your child freedom formula - has anyone tried it?

[lu9months]

ive seen adverts for this on fb. they claim to be able to cure anxiety in young people. im suspicious - and nowhere does it tell you the cost. however im fairly desperate since my 16 year old is very disabled by anxiety. thanks

@Psuedoshoes - I think in this case you would as ‘Sam’ refers to herself as Sam in all her videos and posts. In fact I’ve not seen very much stuff that’s posted using Samantha at all

Interesting new Ad approach from YCFF!

www.facebook.com/ads/library/?id=159682029519115

@Psuedoshoes

On an of course completely separate note, does anyone here automatically shorten somebody's name who you are completely unfamiliar with? Random example - if somebody's name was 'Samantha', would you automatically shorten their name and refer to them as 'Sam', despite not being invited to do so...?

People shortening you name (or indeed using first name without being invited) is a (relatively standard?) technique in sales to build a feeling of friendship / we're on the same side, so I'm not at all surprised if they use it on prospective clients.

@SwanShaped

I hadn’t thought about it from that point of view comfy. If something is supposed to be guaranteed, and then it doesn’t work, it could make the teenager feel even worse! I’d thought about feeling worse from other points of view, eg having bad or damaging therapy. But not thinking about how this ‘failing’ would feel.

I agree with that.

We are about to try CBT for DD. I have been very clear with her that although it works for a lot of people and is therefore 'worth a try', a good proportion don't get on with it. She needs to be permitted to try and it not work, without like feeling she has failed.

Unlike YCFF where if it fails it is apparently all the parents' fault

Maybe I've just been admonished one too many times for shortening people's names who really didn't like it, I had a particular run in with a Matt Matthew once..

Good luck with the CBT. I've got a few appointments next week with various specialists so I'm hoping to find the right fit on a pay per session basis. Here's hoping for us all 🤞

I hope you do get in well with the CBT, I’d suggest being involved. With ours it was private so I wasn’t invited. Unfortunately that meant I couldn’t help put anything into practice when she was struggling. When it had finished she was having more bad days than before. Trying not to go into too much detail but it focussed on how her anxiety makes her feel and how it escalated easily. Taught her skills for when it happens. She’s terrified of being sick but her anxiety starts with a feeling in her stomach so she panics and ends up making herself sick, those skills are useless. It’s a very difficult hole to get out of as graduated exposure doesn’t work, that’s why she felt hopeless at the end, when I pointed that out to the counsellor she agreed it was difficult and changed the subject. That’s why my daughter feels completely hopeless right now. But at least she’s eating at the moment.

Oh gosh comfy that sounds tough. Do you think the exposure could have just been going too fast? My DD had / has different issues but I think one of the ways I've moved things forward a tiny bit is by letting go of what a 'gradual step' might look like, I'd say progress can be much much slower than anyone would like / expect. Thinking about it, that's actually one of the things that worries me about YCFFs approach, as you say, there's a huge potential for feeling like you've failed. You're totally right to protect your daughter from that.

Ps, I am genuinely baffled / confused by what is going on with YCFF's FB at the moment!

When this thread first started, I thought that YCFF we're well meaning / possibly good at what they do, but with a really inappropriate approach to marketing and publicity. I cant understand why as a business owner you would go out to damage your own reputation so badly, firstly with responses to reviews, and now with the latest Facebook updates /ads. And why you wouldn't come onto this thread and answer questions (and maybe encourage your customers not to further damage your reputation here). Or if not that, at least just ignore the thread?

The final CBT session was us sitting together to look at what first steps might look like and she wasn’t prepared to try any of them. She’s hidden away for so long that anything seems massive (COVID doesn’t help). We are trying to get her involved in anything as she’s really bored (not bored enough to go anywhere though). Crafts, games, pub trips and anything very local that she can manage. Anything new is a no go, either distance or what if I’m anxious when I get there. We never really got as far as planning gradual steps, she’s better when it’s not planned, less pressure.

comfy it sounds like you're meeting her needs at this moment, and I hear you so much about reducing pressure to virtually zero. My kids need the same. Sometimes it can feel like we are doing absolutely nothing. Covid has defo not helped. Xx

Something from my therapist friend who I was just speaking to is this:

Anxiety exists in the past and future but right NOW it isn’t here so focus on the now; do something that you can bring your full focus to (mindfulness) like paint your nails/toe nails. Sing to your favourite song (I’ll sing with you!) or write in your journal about something you want to do in the future when you’ve taught this anxiety monster who is in charge (you!).

