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Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

as requested, for those that do not already know, my birth story

176 replies

StrandedBear · 04/04/2012 12:19

This crops up a lot on various threads, and I feel terrible for hi-jacking threads.

I didn't know I was pregnant until I had DD. That sounds absurd, and I still don't really believe it myself.

I was a first year uni student so you can only begin to imagine my lifestyle, kebabs every week, binge drinking, weed, fags, the lot. I'm sure I don't have to spell it out to you.
I have ibs and was on the pill, and whilst on the pill when you have a break from the pill you have what is called a 'ghost bleed' this is not an actual period.

This may be the time to mention that I left my XP when I started uni and met my current DP (had DD after 4 months of being with DP)

I gave birth on the Friday, I was out clubbing on the Wednesday, had what I thought a horrible hang over on the Thursday morning with chronic stomach pain and vomiting (not the first time I've had a hangover like this) anyway the pain didn't stop all day so I had an early night. Friday morning my pain was still there, so thinking my ibs was playing up I rang for a doctor's appointment but there were non till Monday, fine I'll wait. It got to 6pm and I curled up for a sleep with a hot water bottle and popped 2 paracetamol, I woke at 9 grabbed my car keys to drive to a&e but was in too much pain to make it past the front door. Dropped keys and went to the toilet, it was about 9.55 and DP turns up for no reason at all.

When he arrived I was doubled over my bed, unable to move or speak, he asks me what's wrong and I said something like call an ambulane I'm dying. He says what? Then suddenly my pain changes from all down my back to round my fanjo and something inside me screams 'you are having a baby' DP calls 999 and is told to 'look' he yanks my bottoms down and shouts FUCK IT'S THE TOP OF A HEAD!! so he is on loudspeaker to paramedics, tells me to lie on my back and push, he the delivers dd, and I will remember to this day they asked on the phone 'is it breathing' his response 'no its blue' he then for a couple of minutes rubbed and patted her, and she took her first breaths just as the ambulance arrived to cut her cord.

I am strapped to a chair and carried downstairs with DP by my side and my friend, who had emerged just as the ambulance arrived carrying DD, they whisked me to hospital where they examined me and found no tearing and a perfect baby. She was born 6lbs 10ozs back to back with no pain relief.

DP stayed with me, didn't leave my side for 2 days until I sent him home to shower and tell his parents, and he has stayed ever since. He delivered, revived and has bought up a child that is not biologically his. And without him she wouldn't be here now.

I didn't look pregnant at all, I am a size 10 now and a stone fatter than I was when 9months pregnant.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Kayzr · 04/04/2012 13:23

Stranded, no matter how many times I read this it always amazes me.

cutegorilla · 04/04/2012 13:24

Wow that's some story! I can't even begin to imagine how traumatic and shocking that must have been for you :(. Your DP does sound like a diamond though :), and it sounds like you've done amazingly well getting back to your studies :).

I do feel really bad though that I didn't really hold or cuddle her when she was a baby, which is why I think she doesn't like cuddles now

My babies were lavished with cuddles but by about 8 months all three became far more interested in playing than cuddling. They will let me cuddle them but rarely seek out a cuddle apart from at bedtime (the older 2, the baby I sneakily cuddle while he's asleep and not fighting to get down and play). Please don't worry about that.

LaVitaBellissima · 04/04/2012 13:24

Wow what a story! In the early days of breast feeding, I used to be addicted to an American programme about unknown pregnancies, I think it was aptly named "I didn't know I was pregnant" Grin
Your DP is a star Thanks

ClaireFromWork · 04/04/2012 13:24

OMG so you POAS @ 8 months and got a negative? How come?

BooMagoo · 04/04/2012 13:25

I wonder if a test would have shown positive with a boy? Male hormones?

StrandedBear · 04/04/2012 13:26

When you are so far through your pregnancy your hormones plateau and tests are pointless. I think a HCP told me at about 6 months you are more likely to get a -ive test than a +ive.

OP posts:
BooMagoo · 04/04/2012 13:28

Learning as we go,here Smile

ClaireFromWork · 04/04/2012 13:32

Stranded was there any kind of support group to help you in that first year, you know, other mums who had gone through the same thing?

