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Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

as requested, for those that do not already know, my birth story

176 replies

StrandedBear · 04/04/2012 12:19

This crops up a lot on various threads, and I feel terrible for hi-jacking threads.

I didn't know I was pregnant until I had DD. That sounds absurd, and I still don't really believe it myself.

I was a first year uni student so you can only begin to imagine my lifestyle, kebabs every week, binge drinking, weed, fags, the lot. I'm sure I don't have to spell it out to you.
I have ibs and was on the pill, and whilst on the pill when you have a break from the pill you have what is called a 'ghost bleed' this is not an actual period.

This may be the time to mention that I left my XP when I started uni and met my current DP (had DD after 4 months of being with DP)

I gave birth on the Friday, I was out clubbing on the Wednesday, had what I thought a horrible hang over on the Thursday morning with chronic stomach pain and vomiting (not the first time I've had a hangover like this) anyway the pain didn't stop all day so I had an early night. Friday morning my pain was still there, so thinking my ibs was playing up I rang for a doctor's appointment but there were non till Monday, fine I'll wait. It got to 6pm and I curled up for a sleep with a hot water bottle and popped 2 paracetamol, I woke at 9 grabbed my car keys to drive to a&e but was in too much pain to make it past the front door. Dropped keys and went to the toilet, it was about 9.55 and DP turns up for no reason at all.

When he arrived I was doubled over my bed, unable to move or speak, he asks me what's wrong and I said something like call an ambulane I'm dying. He says what? Then suddenly my pain changes from all down my back to round my fanjo and something inside me screams 'you are having a baby' DP calls 999 and is told to 'look' he yanks my bottoms down and shouts FUCK IT'S THE TOP OF A HEAD!! so he is on loudspeaker to paramedics, tells me to lie on my back and push, he the delivers dd, and I will remember to this day they asked on the phone 'is it breathing' his response 'no its blue' he then for a couple of minutes rubbed and patted her, and she took her first breaths just as the ambulance arrived to cut her cord.

I am strapped to a chair and carried downstairs with DP by my side and my friend, who had emerged just as the ambulance arrived carrying DD, they whisked me to hospital where they examined me and found no tearing and a perfect baby. She was born 6lbs 10ozs back to back with no pain relief.

DP stayed with me, didn't leave my side for 2 days until I sent him home to shower and tell his parents, and he has stayed ever since. He delivered, revived and has bought up a child that is not biologically his. And without him she wouldn't be here now.

I didn't look pregnant at all, I am a size 10 now and a stone fatter than I was when 9months pregnant.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
JasperJohns · 04/04/2012 17:41

Wow! Amazing story. I just can't imagine the shock and how you came to terms with it all.

I tend to think that when you hear of women not knowing they were pregnant, that they must have been really fat. This knocks that idea on the head!

StrandedBear · 04/04/2012 17:46

Environmental science with geology. I wanted to do nuclear physics but didn't work hard enough at school

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LetsKateWin · 04/04/2012 18:10

I have read your story before, but I still love reading it, and it still makes me cry a little.

You're absolutely amazing and I can't imagine what it took to help you come to terms with everything.

As§others have said, I struggled with DD and she was totally planned and wanted for a squillion years.

Alambil · 04/04/2012 18:18

bloody hell!

What an amazing woman, Stranded.

Your DD is gorgeous

StrandedBear · 04/04/2012 18:22

DP has just told me that at one point he managed to push her head back in because the guy on the phone said 'put light pressure on the babies head' so he did and pop she went back in Hmm

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Swimminglikeaduck · 04/04/2012 18:36

Wow. Just WOW. Thankyou for sharing.
My 2 year old, despite having all the kisses and cuddles from birth, now shouts at me when I enter the room " No kisses mummy". Hmm Think your dd is just being 2. Grin

LadyBeagleEyes · 04/04/2012 19:05

I imagine you'll get a fab career from those subjects Stranded.
I was going to ask how you'd fit in the five children your'e planning on, but I imagine for someone like you, it'll be a walk in the park Grin

birthdaygurl · 04/04/2012 19:16

Wow, your story is amazing, as are you and your truley lovley DP. Smile

MandaHugNKiss · 04/04/2012 19:17

Haha! So she crowned twice! Nice one, DP! Hmm Grin

SpaghettiTwirlerAndProud · 04/04/2012 19:21

Sorry if this has already been covered stranded, but what were your parents and familys reaction when they discovered you'd just randomly had a baby?

