Nearly 6 year old still head banging and humming to get to sleep.

[MichB86]

Hi, my almost 6 year old little boy is still banging his head into his pillow and humming (sometimes quiet loudly) in order to sooth himself to sleep. He has done this since he was a baby. I’ve read though that it normally stops by about age 3. I’ve asked him why he does it and he says it makes his head feel nice and relaxed. He doesn’t do this behaviour at any other time than to get to sleep. I know it can be connected with autism if done at other times to. He does every now and then stim if he’s really excited about something hand flaps a bit and jumps but this is getting less and less. His communication is great, forms strong relationships and is incredibly imaginative in his play so I don’t think it is autism but I do think he is a very anxious child. Basically what I’d like to know is has anyone else’s child done things like the head banging and humming to soothe to sleep, past the age of 5 and if so when or if it eventually stopped? I’m worried if it continues about things like sleep overs or if he still does it as an adult. I’ve asked him to try and stop but he says he can’t. Hes sharing a room with his younger brother now and it is getting a little frustrating.

Yes I understand how you feel. Our daughter is nearly 8. Since having atomoxitine she's been able to enjoy school for the first time in 3 years. The anxiety was really affecting her enjoyment of life. Anxiety has pretty much gone from 8/10 to 1 or 2. Her usual levels of excitement and drive are still all there so it's only the worries that have decreased. She has some learning challenges so is able to enjoy going to the learning support teachers now rather than dreading it.

My son who is turning 5 next week still headbangs and sings really loudly or hums. He is an anxious little boy too.

Anyone been given any practical advice? I think I am going to try music to fall asleep to or white noise just to try 🤷‍♀️

My daughter head bangs and sings loudly. Also had a lot of anxiety. You can read my earlier responses to see the things we tried. She hasn't stopped it but other behaviours have lessoned with the things we implemented.

Not sure why my post has hidden!

My husband does this. He is 32 years old. I actually suspect he has ASD and he is pending an Neurology evaluation in October. I actually stumbled upon this forum searching for something completely different. He does not hum, but he bangs his head against his pillow every night until he falls asleep.

Yes, my 6 year old daughter does it and has been doing it since she was a baby. She said it helps her relax but I thought a super mature 6 year old like her would stop it by now but she is doing it as I type this message. Idk what to do about it.

Hi, I’ve just been searching for answers on the same question. When I was a child (I’m 45 now) I did the same thing, I found it calmed me down and made me sleepy. There wasn’t really an answer for it back then but if it helps at all I’m almost certain now that I’ve had life long problems with ADHD, compulsive behaviour and OCD. I wish things had been better understood when I was young, if it had been diagnosed then my life would have been much happier.
I still have problems being able to calm my mind down when trying to sleep, I can’t really fall asleep, at night, without some noise in the background to focus on, oddly I can fall asleep pretty much anytime through the day.
good luck

@BenjaminRound Thank you for your post. It’s been a relief to find out that other people have experience of this.

In our case I’m certain it’s connected to our sons not yet diagnosed ASD/ ADHD he seems to develop more and more behaviours the older he gets, most that I have already posted about like the anxiety and repetitive questions. The latest is almost some kind of Tourette’s like random noises out of nowhere. He also just never switches off his mind is constantly racing.

I hope you’ve finally found some support.

I just stumbled across this post my daughter is 4.5 years old and has been headbanging and humming in sleep since about 2 years old. Her development was slightly delayed but she is now highly intelligent social child who shows no nother signs or issues. She does head bang while in the car seat if we are driving and sometimes in the living room on the sofa or the floor but this has only been for the past year. Am concerned she may be on the spectrum, but have doubts as this is the only sign she shows. The health visitor put it down to repetitive movement disorder and her pre school which this is now 3 months into her second year have no concerns and does not appear to be headbanging or show any signs in school. Don't know what to think anymore but I find she does it alot after waking or if she is tired and also in sleep.

Just thought I’d add that I’ve just accidentally stumbled upon what it is actually called and it’s Rhythmic movement disorder. I imagine a lot of you may already know this but I couldn’t believe that after 5 years of googling heading banging to sleep I found it totally by accident 🙈

Still doesn’t really help but at least I know it’s an actual recognised thing. Apparently not much research has been done as it’s very rare past the age of 5 but some people believe there is a link with ADHD and Autism.

Hello,

I know this is an old post but does your son still do this?
My son is 4 and I’m desperately thinking of ways to help him find a different way to fall asleep so it was just to see if your little one managed to find a different way?

Thank you 🙂

Hi, my son is 9 years old now and the frequency has definitely lessened, I only hear him maybe once or twice a week. We have also received a diagnosis of adhd and sensory processing disorder.

My son is 8 now and if on his tummy will do it multiple times through the night still. We have recently been seeing a sleep consultant, he has had a sleep study done which typically that one night - he didn’t do it!! Most likely because of all the wires he had on him everywhere.
He also has worn an actigraphy watch for 2 weeks which was collecting data and now on a slow release melatonin (which we have not seen any difference with taking it) we are to meet with the consultant again soon to see what the results are from these tests.

What we have literally just found that has worked really well for us and so far the only thing that has worked, is to have a pillow on his tummy (like a travel pillow) clipped around his torso. This stops him from rolling onto his tummy and he’s actually found it really comfortable and very happy to wear it.

My son has just come back from his first school residential trip which was two nights, my worry was of course him banging and humming waking everyone else in his dorm all night. The travel pillow worked a treat!! He slept perfectly both nights!!

Our son in every day life does well at school, sports and sociable boy so it is very much thought of so far as a habit that he has not yet out grown.

Just to add what advice the consultant told us. Try other methods for him to go to sleep - which we had tried absolutely everything but the key thing she said was to reward him when he did that method - not reward him because he did not bang or hum to go to sleep, also, try the mattress on the floor too.
Advice we were giving the whole time from doctors/consultants was to completely ignore it. That was pretty impossible for us as it was so loud and disturbing but they were basically saying not to make it a thing. We were also told he should outgrow in by the time he’s 4-5 years old but that didn’t happen in our case. They have said his sleep disorder is called - sleep related rhythmic movement disorder.

My son is now 6 and still doing this. I do suspect some neurodiversity as his sibling is and he has a couple of other quirks, but much less so as he matures. So I’m not sure

For us it’s not disruptive as he sleeps in his own room and is only hanging his head onto his hands, on top of his pillow, or just onto his pillow. He doesn’t do it to go to sleep at the start of the night, more if he wakes up in the middle. He’s half asleep doing it though, not really aware.

The pillow strapped round his middle is interesting!

So helpful to find these posts! My son is 7 and still does this mildly. When he was little, it used to be SO loud but it has gradually decreased in intensity over time. My son has always had a few mild autistic traits, like sensory sensitivity, a fussy eater, cautious in new environments etc. but generally happy, friendly and sociable so we don’t think he would be classed as ASD. Hopefully the head banging will stop altogether eventually… I do worry about him putting off future girlfriends due to his anti social sleeping habits haha :) x