 1800-2000 - and that includes fathers!!

That said I ended up with an emC/S last time, eventually got onto the ward at about 5pm, DH left at about 7pm as I was knackered (no sleep previous 2 nights) & wanted to sleep. However after a C/S our hospital doesn't allow you to be in a private room the first night, you have to be in the open bay next to the nurses station. I was the only one in there when DH left.

Just after DH had gone another lady was brought up - they were fairly quite, but still enough noise to stop me sleeping - her DH left about 2230.

At 2300 I was woken by another lady arriving with DH & sister (I'm assuming, too young for mum) - who weren't at all quite - they eventually got told to leave by m/w at about 0100.

At 0200 woken again by another lady with DH & mother - again not in the slightest bit quite taking flash photos too.

m/w found me in tears at 0330ish as I was just so desperate for sleep & then asked them to leave, boy did they make a fuss about it. eventually left about 45mins later.

So I finally got some sleep, only to be woken at 0630 for breakfast

I wish they would keep fathers etc out of the shared ward areas in the night, it's only fair to those who want/need to rest. They could perhaps have a separate area where if you have delivered in the middle of the night fathers can stay as long as they want, but everyone in there is in the samew boat so no one minds? (I can understand them tipping you out of delivery if they need the bed)

Needless to say I asked for a single room (which I paid for) as soon as possible the next day. Still noisy but no where near as bad as the shared ward. Went home as soon as they'd let me on day 3 & finally got a good nights sleep