BertieBotts · 04/04/2012 13:32

HCG tails off after 12 weeks or so, you can only get a positive pregnancy test in the first trimester.

It's an incredible story. Were you on MN before? (Guessing not!) Just wondered if you posted anything about it at the time?

UnChartered · 04/04/2012 13:32

also, if you're taking the contraceptive pill whilst pregnant, that messes up your test result too

how do i know?

another 7monther here!

maras2 · 04/04/2012 13:32

Welling up here Stranded.Lovely story.All credit to you and DH. Mx.

FriggFRIGG · 04/04/2012 13:33

Shock those pictures...wow,just,wow...

You are amazing.

No wonder you thought you were dying,I did,and I knew I was in labour!

Calamityboo · 04/04/2012 13:33

I knew about the hormones as we tried to play an April fool on a friends DH and I was asked to POAS (7mth pg at the time) I was quite shocked to get a negative!! I have had a real good nosey quick glance at your pics, I am not surprised you did not realise Shock You are so brave! Your DD will not be against cuddles because of what happened, my ds never wanted cuddles as a baby, I thought there was something wrong, then he had a phase of loving a cuddle, now, he is 2.6, not so much again!

BarryStar · 04/04/2012 13:35

Thanks for telling that story, I had heard talk of it before, but hadn't read it.

What did your parents say when they heard? Had you been seeing them regularly in your pregnancy.

It must have been such a huge shock - I think it would have taken me far more than a year to get over it, so hats off to you (and your wonderful dp).

Justfeckingdoit · 04/04/2012 13:35

Stranded, you are amazing :)

Didn't quite get to 9 months, but did only find out I was pregnant at about 16 weeks

I had awful suspected listeria when about 7 weeks and the GP told me I could expect to feel dizzy and sick for months...and I did

Vividly remember going for what I thought was my 12 week scan to be told I was was 21 weeks

Did Shock a lot and then panicked about having spent the non listeria weeks happily boozing and smoking

DD is small for her age and I have awful guilt that that had something to do with it.

I had a friend when I was about 17 who did not know she was pregnant until 5 months and I used to be very Hmm about how she could not have known

More fool me :)

Pootles2010 · 04/04/2012 13:36

Amazing story but I'd think twice about linking to your facebook profile on here. But yes, you and your dp are both amazing - your dd is very lucky.

StrandedBear · 04/04/2012 13:36

I miss that body :( It'll never come back now

OP posts:
Faverolles · 04/04/2012 13:38

I'm sure you've answered this before, but did you feel baby movements?

Hobs · 04/04/2012 13:39

Wow. That's amazing. You and your DP are fabulous!

StrandedBear · 04/04/2012 13:39

Pootles, I am out and proud on here. I have nothing to hide and gave up trying to be incognito a long time ago

OP posts:
YoullLaughAboutItOneDay · 04/04/2012 13:39

Wow OP, what an amazing story. You and your partner both sound amazing - for everything you have achieved since this must have rocked your world!

Please don't blame yourself re cuddles. My DD1 was held and cuddled all the time as a small baby (wouldn't be blooming put down!) and now, aged nearly 3, she isn't that fond of cuddles at all. For a long time she would push us away if we tried to hug her, and went through a phase of saying she was 'busy'. Just in the last month or so she has started to appreciate them more. It may well just be how your DD is.

tara0202 · 04/04/2012 13:39

What an amazing story, I am 8 months pregnant now and the size of a house. You are very brave and your DD is so gorgeous. Can't imagine a much bigger shock than that!

BooMagoo · 04/04/2012 13:40

Your body will come back as you have good basic muscle tone. Mine did. Don't sob!

CrockoDuck · 04/04/2012 13:42

Amazing!

And you look to be very fair skinned, which is why you didn't get that brown line going down your tummy which so many women (75%?) get. I didn't either - although I was mahoosive with my boy.

CroissantNeuf · 04/04/2012 13:42

What an amazing story! Fascinating too.

Can I ask Stranded, what was your body/stomach like straight after you gave birth?

Its just that with visibly, obviously pregnant stomachs that have been stretched to humongous sizes (or was that just me? Wink) once the baby has been born it goes from solid to flabby, loose rolls IYSWIM. As yours had changed so minimally through the 9 months did it look much different after?