SpaghettiTwirlerAndProud · 04/04/2012 19:25

Ok nevermind I just read it :o what lovely parents you have!

formerdiva · 04/04/2012 19:33

Amazing story .

If you ever get a chance to see it, Oprah once did a show on people exactly in your situation where they not only didn't know they were pregnant, they didn't even know they were in labour.

One was a nurse and (like you) a very slim woman. She'd been in a swimsuit that day at a friend's house, but started to feel ill on the journey home. Her friends pulled into a supermarket to get her some aspirin and she described suddenly feeling really Ill, before realising that there was a baby underneath the blanket.

Another lady was breastfeeding her baby on the bed (about 11 mo). Her husband went downstairs, and when he returned there was a new addition on the bed and a shell shocked mother.

Another went for some kind of gyno proceedure, and when the doctor got down to have a look he could see a head.

You should try and get a copy of the show if you can - you're joining a very exclusive club! Congratulations on adjusting to it all. Your DD's very lucky to have you and your DP.

ovaltine · 04/04/2012 19:38

those pics are amazing. and i thought i hid my bump well ha ha ha.

ImperialBlether · 04/04/2012 19:45

Would you think of your DP adopting your DD later, OP? He sounds just the sort of guy you want in your life.

StrandedBear · 04/04/2012 19:46

Grin I know, silly man! Best midwife ever though, and he wants to deliver our brood at home again too (if its safe etc) I am convinced that if is been in hospital I would have ended up with a section or forceps given she was clearly stressed (dead at birth) my labour was so long and she was back to back.

Its amazing that second time mothers don't know, though every pregnancy is different. I bet I get every bugger symptom next time Hmm but I'd choose a terrible dollar coaster pregnancy over what happened to me, I genuinely wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy

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StrandedBear · 04/04/2012 19:49

Imperial we want him to and he would want it more than anything but as xp sees her and is on her birth certificate we need his permission and there is no way on this earth he would say yes. He has even blocked DP having parental responsibility Angry

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SingingSands · 04/04/2012 19:51

Oh wow. Just... wow! Shock

That is an amazing story SB, from start to finish. The birth, your DP, your parents, his parents, your DD. You are all bloody fabulous! Smile

And well done on gaining your distinction, after going through all that I think I would have shut myself in the cupboard under the stairs for 2 years!

SpaghettiTwirlerAndProud · 04/04/2012 19:52

Stranded have you thought about what if it ever happened again?

My sister heard of a woman who had 4 kids and suddenly had terrible pains, thought she was dying, couldn't walk etc, got her 8yo to ring an ambulance (phone in kitchen) and when he went back in the living room on the phone to the operater his mum had a baby.

I mean, surely after 4, even if you had no idea you were pregnant you would recognise labour pains? After 4 kids!

StrandedBear · 04/04/2012 19:55

Spaghetti honestly I live in constant fear. I stopped the pill immediately and now have implant, if I get pregnant with this there is no bloody hope for contraception

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SpaghettiTwirlerAndProud · 04/04/2012 20:08

No hope at all, if that fails you may aswell just cross your fingers! Your xp sounds like a bit of a jealous twat if I'm honest.

dogindisguise · 04/04/2012 20:16

What an incredible birth story. Thank you for sharing it.
Did you not feel the baby move at all during the pregnancy?

StrandedBear · 04/04/2012 20:20

Aye sounds about right.

No not that I noticed, looking back it was quite obvious but at the time any movement was followers by a bowel movement or wind.

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cheesesarnie · 04/04/2012 20:22

amazing! has it put you of having more?

StrandedBear · 04/04/2012 20:25

Cheese we want lots more. Think of that programme 15kids and counting. That will be us!

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GravyHadALumpyMashBaby · 04/04/2012 20:31

Amazing, amazing, amazing! What an incredible little family you are! Thank you for sharing.

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