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Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

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Original poster

Feel like I'm being bullied into having c-section... help!

90 replies

nowanearlyNicemum · 14/09/2006 14:06

I'm sure this is a subject that has been done to death but I really could do with some advice.

I'm 36 weeks pregnant and my obstetrician seems determined for me to have a second c-section despite me being very clear from day 1 that I want to try for VBAC. Feel like I'm constantly struggling against the incredibly medicalised french health system.
dd was born by emergency c-section 2 years ago due to stagnation - a 2-day labour following induction (aaaargh) and I only got to 4cm.
This time round, I feel totally different. Have been having LOADS of contractions, and some quite painful ones. Yesterday I had a show and when I saw obstetrician this morning she said that my cervix was short (not sure if that's the correct english terminology ) so that's got to be a good sign. But the baby is still very high up (although head down). However, she thinks that the baby will be bigger than dd and is sending me for a pelvic scan to see whether planned c-section would be the best route.
I'm having the scan on Tuesday and then she'll make 'her' decision. I'm desperate for some hard facts to back up how I feel. Why does it feel like everyone else is making the decisions about how I have MY baby?
I'm not stupid. I'm quite prepared to accept that if there is a danger for my baby I'll have to have a 2nd c-section. It's just that I've not felt 'listened to' from the word go and that she was just stringing me along, waiting for the day when she'd say - 'Right, well we'll book you in for your section then'.
Would appreciate your experience, opinions etc...

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

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NotQuiteCockney · 14/09/2006 14:09

If you want a VBAC, you should try for a VBAC. Thing is, if you've had a previous section, you can nearly always bail from the labour and say "no, that's it, sod it, I want a section". So you have an escape hatch, so to speak. It doesn't sound like labour would be harmful to you or the baby, you don't have placenta prevaria.

And if you wait until the baby is ready to come out, the baby will be fully cooked, better at bf, etc etc. If the consultant thinks a c-section is the inevitable result, well, then, fine, but why not let the baby get big first?

Do you have any midwives? (sage-femmes in french, I think?)

Original poster

nowanearlyNicemum · 14/09/2006 14:18

thanks for the vote of confidence NQC.
that's what I thought I had got my obstetrician to agree to - 'a trial labour'. At least then, if it ends in c-section I'll feel like I've given it ago and I'm not under the impression that I'm damaging the baby in the process. Does that sound selfish? I do honestly believe it's better for the baby too. No, I don't have placenta praevia.
I am in contact with one 'sage-femme' as I'm following her ante-natal classes but she doesn't work at the hospital. The other contact I've had with the mid-wives at the hospital has been really great but always with someone different and no-one I could really turn to for support and/or advice if that's what you were asking.

OP posts:

PrettyCandles · 14/09/2006 14:18

Not been in your situation, but I wonder whether this site
might be helpful.

PrettyCandles · 14/09/2006 14:19

Sorry, this site

PrettyCandles · 14/09/2006 14:21

Argh! Why does the Mumsnet url keep creeping in?

THIS SITE !

PrettyCandles · 14/09/2006 14:21

I give up!

www.caesarean.org.uk

NotQuiteCockney · 14/09/2006 14:23

PC, I think that happens when you don't put before the link. Here's the link, anyway.

FYI, I had DS1 by elective section (footling breech), and he had breathing problems afterwards, which meant he was in SCBU for 30 hours, and then we had problems bf, because he didn't get a chance to latch on in all that time.

I had a very gentle trial of labour with DS2 - lots of prelabour, my waters broke, there was meconium, but his head wasn't engaged, and I wasn't even effaced (wasn't short). So we went for a section then, and it was easy and much better than DS1's section.

NotQuiteCockney · 14/09/2006 14:24

Ha, I misspelt caesarian!

Here .

MatNanPlus · 14/09/2006 14:28

here it is

think you might have missed the pretty candles

MatNanPlus · 14/09/2006 14:29

NQC

Original poster

nowanearlyNicemum · 14/09/2006 14:30

thanks for the link!!
will have a good read of all that.

interesting to hear your experience too NQC. do they know what the breathing problems were due to? just not being ready to come out or something more sinister?

OP posts:

NotQuiteCockney · 14/09/2006 14:41

Well, we never found out properly. They thought it was maybe an infection, but I doubt it.

I think it was mostly down to them not having suctioned his lungs well enough (fluid in lungs gets pushed out from contractions etc in labour, but not in section, particularly not if breech). He was pretty well-cooked, I think he was 39+5.

But going into labour etc gives you hormones to get the milk ready, and your baby hormones to get him or her ready to come out.

There has been a recent media story about babies born by section dying a lot more in the first few days than babies born by labour. They don't know why, but it looks like lung issues. (Obviously deaths are quite rare in both cases, but twice as likely for section babies!)

