Are you honest when asked by a new Mum to be if labour is painful ?

[scarymamma]

My s-i-l is pregnant with her first and my bf is considering it. They keep asking me how painful labour is and I'm unsure how honest I should be. They are both very concerned about the pain factor! If I tell them the honest truth (yes, it hurts like @!#*), will that just worry them?
I remember feeling annoyed because my other s-in-l and friends were economical with the truth when I was pregnant with my first.

What would you do and what did your friends/family tell you?

Always completely honest. I don't think it helps to lull people into a false sense of security.

OO - I know exactly what you mean with how powerful your body felt when the urge to push happened. My urge came before I was ready and I just remember shouting " I have to push! I have to push!" It took all my strength to hold that back until my cervix fully dilated. Powerful explains it perfectly.

Oh I'd forgotten all about the first poo... Weeing was horrendously painful too at first - until a nice midwife told me to pour a jug of warmish water over myself while having a wee - that helped so much.

You do forget about it all when you're just sitting for endless hours staring at their beautiful (sleeping) face though. Honest

I'm always honest but I think it's impossible for someone to get the idea of the level of pain until they do it anyway. After all, before childbirth what can most of us compare it to? Toothache? Period pain? Breaking a bone? Backache?

I just say it does hurt if you have no pain relief. Course it does!

My sister says her root canal work was 10 times worse than childbirth by the way

Havnt read all this thread, but dont like to tell them how painful it really is. a) it would scare them and b) they might think me dam cruel telling them such a horrible truth. Just like to tell them it is really painful and if you need pain relief its there. Always say that an epidural is brilliant. mind you some people find it a piece of cake. not me....

Ditto - haven't read all of this thread - but there really is no point in lying is there? She'll find out sooner rather than later - unless it all goes absolutely swimmingly and
the baby pops out in a sneeze!

be honest - it's better to be as mentally prepared as you can be IMO.

I think deep down they know that it is horribly and indescribably painful - they just want reassurance that they can do it - which you can give them. If someone had told me that it wasn't that bad I wouldn't have believed them anyway, most of us just know its not going to be a laugh - but it has to be done!

Yes. Because so many people lied to me and I wanted to kill them all. Anyway the drugs do work despite what richard ashcroft would have you believe, so you can calm them down with that news. I also don't think we should tell expectant mums ALL the grim details either though, sometimes ignorance is bliss!

Bumpybel- I thought sex that early again would be a no no, especially given the amount of stitches I had, but honestly your body repairs itself very quickly. We didn't plan to but One morning ds was actually asleep and one thing led to the other. The best way really as I was dreading it. But it was fine.

I had DD1 in 4 hours with just gas and air (mainly because MWs thought I was just being a drama queen) DD2 in 2 1/2 hours homebirth with gas and air again and both hurt like hell. First time In honestly thought I was going to die. I don't get a build up no signs just ouch that hurt to let me die now, I dilate very quick. With DD2 I had this big plan that I was going to be more in control because I had been through it and was going to chant that each contraction was one less, when the time came I went to pieces, screamed the place down mostly telling DP that I couldn't do it. But the minute wach baby was out the pain goes and it is the most wonderful feeling in the world. It is utter hell but I would do it again tomorrow for another baby

I tell childless friends yes it is torture but well well worth it.