My therapist friend also suggested you look at DNA-V which is an ACT approach directed at teens (quite different to CBT I think). There are quite a few good self help books on this directed at teens.

Did anyone have any joy finding the 'flappy ears' origination?

I decided to take some time out this afternoon and follow my therapist freinds advice for my own anxiety which is through the roof today and I actually painted my toe nails. I haven't painted them for ages, and it is nice to see a bit of sparkle each time I look down at my feet.

Oh and here's a book recommendation from MTF:

The Mindfulness and Acceptance Workbook for Teen Anxiety: Activities to Help You Overcome Fears and Worries Using Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (Instant Help Book for Teens)

@GoodButNaughty Thanks for the recommendation - am looking it up right now x

Er, no it's not? It's quite rude actually to assume anybody is OK with their name being shortened. Basic sales technique would be to address their name as it's presented to oneself... pretty standard(?) really

That was a reply to teenminus - quote didn't work.

macca oh do you think that FB comment could be fake / someone already known to YCFF then? Or just bad salesmanship.

I think it might be a current programme user tbh...

All I can see on the YCFF fb that was linked to is a lady called Samantha seemingly unknown to YCFF sticking up for them, yet being called Sam straight away. I'd say that was either downright rude - OR - she was known to YCFF....

Hi @GoodButNaughty,
I've not been on here for a while but my child has been doing brilliantly on this programme. I understand that you are upset because your friend had a bad experience but there are a large number of families who have had amazing success with this and so your claim that it is not fit for purpose is not true. The majority of families using the formula just get on with their mentor and don't have anything to do with the owner etc. All i can say is it has changed my child's life for the better when none of the other strategies could.

@Noodle2571 - I’m glad it is working for your family. Have you read the whole thread? Have you tagged just me specifically for a reason?

I have some questions you’ll clearly not mind answering if it’s working so well for you:

• Did you pay £5500 for it?
• Does your mentor have a DBS check?
• What training has your mentor undertaken?

Hi noodle that's good it's working well for you. Not speaking for good, but a few of the posters on here have noted that the high level of support and peer support etc, could be a really good way to help some kids with anxiety.

The things I am concerned about (again I'm not speaking for other people who have posted on this thread) are the public sharing of children's personal and sensitive information and identities, on the website and replies to Trustpilot reviews, and the use of a "high ticket coaching" business model which I feel is totally inappropriate for a company selling a service to vulnerable families.

The recent posts on Facebook, as well as being very reactive (similar to some of the trustpilot replies), also cause me to worry that the people running YCFF don't understand the importance of not sharing their customer's sensitive data, particularly that of children.

Data privacy / ownership is something I feel really strongly about, as well as having gone through parenting anxious children / teens, which is probably why I've kept coming back to this thread.

@GoodButNaughty
Hi, I messaged you because you said it was not fit for purpose but as far as I know you haven’t enrolled. I was on the thread weeks ago but it’s not for me going back and forth etc. Yes it has been really positive for us as a family.
We have paid that amount.
As far as the mentor goes they have been trained to deliver the programme which they have done really well. As far as dbs goes I haven’t asked and that’s ok as I have heard all of the sessions so don’t feel that is an issue. When I saw my child smiling and happier from a couple of weeks in those sorts of concerns don’t feel that important. To be honest I’m pretty shocked by how well it’s going as I wasn’t a hundred percent convinced at the beginning as it appeared too good to be true.

Hi Mibb,
I agree with some of what your saying and think they probably need a better marketing strategy and it appears that they are making changes on that front but as I’ve said all of that becomes pretty unimportant when you are doing it and it works. Peer support doesn’t work if your child doesn’t have friends because they’re so anxious and won’t attend support groups. The1:1 mentoring with someone who gets it has been invaluable.

It's good that it's working for you noodle and I can see how these things would pale into insignificance if you are getting help.

That's exactly why there should be regulation of these types of services. As has been mentioned a few times in this thread, no company should be above scrutiny, and transparency becomes even more important when dealing with vulnerable families and young people.

By peer support, I meant support of other parents, and having young mentors to support the young people.

I'm genuinely glad it's working for you, and I don't think you should have to defend YCFF and how they run their business. I will still keep following this thread as it still worries me that have poor practise around privacy and use a high ticket coaching business model, which I believe is inappropriate / unethical for this type of service.