NotQuiteCockney · 14/09/2006 14:42

Oh, the absolutely terrifying thing about the lung thing? I was the one who spotted it. Room full of medical professionals and equipment, and I was the first one to notice, hey, his forehead is blue. (And then DH thought it was ok!)

mazzystar · 14/09/2006 14:46

Thanks for that link NQC - v informative site.

Interesting what you said about your emergency section being a lot more positive experience than your elective. My Ds was eventually born by emergency CS after 18 hours, and I found the whole experience very calm and positive. Still don't want another one much though!

Nownearly - hope you can find the support that you need and get the birth that you hope for.

kdinas · 14/09/2006 14:50

Is that true about breastmilk?
I always had problems breastfeeding ds3, and unfortunately had to give him formula after day 3. It was heartbreaking!
I always wondered if it was something to do with the c-section. I fed ds2 fine, but I had gone into labour naturally, and had a section when fully dilated.
They both had problems with mucous(sp?), which I thought must be lnked with c-section.

Original poster

nowanearlyNicemum · 14/09/2006 14:55

kdinas, do you mind me asking why you had to have a c-section when you were fully dilated?

OP posts:

kdinas · 14/09/2006 15:02

I was told it was due to fetal distress, I was very angry at the time, especially when they gave me what seemed like five minutes to push him out and all stood around staring at my noonah and shouting at me!
They then tried forceps for two seconds, and rushed me to theatre. Ds born, no problems apgars of 9.
Then second c-section for failure to progress.
Trying for vbac again, with very supportive nhs midwife, who agrees with me! Met her last week, have been on cloud nine, nothing can touch me mode since then.

3andnomore · 14/09/2006 15:10

nowanearlyNicemum,
it is not uncommon for Consultants to sort of put the pressure on towards the end after going "with" our own plans...I suppose we are more vunarable by then and easilier to pressure into things..grr...!
Hope you get the Birth that you want.
As for the Breastfeeding thing...can't really comment, I had to natural Births and last one was Emergency C-section after getting fully dilated (he was OP and in the Military position and apparenlty I started having Badls Ring-but I am not sure if I actually believe that, as I have the feeling that they made that up, as they knew how disappointed I was by having to transfer to Hospital at the end of labour), and bf was fine then...but I have heard of the connection of labour and Breastmilk production before!

Original poster

nowanearlyNicemum · 14/09/2006 15:35

enlighten me... what's badls ring?

breastfeeding was fine after my emergency c-section with dd too - but as you pointed out, I'd had nearly 48 hours in labour to help those old hormones.

has anyone out there been told that they had to have a c-section as the baby was going to be a whopper and tried to give birth naturally anyway???

OP posts:

Rochwen · 14/09/2006 15:46

I had an elective section without going into labour and dd1 breastfed with no problems from day one even though she was six weeks premature.

Original poster

nowanearlyNicemum · 14/09/2006 16:28

It's not the breastfeeding aspect that's worrying me to be honest.
I need some ammo to persuade my consultant to 'let me' try a natural birth.

OP posts:

3andnomore · 14/09/2006 16:36

oops that was meant to be Bandles Ring/Bandls Ring (not sure about the spelling)...but basically it is soemthing where your Uterus doesn't contract properly anymore and basically it is something like a ring of contractions, which could lead to Uterine Rupture...but this condition is extemely rare! Which is why I don't believe I had it, iykwim!

lulumama · 14/09/2006 16:39

Hi - i had a succesful VBAC 14 months ago - my first labour sounds similar to yours - i had a failed induction, labour stalled etc...had MRI scan when first child 6 weeks old and showed all well. started asking for VBAC at booking in and kept on and on!! consultant was favourable but gave me odds of 50 - 50. you've still got 4 weeks to go , if your cervix is shortening already and you've had a show, your body seems to know what it is doing! i had a show, then labour started spontaneously 9 days later, had vaginal birth, with lots of gas and air and some pethidine! It is possible, but you need to be confident in yourself and believe in your body. Don't be put off, a trial of labour is absolutely reasonable! natural birth should be the norm, not the exception! good luck! xx

3andnomore · 14/09/2006 16:57

tried to find a link that explains it better then I, lol...but couldn't find much...but here is a link anyway...
Bandls ring Info

Original poster

nowanearlyNicemum · 14/09/2006 17:03

lulumama, thank you thank you thank you
that's exactly what I needed to hear. I DO trust in my body and I know what I want for me and for my baby - I wouldn't have got this far with my persuasion in France otherwise.
I just needed to know I wasn't completely insane to keep insisting despite all 'medical' advice to the contrary. So thanks - and well done you!!

3andnomore - thanks for that, you learn something new everyday!!

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