Things they're not telling you about vaginal birth..

[Viola82]

Just wondering what expecting mother should know about the natural birth and AFTER it please?
There is so much info about c-section and recovery after, but what about recovery after the natural birth? Even the vanilla standard one with no complications ect?
please don't sugercoat, write it as it is

Feeling like you've been hit by a train! Second PP's suggestion of pouring water while you pee.

I found my third with stitches hurt a lot less after than my first 2 without stitches, and only my first hurt a lot to wee or sit down after so it can vary a lot birth to birth.

Few days/weeks later your utereus contracts back into position. My god i used to dread breast feeding as it was in sync with latching on. You feel it literally being sucked back into place.

I only needed one stich each vb so no stinging, no first poo issues. I gave birth stood up so my bleeding stopped within a couple of days and was like a normal period for me (although i do have heavy periods).
SPD continuing for two yrs after the birth was my 'headline' issue, all be it not birth related.

Don't be fooled that your episiotomy doesn't hurt. Wasn't til the day after we got home, and I was swollen and bruised that I realised it fucking hurt. I thought people were just being mard.

If you are stitched, don't be alarmed if you think your scarline has come apart. I had a continual thread of stitches rather than individual ones. part had dissolved making me think the wound had burst open. It hadn't and was healing nicely from inside out which is best to avoid infection.

A sitz bath with a cap of lavender oil and a cap of milk in was sheer bliss.

Oh and the smell after birth and a few days after. I had this weird, fruity smell eminating from my nethers.

Oh and if you need to pee, pour warm water down your belly whilst peeing - it helps.

Also, I felt "fine" when I was first home. Listen to your body. I was passing huge clots which was apparently my body telling me to slow down according to my midwife (if anyone can explain that that would be helpful as I've never understood this)

Fattymcfaterson Yep, exactly what I did too! Worked a treat.

I didn't have many of these problems. I remember the first poo being scary, but it was OK. I bled a lot - but then you do with a section too, that's not a vaginal birth thing.

The sensation of walking was weird, and I did feel like my stitches would split, but they didn't. It was sore for a week or so, but no worse than that - I could always sit.

I think the thing to take away from this is that while there are a lot of things that might happen, every birth, and every recovery is different. There's no way of knowing what your experience will be.

If you have a sweep or examination before labour they will make a totally OTT show about getting your consent first. When you're actually in labour it starts off similar but goes downhill to them just informing you before doing stuff to you and then at the end they might not even bother with that.

thank you so much for all answers! great idea with the jar of water and joga poses! poo more scary :(
I've also ready about breastfeeding and uterus, hope it passes away at some point..

and.. what about... sex? anything changes for us ladies? I've read that there might be more.. room, hence less pleasurable for your partner but what about the female experience?

You can't hold a wee in for long in the days immediately after. Don't stray too far from a toilet.

The first poo is scary.
No stitches doesn't mean no grazes. I tore slightly in two places giving birth to dd1, but not enough to warrant stitching. Was bloody sore afterwards though.

Buy a dark coloured (because of blood) new soft towel. The last thing you want when you are feeling tender down below is a. Scratchy white towel. Also just dab yourself dry, do not rub.

Also one thing I was not prepared for... My first proper period after birth (breastfeeding stopped me having one for months) was the HEAVIEST I have ever had.

I managed to have a wee and poo no problem at all after having both of mine. I was lucky though and didn’t tear with my first and had an emergency csection with my second. Couldn’t believe it, after years of trouble with IBS and the one time I expected to have problems and nope it was fine!

that if they cut you to get baby out that it stings and the stitches will just fall out a few days later, (for peeing and pooing get a water bottle of water to clean area afterwards as it hurts down there alot after) like others the first poo is very sore and terrifying take the tablets they give ya. breast feeding is very sore at first and your breasts will go rock hard and nipples will hurt like hell but if you get over first two weeks all will be fine (lots of nipple cream slap it on and painkillers) also your knackered and will be covered in all sorts but you wont care but first shower after birth is the best ever.(as you will be sooooo grotty) your belly will also look super weird after birth still like a bump but feel like a massive jelly and it will remain a while but it does all go away eventually. oh and i nearly forgot you will have a massive period that lasts a few weeks - big knickers and extra large pads all the way.

No amount of toilet yoga will help when the stingy little bastard injury you have is a slice out of your inner labia just next to the urethra. See aforementioned tearing ‘up’ - never had any stitches but peeing was nausea-inducing, white-spots-before-the-eyes hell. Even with spouty cups and/or in the bath.

Didn’t happen with second birth, I was very happy - it was worse than the actual birth.

In terms of immediately afterwards I had no real problems. It was a bit sore but that's it. It didn't hurt to go to the toilet. With poos I just sat for a loooong time and took it slow, tried not to strain any more than absolutely necessary.

Cold witchazel soothed the wounds. Also you can put a pad in the freezer before you use it. I found this too cold but it was a suggestion on a website that I read which you may find useful.

Sex hurt for the first bit until we got more into it for the first few times. We didn't have sex again for about two months after delivery. Husband says it feels the same for him and now it feels the same for me!

I did also read not to have saltwater baths as the salt can cause the stitches to dissolve.

It's not all scary horror stories. X

With regards to sex, initially it may feel more roomy but that soon went. What was more surprising was positions pre pregnancy that I loved felt different and were no longer favourites and vice versa. I had definitely changed in what I like so it was like getting to know each other from the beginning

If you need an episiotomy, they inject most of the anesthetic internally, so for me, being stitched hurt more than giving birth. Barely any anesthetic left when they started which was horrid and fucking sore - I continued on gas and air for that.

just seen your comment about sex, i wasnt up for sex till after my 6 week appointment as (massive period before then) also knackered. i found the first time painful but it gets better and normal now. maybe first time use lube, also remember to use protection as your super fertile after having a baby. you will find you have sex at weird times :)

@YouBoggleMyMind that happens to women who've had Caesarians, too.

I had an extended second degree tear and it never really gave me any bother which was strange. Was expecting pain but it never really hurt, not even to wee or sit.
Sex was painful though, until about 8months. This seems to be true of a lot of my friends and of those I’ve discussed it with.

That when u need a poo you darent push because you get birth flashbacks

If you think something isn't right after the birth tell a health care professional and get them to check it out.

@allthatmalarkey my second post was talking generally after having a baby, nothing to do with vaginal verses caesarean births. I should have clarified

After my first I wasn't aware of after pains. I woke up one night and thought I had another baby inside me trying to come out!! I didn't really get them with the next two.

Also drink more than usual before and after the birth, it will dilute your wee so it stings less and make it easier to poo, constipation soon after birth is awful!