Has anyone had a labour that wasn't horrific?

[Leleophants]

There are so many horror stories and I feel like some women like to scare others who've yet to go through it. You only hear about how bad it is.

Anyone think it WASN'T as bad as they thought? Or found really good ways to cope?

Helpful advice is better than fear!

“Mine was fine. I do realise I'm lucky to have had a positive experience.”

No you weren’t. It’s unlucky to have a negative one. People have been made to feel guilty for sharing positive experiences, so they don’t.

I read lots of positive birth stories to try to help my anxiety before my first birth last year. In the end I had a very traumatic experience which in general I avoid telling other women about as I don't want to scare or upset them, but this in turn means it's hard to process the feelings I now have around it and I don't think women should ever be pressured to keep it to themselves if they've gone through birth trauma. At the end of the day labour is something you can't predict or control. You may have a traumatic labour or it may be just fine. Either way it's no reflection on you. I find myself reading the positive comments on this thread and feeling shit about myself to be honest, but deep down I know I was just very unlucky with the care I received on the day and thankfully my baby and I survived.

Nope. Really awful here.

Mine was fine. On my first, I had a bit of bleeding (30+3) so went to the hospital. This was about half 6 in the evening. Strapped to a monitor for hours and my waters broke about half 1 in the morning and he was born at 6am. Natural birth with gas and air. No tears etc.
Second, my waters broke in the middle of the night around 3am (33 weeks) had a bath and went to the hospital and he was born at around half 5 the next afternoon. Same as before. Natural birth with gas and air and no tears or anything.
My problem was keeping them in for long enough!

Rumpole, you are being very unreasonable to go onto a thread asking specifically for non-horrific birthing stories and say you had a really awful experience.

Both of mine were far from horrific, they're experiences I think back on very fondly. In fact I would happily give birth again and feel a little sad that I won't be doing so!

I should add - hypnobirthing / breathing relaxation exercises were amazing for me. As was use of a TENS machine for pain relief (both births) and water (second birth).

My first was drip induction, which I was scared about, but actually it was very bearable and the TENS saw me through.

Me, thankfully. First, had some intervention but was totally fine. Second was near perfect. Stitches both times. Good treatment by midwives and doctors. Had no particular expectations prior to either birth.

Yup. Two beautifully straightforward births here. They called me the silent labourer the second time as I was dilating quickly but still on the phone for bloody work! It's an experience for sure like no other but it was magic.

I use hypnobirthing techniques now for any kind of pain like needles taking blood etc. It's the gift that keeps on giving!

Three babies, no problems. The first was at home and the other two in a midwife led unit. 7 hours, 5 hours, 2 hours respectively. Had a shot of pethidine with my middle child because he was 9lb 4 and decided to come out with his arm near his head but no complications.

I had a very easy delivery with my first (and only) child. I woke with contractions at 5.30am, my waters went at @7am, arrived in hospital at 8.30am, had an epidural @11am which worked exactly as I wanted it to. I could still feel and move my legs, but was almost entirely pain free. Within 3 hours of the epidural at 2.15pm I delivered my 8lb 2oz son with a couple of pushes and without any tears or an episiotomy. I also breastfed without any difficulties for 6 months when my son weaned himself over a week or so! He is now 30! 😊

Very good point Bertrand

Annabel I'm really sorry that you didn't have such a positive experience. Coming onto a thread that asks for positive experiences is going to hurt though but not one of us are sharing our experiences to hurt or offend those who haven't.

Giving birth is such a monumental thing for a woman to do and we should all be able to share our stories. That said, those women who've experienced traumatic births need to be able to also talk freely and safely to help them come to terms with this trauma. It's absolutely your right to off-load so maybe start a thread?

From one woman to another, I'm so sorry you've had such trauma and wish you positivity and strength. Hopefully with time, you can heal

My elective c section was fine with my second.

I had 3 quick calm drama free births - I was very fortunate - people told me before I had my first they felt like there were going to die - I never felt like that ! The only bit I can truly say wasn’t great was the crowning ring of fire - but once you get to that stage it’s goinf to be over very quickly

Both my labours were quick, in water, no pain relief other than the pool. It was the part of the process I found easy, empowering and straightforward. There was no screaming and shouting, I went really insular and just let me body get on with it as it seemed to know what to do.

One thing that helped my mental state was that I read everything I could about things that go wrong in delivery. I educated myself so if things hadn't gone to plan I would understand more about what was happening

I will say that of my 5 closest parent friends I'm the only one who needed no medical intervention of any kind. Ranging from induction up to EMCS and everything in between. I find stories of it being simple rarer. It makes me feel very fortunate

OP I do totally understand your point about not wanting to hear horror stories but I do also agree with other posters who say that the reason women who’ve had bad experiences talk about them is because it can be completely life-changing trauma and there is virtually no support available for them - if anything they’re silenced, I think.

No way would a man be expected to get up after, for example, having someone cut through his genitals with scissors, or cut open his abdomen in an emergency, and just get on with looking after a newborn without ever talking about the experience again for fear of ‘scaring others’. No way.

And I say this as a pregnant first timer myself. I don’t like hearing traumatic birth stories but I just think it’s really important that women who suffer birth trauma aren’t silenced.

Me I'd happily do labour again. Wouldn't do pregnancy though, that was shit

Yes, Ive been very lucky. Both my labours 3 hours long and complication free so no need for pain relief. I feel as though this sped things up for me as I knew how to react to my contractions. Don't worry too much, everything will be fine x

I had a tough labour that ended in forceps. First labours are often tough. However it wasn’t awful. I look back on it fondly. I think it’s important not to go on with set expectations. Hypnobirthing can help but if they start needing to get the drip out or forceps etc you’re prob going to need something stronger!
I think all women who give birth, however, are amazing. Having intervention does not necessarily mean your labour was horrific. It was the happiest day of my life

Mine was fairly straightforward (although they wanted to transfer me to Bristol - I'm in Edinburgh!!) but the consultant said nope, these twins will be here within 8 hrs. They were born within 8 hrs although 6 weeks early so tiny and whisked away. 12 yrs later they make me so proud every day!

I loved my births with dc1 and dc3. Births with dc2, dc4 and dc5 were awful though.

My waters went at around 4.30am and I gave birth at 0940. It was very straightforward thankfully

I actually loved labour. I got to 6cm pretty easily with no pain relief. Then I had some gas and air upto 8cm then again I had no pain relief. I was actively pushing for around 2 hours. I did tear a little but nothing major.

I'd happily do it all over again, and yes this was my first!