Please advise me ASAP - semi-urgent

[LoopyLoopsBettyBoops]

(History - previous EMCS to deliver stillborn and live twins at 32 weeks, treated for PTSD)

I've been in early labour for 2 days. HAd a show, but no waters broken. Been to hospital twice, only 1cm dilated last night. Contractions now much less strong, and about 10 mins apart (last night were strong and 3 mins but stopped). I have said that I would consider a VBAC but am shattered and very upset.
Not seen a doctor since yesterday morning, not sure what to do now. If it doesn't happen tonight I want my C section - I can't handle any more. How do I go about asking for this? Who do I contact? So tired, confused and upset, please help.

Agree with poshme - if you are comfortable doing this Loopy. You have every right to be taken seriously.

You are ringing them and so they are putting you off. You need to SHOW UP. Go and get your bag, your DH and the car. Then go to the hospital. Tell them the truth - you have suffered an enormously traumatic c-section previously, you have now been in slow labour for 2 days and are exhausted and frightened. Nobody with half a brain or heart would try to persuade you to press on with a VBAC in your position. But they are not taking you seriously because you are just a voice on the end of the phone. Go there. See them face to face and get your baby delivered.

I'd show up too tbh. Either way, you are coping amazingly.

:(

I think you are doing brilliantly too. Sending you all my good vibes.

Agreed - get your ass to the hospital - go through A&E if need be. This is your life and your baby needs you to take charge. Bright blessings... let us know how it goes.

But they will just send me home again.

they will not do a elective section tonight. I would second what was said about trying to relax for tonight, get some sleep and then tomorrow morning you can talk to the mw and consultant about getting a time for the cs. You are clearly in no state to go through with a vbac and that's probably why your labour has stalled. Have a bath, get as much sleep as as you can in your own lovely bed and then get on the phone or into the hospital first thing in the morning. DH might think vbac is a good idea but he doesn't have to do it so he doesn't get a say!

Does this sound like a plan?:

Wait and see what happens tonight. If something, deal with it. If not, turn up first thing and demand the c-section.

???

xposts!

sounds like a brilliant plan - just add glass of wine & relaxing bath to the plan!

I agree that you should go down there now, and set it out for them, though really they shouldn't need chapter and verse on it all.

If they send you home, refuse, make a stink, cry if needs be. Just tell them you are beyond worried, completely stressed, make sure they understand about PTSD and what it does to your mind and wellbeing, and insist that this needs to be managed NOW.

Even if it's giving you a bed on the labour ward so that you are there in hospital and within reach of consultants, m/ws, resources etc. Spell it out to them - and to your DH - that one of the reasons for your PTSD was NOT BEING LISTENED TO.

Re your DH. He has to back you up. His view on VBAC, frankly, doesn't carry any weight. Of course what happened must have been beyond terrible for you both but you are the one in labour, you are the one who has to physically, mentally and emotionally go through this. YOU are the priority.

Wine... not got any, but might invest.

Thank you all so much, just finding it hard to keep calm. :)

yikes x-post. if you are genuinely happy at home, great! but please ensure your DH gets it and will whisk you down to the hospital the first time you ask, not put up an argument.

I'm not really, but I haven't the energy to make a fuss right now.

I would call the labour ward and speak to the midwives there - they may be able to get the registrar on duty to call you back and offer advice etc.

Believe me, I've called the 24 hour labour ward at our local hospital for far sillier things than this so they'd be more than happy to deal with your call. Unless dh is planning to perform the VBAC himself (which clearly isn't physically possible) then it's not his decision and his role is to support you 100%.

Loopy-I am absolutely horrified at the way you have been treated. I have also suffered a late stillbirth and also other late losses but the care I had couldnt have been better. I also had consultant led care and had scans/check-ups every 2 weeks(at my insistance) but also knew that I could go in at any point if was anxious. Also I demanded my cs at 38 weeks(they wanted me to wait until 39) but I had had enough of the stress.
Please go to hospital first thing in morning. Ask to speak to head midwife and if you get no joy with her then demand to see your consultant.Good luck.

Okay - the question is simply are you going to be able to relax at home? If you can and your heart rate slows down to a slow canter intstead of a gallop, then you should take it easy,breathe and see what happens.

BUT if you are going to worry all night about what is/may/could/should happen, then you are going to be more exhausted in the morning and even more worried and then you might as well do your worrying in hospital...

Thank you.

( :( )

Contractions picking up again now...

Go

Go girl. Honestly - if labour is picking up then you need to be in hospital. And given your past history they should be booking you for a section in the morning.

But I've been so many times and they just send me home. There's no point.

Keeping my fingers crossed that my waters go isn't really a plan, is it?

Can I just ask - how far is the hospital from your place?

I am amazed they are sending you home. It seems quite callous given your circumstances TBH.

Turning up and insisting on having the baby monitored at the very least would be totally justifiable I think. Going first thing also fine if you can relax at home. But you are doing brilliantly